Couch 209: The Kummer Couch

My Dad just texted me and was all like, you want pizza tonight? Um...yeah!!

We have "communication training" tomorrow at work....I wonder what that is...
maybe it's "don't skype your boss at 2 AM in the morning!!!" although to be fair, it was 5 in the morning her time, and she was the one who Skyped me first. But I did Skype her at midnight, so......

I hope we don't have to roll play during this "communication training." Ugh

I'm pretty sure I took communications at uni but for the life of me I don't remember what we did in that class.....

I’m sitting in the hair salon getting my color done.

I’m sick in my stomach. Work was annoying today. I didn’t want to be there. At all. I’m also pretty sure I have baby vomit on my shoes.

Went Christmas shopping with my dad tonight, then to dinner with him, H, and D. Shopping went as well as it goes, I suppose (I mostly do online shopping now, so being in a mall for a few hours is like .) He's generally very liberal in his politics, like, watches Rachel Maddow regularly liberal. But tonight he made this sort of offhanded racist comment (about next-door neighbors that could potentially be moving in), and I sort of froze in how to respond. Like I said something like, "They might be very nice people" and "Remember that I'm the minority in my neighborhood..." But I don't feel I responded strongly enough. It just threw me off--my mom might make those comments, but generally not my dad. Part of me is tempted to email him about it, but H is like, "Don't bother, he probably won't even remember saying it." Just feel weird about it...

I’d leave it be and maybe say something more if it happens again. Ya know?

I had my Lupron shot today and I’m completely knocked for a loop. My limbs feel too heavy to move.

I am in a self-hatred spiral. Also, my T confronted me about me having an eating disorder, tonight. All around fun!

This is weird because now on tapatalk, every time I scroll through the forums I just see a giant collage of my eye as the preview for this thread..

Effin lady hormones. Remember when Manny couldnt hit anymore because of 'em? Those were the good ol' days! #stickball

I slept about 2 hours last night and today is my really long day at work. 7am-9pm.

If I’m still standing at the end of this day it will be a miracle. Normally I would get by today knowing I’m off tomorrow but this week I am not off because the boy goes for his evaluations on Friday so his mother has to work tomorrow in exchange for taking off Friday. I’m also working Friday though because I have to watch the other kids while he’s being tested. So Once I get home at 9, I have to return to work tomorrow at 7:30am for 10 hours then 7:30 am Friday.

Wow @Jersey 4 that's a long work day! I don't know how you do it.

Jersey, how do you do it? I find it tiring to watch my own kid for that long without a break. I can't imagine THREE of somebody else's kids!

It’s really exhausting. So far today the 4 year old is acting okay-thank goodness.

Same here! I'm also impressed by your ability to do this, Jersey.

@Lemoncake, you will be happy to know that my EMDR/DBT T referenced The Little Prince today when we were talking about my regular T telling me that I have a problem with needing to feel special. I guess I should actually go read it now....

Hang in there @Jersey 4!!!! Remember you are doing a great job!

I'm feeling kind of depressed today. Not horribly so, but not really in a good space. Oh well. Regular T tonight. She'll probably say something generally unhelpful like, you need to join another book club. Yeah. Right.

My parents are going to be gone for two days which I usually don't do so well when they are gone. I might go to Disneyland on Friday. Or the hospital. If I'm not feeling well enough. You know it's bad when you can't decide between Disneyland and the hospital. Sigh.

@SlumberKitty I’m sorry you’ve been struggling so much recently. I hope your t is helpful today. I also hope you know that we’re all here for you, whichever way the appointment goes.

Info fashion report: blue velour leggings, red shoe boots, white cross earrings, maroon sweater with glitter on the cuffs and a normal neckline, except for the diagonal downslash to the right that exposed cleavage.

We talked some about the novel I’m planning out. She said it was dark and would make her anxious to read. She asked why I can’t write romances with happy endings. I said darkness and evil are more interesting than goodness and light. This appeared to be the first time she’d ever considered that.

I forebore from pointing out that if there were only goodness and light in the world, she would not have a lucrative job to do as badly as she does.

Interesting point, ATAT.

I find that I cannot write fiction when I am not doing well. It comes across as forced.

Pretty view from the top of the mountain!



I was planning to ski today and tomorrow but my quads are totally wrecked; I don’t think I can manage another day! Luckily I held off and didn’t buy a lift ticket yet (I had a sneaking suspicion this might happen )

Ugh I was doing fine today, and then I literally just spiraled in the last like 10 minutes. So I start work an hour from now, and I just felt sick to my stomach out of nowhere and (TMI warning) threw up. My stomach feels terrible when I try to get up from the couch. I didn’t want to call off work, but also kind of wanted to give my boss a heads up so that if I felt too sick to work at any point today, she’d already be in the loop and mentally prepare for the possibility of finding backup since we are short staffed.

I called my boss and told her that I wanted to give her a heads up because something just hit me and I got sick out of nowhere, and right now it still hurts to stand up. I told her I wanted to try to work today, but wanted to let her know just in case. She told me to just keep her updated.

My husband told me I shouldn’t have called her and said that I “got sick out of nowhere” and claimed this sounds like BS. He was like “you should never say that to your boss, it sounds like you’re making it up.” So now I feel awful and guilty, but like.. it actually did come out of nowhere, and I wanted to make sure she knew that because I literally called her an hour before my shift. If I had felt sick earlier to the point that I thought I couldn’t work, I would have told her ASAP to give proper notice.

Now I just feel really guilty and like a terrible person for even calling her at all. I feel like a bad employee and like I don’t deserve anything.