[emmaleemochizuki]

I never did.

There were quite a lot of times I nearly did, but I still kept holding my tears in, even though my voice might start breaking but I still wouldn't give in. I guess I don't know what it is so bad about crying in front of T but I just try so hard to hold it, and I never did cry in front of her ever.

Have you cried?
And how did your T respond?

[Lostislost]

I've cried a lot in therapy. I don't like or dislike doing it, it's just a natural thing that happens when I'm really sad or scared. T might recognise I'm upset, but lately he has not commented on that I'm crying at all and just listens or talks to me.

[stopdog]

I never cried at a therapy appointment. I never had any reason to do so

[*Beth*]

Yes, many times. I've never thought much about it. My T...she looks sympathetic and just gives me time to process a bit.

[zoiecat]

I have never cried in therapy. My eyes have teared up a bit but I will not allow crying to happen. Actually I should say one of my alters comes out when I am about to cry. She will not let me cry in public and I consider my T public. We have talked about it a bit and he always asks why I will not let myself cry in front of my T. I just tell him no, it is not something that can happen. He says it goes with the job but he still has not convinced me.

To me crying shows weakness and is not allowed. It is just how I was raised.

[Amyjay]

We have never really cried in therapy... until very recently. For years and years we had no tears at all (except for privately). Maybe over the last six months we have had watering eyes quite often. In the last two sessions we have actually had tears rolling down the cheeks, and have not switched away from them or had an alter put a stop to them.
Likely only because our primary protector has "stepped back from her duties" for a bit. I guess she is allowing this to happen.
My T tells me this is necessary.

[LonesomeTonight]

I cry more sessions than I don't. Sometimes just tearing up a bit, up to all-out sobbing where I can barely talk. I feel it's a safe space where I can let those emotions out, to also have someone there witnessing and accepting them (as my parents tended to be critical of me if I cried or showed other negative emotion). Sometimes T will ask me why I'm crying, particularly if it seems to come at an unexpected moment. Generally, he just lets me cry (without comment) and we keep talking. Occasionally he wipes away a tear or two himself (though I don't say anything about that).


I find that my tears can sometimes help me realize what's really bothering me, what I may have trouble consciously realizing or admitting to myself. Sometimes it seems like something silly or random, but then when I dig deeper, it can be about something else. So I think it can be useful. But then there are other times when I'm talking about something pretty intense emotionally, but don't shed a tear. I think that can be telling, too.

[nottrustin]

I teared up a couple of times with each T. I cried once with long term T she was very empathetic and fought back tears of her own. At one point near the end of our working together she admitted she had cried a couple of times with me me.

WIth current T I have cried twice. Once after the death of long term T and the other after my daughter was assaulted and I helped her file the police report a few hours before my appointment. She was comforting and supportive. She talked quietly and also fought back tears.

[ElectricManatee]

I cry in maybe a third to half of my sessions. Kind of depends where I am mood-wise in general and what I'm working on in therapy at the time. When I was pregnant I cried more often and with buckets of tears. I wasn't necessarily more upset or emotional when I was pregnant, just that the tears came more easily and copiously. My T usually looks empathetic and sometimes gets a little quieter but mostly we just continue talking.

I had a hard time crying when I first started therapy in my teens because I had a hard time experiencing any negative emotions without forcibly shutting them down (which was part of why I felt so crappy in the first place, although I wasn't aware of it at the time). It felt weird crying in front of somebody at first, but eventually I got used to it.

[velcro003]

I've never cried with my regular, long-term T. I have cried to other T's when I was in an inpatient crisis center.

[GeminiNZ]

It took me a very long time (several years) to feel okay about crying in front of T (it has trauma stuff attached), but now i just let it happen when i need to. Often it's only a bit of teariness and i can talk through it, but sometimes something deep comes up and i need to give myself space to have a damn good blub.

T's reaction can differ depending on what i'm crying about. He usually sits quietly so i don't feel like i need to shut it down. Sometimes he gets teary too (and i'm okay with that for reasons). Often he'll put his hand out for me to hold if i want to. Or he'll move the tissue box a bit closer if i'm getting really wet/snotty.

For me, allowing myself to cry freely in therapy is a marker of progress.

[Creepeh]

One time when seeing a new therapist. I cried so hard I couldn't breathe.

This was before Covid-19 happened.

So he had to guide me through breathing exercises.

A few days after that session, he said we weren't a good fit and dropped me through email.

I haven't been to therapy since that happened.

I normally rarely cry. As I hate doing it. I never feel better after. It always drains me physically and mentally.

Now I'm scared that when I do see a new therapist. That I shouldn't cry or they will drop me.

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

I cry almost every session, but in the beginning I didn't cry at all. Took me about half a year to get comfortable. My T usually doesn't mention it at all unless he feels I should regulate a bit to calm me down. He has also given me a tissue a couple of times, before Covid.

[daisydid]

I have cried in the past in therapy, but I haven't since I started seeing my current therapist back in September. I have changed therapists a lot over the past few years, and each time I start seeing someone new it takes me a while before I feel comfortable enough to cry. Interestingly enough, I did start to well up in my appointment yesterday, but the moment went as soon as it came.

[Salmon77]

When I started therapy I cried every session almost. Now I tear up sometimes but I don't really lose it very often.

[Taylor27]

I did cry allot when I first saw my ex t the first couple of years, and then it stopped. Now that im feeling more safer with my therapist the tears are starting to come out. I find it's hard to cry because i feel so weak. I would feel allot better if i let that negative word go and let myself cry.

I cry in session now. I feel safe with T to do that. Sometimes I still push the sadness away though or avoid entire topics. It's because I get afraid to feel it, like it will engulf me in a way I can't manage. T reminds me that sadness is not depression so that helps me to open up to it some. He responds well with, silence, empathy and/or words, ideas of comfort. Of course sometimes we go deeper into it.

I think crying in front of someone else can include a trust for them and myself that I'm still working out.

[Rive.]

Unfortunately, I am not a robot

[mrxuneek]

Originally Posted by zoiecat

I have never cried in therapy. My eyes have teared up a bit but I will not allow crying to happen. Actually I should say one of my alters comes out when I am about to cry. She will not let me cry in public and I consider my T public. We have talked about it a bit and he always asks why I will not let myself cry in front of my T. I just tell him no, it is not something that can happen. He says it goes with the job but he still has not convinced me.

To me crying shows weakness and is not allowed. It is just how I was raised.

Thank you for sharing your story

[Mountaindewed]

I cried one time. She almost cried one time when I was first seeing her because she “felt for me” when I saw my last T I downright sobbed one time in a session.

[SalingerEsme]

I cry most sessions, but very rarely in real life. My T calls them "beautiful tears", which makes it better. He's attuned to tears in a nice peaceful way, unlike my first T who was kind of wooden about them.

[Merope]

I never used to at the start, but now it happens pretty frequently.