Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

Hugs, Kit...I replied more in your thread about your T canceling.

Thanks, LT. I sent my T an email of my random thoughts about what the heck happened this morning. (my behavior) but part of the email was about me wanting her too. Then I sent her a text telling her I sent an email. Lol. I'm probably annoying her right now.

Thank you Quietmind2.

As good as I felt yesterday, I feel terrible today. What a difference a day makes. Hmm. Maybe tomorrow will be good again!

I usually don't volunteer 22 hours in a week, that was definitely a stretch! It was hard doing my regular 9 hour a day job and that.

Yes, I hear you about iron deficiency. I had that earlier in the year and I felt like absolute crap. Super fatigued. Took the iron pills and boy did it ever make such the difference.

HUGS kit

TW: Death/funeral talk

HUGS Lost

Thanks, Kit.

Much appreciated, as ever.

HUGS

Hugs, Lost.... I can understand why it would be difficult.

I don't yet have a good answer to the question 'When are you coming back?', so I would rather avoid it altogether.

I woke up at 2 AM with a migraine. Couldn't get back to sleep. It is 11:25 AM and I am getting tired.

Reading mafia history books. For Godfather fans, there is a reason why the scene of Michael in the bathroom at the restaurant is so compelling - it was true! I wrote about it for a college humanities class.

This makes me think of something random that Dr. T shared yesterday. He was using a hypothetical about if he decided he wanted to move to Mexico, that he'd let me know that possibility as soon as he had a sense of it--he's not actually thinking that.

Trigger warning: Kidnapping

No appointment date/time yet from T. Although she did text me to say,

"You are not fine. But you will be okay." And to ask whether I was at home or working.

I don't know where they come up with this kind of stuff. You are not fine but you will be okay. What does that even mean? How does she know if I will be okay or not? I don't even know.

For the record, I am at work, but I am not that engaged in my work today. I did some stuff this morning but I'm kind of "out of it." Dissociated I guess. I took care of the necessary stuff but everything else I am kind of holding back for tomorrow.

Wow, that is kind of an intense random thing. HUGS Kit

No I work for the schizophrenic world of a jesuit university who is quite happy to have your daughter knocked up as long as the church can control women -they are happy. This is more how to ensure student "well being" which I am against - not them having well being -but it being our responsibility to cater to their whining - which is what the complaints have been -oh covid is hard, school is hard, I am unhappy, I don't know how to get along with roommates so can someeone talk to my roommate for me - that sort of crap = the grow the f up and be an adult stuff. But what is behind it is that last year we had like 7 freshmen kill themselves/cause damage to personal structural integrity over the course of the year and they want to project a "we care" image to parents. They really don't care and none of the stuff so far will make any difference because it is all academic double speak for we really don't know what to do but we know we need to look like we are doing something. My cranky old crone take on the situation is that these parents have not prepared their children because they've been constantly helicoptering intervening having play dates etc. these children have never not been supervised by an adult that they always can run to for intervention and they have absolutely no clue how to handle anything on their own. Even my own colleagues some of them act like idiots when it's their kids going to school like they went to the college all the time to check on them. One literally drove 5 hours to make sure their kid went to the infirmary to get some vaccine (not covid it was before that). They call the dean and all kinds of stupid crap. I would have disowned my parents if they had gone to a dean or the president or anything other than coming to see me once a semester after lots of warning and bringing me snacks and then leaving. I liked being on my own and learning to be adult and I really do not understand these student who do not want to be one.

I more would have been more of a why are you wasting my time talking response. Although I would not have cared if either woman was moving to mexico or anywhere else.

stopdog, I have a friend who is a tenured professor at the university I graduated from. We became friends after I graduated. Anyway, she complains because on the main campus they have implemented things like "safe spaces" (I don't know if that is what they are actually called) for the students to go if they are having trouble with their feelings being hurt. And she complains about a lot of the training she has to do now. It's so much more than just diversity training or sexual harassment training. She described the last one to me as being psychobabble "I'm okay, you're okay" sort of stuff. I don't know what all that means, but I probably would not fit in there now. I was the one in the Dean's office complaining that the classes were too easy. Not complaining that they were too hard or that someone hurt my feelings. This friend is constantly trying to get me to get into academia but I don't want to go back to school for my PhD. At least, not at this point in my career. I'm rather sick of school still.

Oh yes I forgot about the safe space crap =that has been going on for awhile. I generally ignore that because I am at the law school not main campus, but it is becoming a thing at the med and law schools now as well. And mindfulness -we have a mindfulness room for example. I have never been to it.

Yeah I think the safe spaces on campus started maybe the year after I got my MBA. I only was on the main campus for one class, International Business. The rest I took at a satellite campus or online. I was surprised by how open the campus was though. I mean anyone can walk on it/in it. Where is the security? That is what I kept thinking. I felt safer at the smaller satellite campus. When I was having lunch at the main campus someone came up to me and was trying to sell me "stuff" I don't think they were a student but maybe. I mean they had a young kid with them so I don't think so but who knows. I didn't report it or anything but if security would have been around I probably would have for the child's sake.

Hmm. Mindfulness room. I wonder what the heck one does in there?

Wow 7 kids. Well whatever the school decides to do, they'd best put it on tik-tok if they want the kids to see and believe it.

Got into another argument with my parents about money I spend.

Also decided to re-apply for SSDI, I have a phone interview scheduled for August 23rd.

Although, I should point out that I am rather paranoid by nature, or genetics. So maybe that is why I felt safer on the smaller campuses. I mean, no one got past that front desk in the satellite campus. If you weren't a student or a professor, that woman would not let you set foot in the hallway.

Yeah isnt a "mindfulness room" called your brain?

So sorry about the argument. I hope the SSDI appointment goes well. HUGS kit

trigger for self harm

HUGS willowtigger. We're here for you.