I want my box.

T and i had really nice sessions this week. On tuesday she told me at the end that she really enjoyed talking to me because she felt we connected

tonight i was excited to go see her. not excited like i usually am, which is like anxious/nervous, i was excited like you would be if you were going to see a friend at their house. Our whole session i felt like i was talking to a friend. In the beginning she opened a bottle of water and smelled it. then she looks at me and says, "do you ever smell water?" i gave her a weird look and was like "nooo" haha. then she went on to explain why she smells water every time. it was so cute.

i dont know if you remember but she had said that shes making me this box and shes going to put stuff in it as my "transitional objects" I've seen the box sitting on her desk and it hasnt moved. I'm afraid to ask her about it, but i really feel like i need it before she goes on vacation next week. But im so afraid to bring it up because she doesnt HAVE to do that for me, she just is because shes the nicest, lovliest, therapist of them all. okay, to me she is. should i ask her about it? what should i do?

it felt so nice to see her tonight. like i said i just felt like i was visiting a friend. but the only difference was..... i got kicked out after an hour.

i miss her...

heh - if it were *me* and *my box*, i'd go over and "pet it" when in her line of sight... to say "this is important to me" but not to actually bring it up. But that's just me and i'm weird that way.

i remember when my (old) t gave me a picture - it was of a girl that looked enough like me, in a red sun dress and she was standing at the edge of a forrest she had just emerged from. she was over looking a valley with a river and uning horses. then past that were mountains and a lovely sky. She said "It's YOU! you've come out of the forrest!!!" SHe saw it and it reminded her of me and she got it for me. *cries*. such things are very special.

Hi bean.

I would ask. Of course, I would do it in a "cute" way such as to say something like this:

T: How are you feeling about my vacation?
Bean: Well, I am feeling really you know, .....
T: I don't know. What are you feeling?
Bean: I dont know
T: What are you afraid of?
Bean: I don't know and I don't care about your stupid vacation
T: I think you DO care
Bean: No I don't...go away and don't come back
T: You know I am coming back
Bean: No, I dont. You hate me!
T: I am coming back and I don't hate you
Bean: (crying)
T; What can help you????
Bean: Nothing (crying)
T: Let's try and think what can help you not feel abandoned by me.
Bean.........um, huh, um, maybe that box you were making for me
(with a click glance to T)
Bean: But, if it is too much, I don't need anything

Will that work?????? LOL

Since she told you she's making you the box (and what a nice thing to do!) then of course, bring it up.. "Remember when you told me you were making a box of transitional objects for me... ?" (Is it done?! Will it be done before you go?!)

Maybe it is sitting there waiting for your voice

I agree with Echoes suggestion krazibean, i don't see that your T would mind as she's making it for you anyway.

a bit of passive agressiveness, eh, riptide?

yea i don't think my T would fall for that...

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Kiya said:
a bit of passive agressiveness, eh, riptide?

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hmm......really? Was it the whole scenario or the quick glance to T that would make you say that.

ok...how about "I want my box, dammit, and you in it!"
That's pretty straight-forward

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krazibean said:
yea i don't think my T would fall for that...

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oh. ok how about this scenario:

T: So let's talk about my vacation.
Bean: I don't really want to talk about it.
T: Why not, Bean?
Bean: Because I really think you should not be leaving me and the fact that you have NOT finished my box tells me you have not prepared to leave.
T: Oh, you are right. I need to finish your box.
Bean: Yeah! And when you are putting stuff in it, squeeze yourself in there too.

haha, riptide. you make me laugh. number 1, my t would never bring something up like that. "so lets talk about my vacation" is not something shed ever say. i would need to bring it up. and even if she did, and i didnt want to talk about it, she'd just say ok and not push me.

oh how i wish she would squeeze herself in that box. if i asked for her to put her picture in there would that be weird? id love to stare at it...

thanks riptide for the scenerio, if only T would follow the script. Looks like I'm going to have to ask myself

I am the queen of not being able to ask my T for stuff directly because I'm afraid of some sort of rejection.

If it were me, I'd probably just start talking about the stuff I want to put in the box-- and then see where that goes.

bean, does her business card have her picture on it???

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krazibean said:

oh how i wish she would squeeze herself in that box. if i asked for her to put her picture in there would that be weird? id love to stare at it...


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This has been done. I read a story that some T's do give out pictures, but they "explore" its meaning with the client. You could ask, but don't be too disappointed if she does not give a picture. I also read that some T's feel that it is too intrusive. Have you searched the internet??? LOL

no her pic is not on her business card, and YES i have searched for her on the internet haha. i google her often but nothing ever comes up except people searches. which i have yet to pay for because i feel like that would be going too far. I have found out the town she lives in and her birthday from that though. as far as a picture, nothing.