Couch 249: The Self Care Couch

Once as a professor and once as a student I walked to campus through big storms—which both turned out to be the eye of a hurricane—on the assumption it was just a storm and we had classes. Nope.

I think of what ex-T said once about relationships, though at the time, it was about me and H: How sometimes you need to turn up the heat in a relationship to move it forward--not like in a sexual way, but to express the anger, have a fight, etc. Maybe that's true here? And if it can't survive that, then I imagine it wasn't as strong as it seemed in the first place.

I have never done this -but I do get the nightmares about not finding my class or teaching the wrong group of students or losing all their final exams.

Sure, but back to Ross and Rachel: they were at least in the same relationship. You and Dr T are not--each of you is defining relationship and what it should be differently.

Expressing the anger makes sense in a marriage when you're fighting on basically equal grounds. In this relationship, you're not fighting on equal grounds.

The move out fees is how much we owe the apartment complex for cleaning, paint, carpet, and junk removal. The deposit is the security deposit that only applies to H and I because my dad didn't contribute. H and I owe 2/3 because we're 2 out of 3 people. My dad is responsible for his 1/3.

So move out fees is $2100. Security deposit is $500. And his junk fee is $400. Again, H and I get the security deposit taken off our debt. And dad has to pay for his own junk removal.

So the question is do I remove the security deposit and junk removal fee from our debt and then times 2/3? Or is it reverse?

Sorry this is so confusing!!!

Thanks, Lemon. I think I may do that, possibly keep my next Friday session, but it would still give me a week. And, well, I could decide about that session with 24 hours notice. I can do that with any of them, but I'd rather just say "I need a week--please take me off for Monday and Wednesday" than keep deciding 24 hours in advance.

I'll sleep on it. I don't want to cancel sessions then attempt to reschedule and have nothing be available (especially as one time, he said he was tempted to not reschedule me for spite, but he realized that would be immature).

It also bothered me that at first, he questioned my saying I might be in a major depressive episode. I said I was picking up Zoloft (SSRI) later today, and he was like, "That's for longer-term use, not an acute episode." And I was like, "I think this has been going on for some time." I wanted to be like, "Yes, I'm familiar with Zoloft, moron--I was on it for a few years while I was seeing you in the past."

He did seem more compassionate when I was describing symptoms unrelated to him/the move in the last few months. (Like more trouble sleeping than usual, not feeling enthusiastic about things I generally like to do, lack of motivation and energy, etc.)I said that maybe the stuff with the move was a symptom, not the cause. He seemed to agree about the idea of depression in the end. But should I have to try to convince my therapist that I'm depressed?

Geez, this is getting harder than Archimedes’ Cattle of the Sun problem: Archimedes's cattle problem - Wikipedia

Zoiecat, I think that might be right?

Una, the $400 is already included in the $2100.

Thats a lot of methane! I think we just found the source of global warming!

I thought that was you all by your lonesome?

The daily refried bean brunch has not been helping matters.

LT, I didnt read all the Dr. T posts. I saw the session wasn’t great and how a week away may help you decide what to do going forward. I’m wondering if after the week away..if reducing sessions will help. Like maybe not completely walking away but perhaps only 1 a week. I often wonder if it’s just too much to go more than once a week because then it’s not giving you enough space to process what went on the previous session. Like it’s just endless processing and always just anticipating the next session just a couple of days away. It’s like it doesn’t give you time to just slow down a little before the next one. You know?

@LonesomeTonight, I know R rents office space from Dr T, but I'm not sure that gives him the right to forbid her to work with you!?

If you want to have her as your therapist and she wants to work with you as her client, that should be good enough.

The only downside I can see is maybe the potential for running into him when you're there to see R, that could be awkward perhaps, but if you can live with that, I don't see it as a conflict of interest.

Sent from my SM-A526B using Tapatalk

Oh freudians.

Have you heard of beano?