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#351
Aug 06, 2019, 09:38 AM
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Dear T,
Perhaps you're tired of me. Perhaps we're tired of each other. Or perhaps I've just come as far as I can with you. LT |
 CantExplain, Lrad123, SlumberKitty
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#352
Aug 06, 2019, 12:38 PM
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Dear T: I haven't done the exercise where I write as little me with my right hand and as Mommy me with my left hand. I just don't know what to say. Maybe I should tell you I had selective mutism as a child. I have no words. Kit
__________________
Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
| CantExplain, Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight
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#353
Aug 06, 2019, 05:30 PM
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Dear both Ts,
That was an idiotic move on my part that I just made, esp. since I don't ever do things w/out thinking them through. And now I am never going to sleep tonight. Wtf was I thinking. Oh wait, I definitely wasn't. I can barely breathe.
__________________
"Take me with you, I don't need shoes to follow, Bare feet running with you, Somewhere the rainbow ends, my dear." - Tori Amos |
| CantExplain, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, SlumberKitty, unaluna
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#354
Aug 06, 2019, 05:44 PM
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Dear T: I feel close to crisis today. But I'm going to stay strong and make it through to my appointment with you on Friday. I'm not going to the hospital. I need to just breathe and not be so upset. Wish you were here. Or I was there. Kit
__________________
Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
| CantExplain, daisydid, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, SheHulk07
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#355
Aug 06, 2019, 07:55 PM
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Dear T,
I feel a bit like a piece of property, with you dictating who I can and can't talk to about what. Or perhaps a child. LT |
| CantExplain, SlumberKitty
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#356
Aug 07, 2019, 12:19 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
 SlumberKitty
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#357
Aug 07, 2019, 02:08 AM
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Dear T,
I don't think I can do this anymore with you. I thought you'd changed and grown, but I'm thinking I was wrong. It's too much about you. But it's not really about *you.* I mean some of it is, like you're being a **** right now. But I feel the anger and hurt I'm feeling is really mostly about something else, like childhood/my parents. LT Last edited by LonesomeTonight; Aug 07, 2019 at 02:42 AM. |
| CantExplain, InkyBooky, SlumberKitty
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#358
Aug 07, 2019, 04:45 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
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#359
Aug 07, 2019, 04:47 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
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#360
Aug 07, 2019, 04:49 AM
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Quote:
Can you tell him that face to face?
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
| Echos Myron redux
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| LonesomeTonight
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#361
Aug 07, 2019, 06:26 AM
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Quote:
He'd probably go on about how it hurt his feelings or something. Or he'd get angry at me. Probably not worth it. |
| SlumberKitty
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#362
Aug 07, 2019, 06:41 AM
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Quote:
Even long term T...I was really rude to quite a bit. Tell him to F off. If it's how you feel
__________________
Grief is the price you pay for love. |
| CantExplain, Echos Myron redux, InkyBooky, LonesomeTonight
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#363
Aug 07, 2019, 10:31 AM
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Baby T is so freaking adorable . He looks like you
__________________
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| CantExplain, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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#364
Aug 07, 2019, 12:52 PM
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Quote:
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| CantExplain, SlumberKitty
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#365
Aug 07, 2019, 03:35 PM
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I made a fool of myself today. I began to cry in front of the receptionist at my brothers doctors surgery when i went in to complain ( something the old me would never even have considered before) - when my aunt came to pick my grandfathers prescription she also handed my brothers one too as the address is the same.
She obviously saw that he was prescribed Fluoxetine and made comments to my mother about what did he have to be about. She apologized and said she was sorry and only trying to help. She actually came around and gave me a hug. So I left.
Possible trigger:
I also did the first day of my surgery placement - i wanted to leave the moment I got there.
__________________
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| CantExplain, LonesomeTonight, LostOnTheTrail, NP_Complete, SlumberKitty
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#366
Aug 07, 2019, 03:38 PM
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God this is hard. Unlovable is much more obvious and manageable.
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| CantExplain
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#367
Aug 07, 2019, 03:40 PM
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Roll on next Thursday. I hope you're having a good break, but I am looking forward to being able to talk.
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
| LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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#368
Aug 07, 2019, 04:26 PM
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t,
i really wish i could spend the whole day with you. would we have a good time, or would i be disappointed? see you soon... me
__________________
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. |
| LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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#369
Aug 07, 2019, 04:39 PM
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Quote:
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| Lemoncake
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| CantExplain
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#370
Aug 07, 2019, 04:58 PM
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Dear T,
Thanks, your comment about caring meant a lot. That you said that the category doesn’t determine the level of caring. How you can care quite a lot even if it’s on a clinical level. From what you said today, I feel like you care very much about me. It’s just a different caring than for a friend or family member. I’m ok with that. And I felt the caring. I think that’s what I didn’t feel Monday. Love, LT |
| SheHulk07, SlumberKitty
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| CantExplain
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#371
Aug 07, 2019, 06:07 PM
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Dear exT today I am flooded with love hate anger frustration towards you. It is immobilising and not helping my depression any.
Possible trigger:
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| CantExplain, LonesomeTonight, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty, UnderRugSwept
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#372
Aug 07, 2019, 06:09 PM
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HUGS @BlessedCheeseMaker HUGS
__________________
Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
| CantExplain
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#373
Aug 07, 2019, 06:31 PM
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It’s kind of annoying that T said I could always call her and used to return my calls and even a couple weeks ago said “call if anything comes up.” I’ve called twice since she’s said that and she hasn’t responded. She mentioned my call from last week when I saw her on Monday. So it’s not like she’s not getting them. Then yesterday I did have a very difficult day and I called her and I haven’t heard back. I don’t really get it. Why she’d all of a sudden stop answering calls.
__________________
"Good morning starshine.... the earth says hello"- Willy Wonka |
| LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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#374
Aug 07, 2019, 08:15 PM
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Quote:
Exam on the 2nd of september.
__________________
Last edited by Lemoncake; Aug 07, 2019 at 08:34 PM. |
| Anonymous42961, SlumberKitty, unaluna
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#375
Aug 07, 2019, 08:36 PM
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T3... I wish I could see you now. I don't miss you or anything but just so drained emotionally. I haven't felt this low since T left. Sigh....
__________________
Grief is the price you pay for love. |
| LonesomeTonight, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty, zoiecat
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