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Old Nov 16, 2009, 07:52 PM
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Amanda_1981 Amanda_1981 is offline
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Has anyone here had any success with online dating sites? I have tried one of them that's free but haven't had much success yet. I just seem to have really bad luck in the dating world. Maybe it's because of the way I look, I don't know but I can't seem to find a boyfriend. I thought maybe trying the online dating sites would be more successful but I still find myself not having much luck. It's starting to make me really self conscious and I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever met a guy and get married. I just am not used to approaching guys and I'm not into the whole bar scene and don't really know other ways to find guys except online. I am at a point in my life now where I feel like I'm ready to go back into dating.. I just can't seem to find a guy!

Has anyone here had any successful stories with online dating? Also, any tips on how I can be more active in searching for a guy out in public?

I know people say it will happen when you least except it and if it's meant to be, it will happen eventually... but I feel like at 28, time is running out! I want to get married and have kids before I"m 35. Maybe I'm not doing my profile right on the dating sites... If anyone wants to take a look at it and give me advice on how I can improve it, just email me and I will send you the link to it and would appreciate any feedback.

Thanks!

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  #2  
Old Nov 16, 2009, 08:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amanda_1981 View Post
Has anyone here had any success with online dating sites? I have tried one of them that's free but haven't had much success yet. I just seem to have really bad luck in the dating world. Maybe it's because of the way I look, I don't know but I can't seem to find a boyfriend. I thought maybe trying the online dating sites would be more successful but I still find myself not having much luck. It's starting to make me really self conscious and I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever met a guy and get married. I just am not used to approaching guys and I'm not into the whole bar scene and don't really know other ways to find guys except online. I am at a point in my life now where I feel like I'm ready to go back into dating.. I just can't seem to find a guy!

Has anyone here had any successful stories with online dating? Also, any tips on how I can be more active in searching for a guy out in public?

I know people say it will happen when you least except it and if it's meant to be, it will happen eventually... but I feel like at 28, time is running out! I want to get married and have kids before I"m 35. Maybe I'm not doing my profile right on the dating sites... If anyone wants to take a look at it and give me advice on how I can improve it, just email me and I will send you the link to it and would appreciate any feedback.

Thanks!
They claim it works for some.
Hasn't worked for me ...........so I gave up .
I figure if I was meant to be with someone it will happen.
All I can say is I hope you find someone .
Too stressful for me. I don't need the added stress. LOL
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Depression is not a weakness ...... it is a sign that you have been strong for too long.
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  #3  
Old Nov 16, 2009, 11:29 PM
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lorna lorna is offline
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Don't stress the need for a mate. Like going to a online site may allow you to meet someone you wouldn't have on your own but you probably will have to sift through a lot of frogs first if you know what I mean. Good Luck, it'll come when you least expect it.
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  #4  
Old Nov 17, 2009, 01:03 AM
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jerrymichele jerrymichele is offline
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I would ask your friends to set you up on a blind date. Something else to think about is look for a guy to be your friend first. It's really so much easier to see someone as a friend first instead of bf, and gf. Besides that, when your in a relationship you want to like the person. I have done the love hate thing, and it's just not good at all.
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  #5  
Old Nov 20, 2009, 11:39 AM
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Do they have Habitat for Humanity in Canada?
Do they have Soup Kitchens in Canada?
Do they have Salvation Army in Canada?
Do they have Food Pantries in Canada?
Do they have Forestry replanting in Canada?
Do they have Highway Cleanup in Canada?
Do they have Youth Volunteering in Canada?
Do you get my drift?
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  #6  
Old Nov 20, 2009, 12:21 PM
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babydoll233 babydoll233 is offline
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Hi Amanda,
I feel your pain, I was on line dating after my divorce for a year before I gave up, too exhausting. I gave myself a break and went back on and met my husband in 2005, who lived 1 mile away from me! We are very very happy. There are successes on line and also some bad bad dates. I was feeling very unsure about myself which isnt what it should be about. I was also set up with some nice people thru friends. If you put yourself out there, something will happen, hang in there and keep the faith! Be happy with yourself and it will show! Have a great weekend!
Thanks for this!
Amanda_1981
  #7  
Old Nov 20, 2009, 01:23 PM
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have you tried speed dating? go with a couple of friends and have some fun... good luck with this
  #8  
Old Nov 23, 2009, 11:13 AM
Llana Llana is offline
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i tried online dating too..well its only one month...i met someone interesting but more than 20 yrs older than me.we havent met each other in person and im really worried about it becase we might not like each other when we meet in person..
Thanks for this!
Amanda_1981
  #9  
Old Nov 23, 2009, 01:45 PM
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daytimedreamer daytimedreamer is offline
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I met my fiance on OkCupid, so it's not impossible. I like that site because it has quizzes so you're not just focused on meeting people the whole time you're there. Also, they let you compare quiz results so you can see how you match up on different things. It's fun.
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Amanda_1981
  #10  
Old Nov 23, 2009, 06:36 PM
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Mysterious Mysterious is offline
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I guess it works for some, and for some it just doesn't.
My sister tried online dating sites and she met a few, but none of them were really what she was looking for.
I know you don't want to hear that it'll happen when you least expect it, but it will!
I was not looking for a relationship 5+ years ago, I actually posted something on a site asking for help on my anxiety/social problems.
He messaged me on an instant messanger and we became good friends fast, and in the same month we became a couple. He lived in a completely different state and it was difficult, but now we are together. He's my first and last real life boyfriend...go figure.
So, they can work, but it'll probably happen when you're not expecting it, and maybe not necessarily on a dating website.
Good luck to you!
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  #11  
Old Nov 25, 2009, 01:04 PM
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well....some of my friends found their husbands through online dating....even my older sister and her husband met through online dating around 10 years ago....but all these girls are so pretty...and easy going...at least more than me!!!!
I say don't lose your hope....online dating is a good tool to get connected to others....you even can make friends too....but be careful at the same time...
I have tried couple of times and I failed each time....but I might try again after holidays
take care
Marjan
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Amanda_1981
  #12  
Old Nov 26, 2009, 10:01 PM
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Amanda_1981 Amanda_1981 is offline
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Thank you everyone for your replies! I've been using the site, plentyoffish, and got a message yesterday from this really nice guy who said he is also going through anxiety and panic attacks and his message was so sweet. I am nervous to write back.. I'm worried I'll sound like a dork and scare him off. I haven't dated in a long time (ever sine the weight gain from my meds) and I feel like I don't have that much to offer and keep thinking oh he'll never like me because I'm not a very fun or interesting person. I guess all I can do is hope that I meet a nice guy who wants me for me. Who knows, maybe things will go good with this one guy. I gotta stop being scared and take the plunge!
  #13  
Old Nov 27, 2009, 12:19 PM
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Just be careful of who you are talking to while doing online dating....specially the free ones like plentyoffish.com!
There are some people who are there to get make money and they know how to talk and what to say and they post cute photos....they look real, but they are not....
I was on one of the online datings which you got to pay, I had message from this very cute guy....then when I was chatting with him, I got suspicious and I search his name (the one that he gave me) online....guess what, I found a website complaining about him and saying he's a spam....he had profile in different sites and trying to get girls and tell them how busy he is with his life and he has a daughter and then later on he was asking for money....some girls wrote that they were even talking to him on the phone!!!! hehehe....I found it very quickly and i reported him to the online dating site.....they investigate and deleted him.....
anyway....be brave and go for it but with open eyes....meet in public and don't trust too much....
you look so pretty from your photo....and don't worry about over weight....come on, real women have extra pounds....we can't be model!
I want to try online dating again....I'm tired of being alone and specially that my ex boyfriend found a girl friend very quickly....it's just killing me....
well...see...you are not alone in this process....be brave...

take care
marjan
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  #14  
Old Nov 27, 2009, 05:38 PM
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I have been on an online dating site for a year and have met some wonderful people. I believe that you get, perhaps what you pay for. A free site may attract a lot of people that might not be employed. You definitely want someone who is employed and can add their 50% to the family. You will undoubtedly find someone sooner or later. Try to be patient. i would recommend match.com or e.harmony. good luck!!!!! Remember, it is pretty superficial.
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  #15  
Old Nov 27, 2009, 11:35 PM
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well, I finally wrote a few of the nice guys back. I don't know if they'll respond back, but who knows! Thanks everyone for the tips and support, I appreciate it!
  #16  
Old Nov 28, 2009, 12:26 AM
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Good for you for writing back. You never know when you are going to meet the one fellow for you. Have patience and keep the faith, Amanda.
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  #17  
Old Nov 28, 2009, 03:33 AM
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that's so great...and you inspired me and I opened an account....I just have to post more photos and subscribe!!!! Then I'm good to go....
keep us posted....and don't lose your hope....and enjoy it...
Thanks for this!
Amanda_1981
  #18  
Old Nov 29, 2009, 08:58 PM
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Mysterious Mysterious is offline
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Good luck! Just be yourself and I'm sure you'll do just fine! And like the previous posters said, just be careful.
__________________
My niece is suffering from severe lead poisoning and needs help!
http://fundanna.webs.com/

If you want to help, you can make a donation here:
http://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr...if%3aNonHosted

"Don’t underestimate persons with autism, try to understand.
"

Help find a cure for autism, by supporting the 2009 Polar Plunge that my sister and her husband are participating in!

http://polarplunge.kintera.org/faf/d...upId=238628973

http://polarplunge.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=319752&lis=1&kntae319752=CE91BD1E989B47D18F167F7371D696C0&supId=275402104


My site for Polar plunge:
http://polarplunge2009.tripod.com/2009polarplunge.html

online dating online dating
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  #19  
Old Nov 30, 2009, 06:56 AM
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You could try www.eharmony.com they have a comprehensive questionnaire that takes a couple of hours to fill out and may help you find a suitable match. Also another one I have heard of is: www.match.com Don't know too much more about these. Have also heard of www.plentyoffish.com and www.chemistry.com How about Christian Singles dating if you are interested in this kind of thing.
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  #20  
Old Nov 30, 2009, 06:57 AM
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Plenty of Fish is free of charge!
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  #21  
Old Dec 01, 2009, 12:06 PM
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I used Plenty of Fish a few times. It's easy to use which is probably its biggest plus.

I've had both good and bad experiences with internet dating. The good is that it's pretty easy to start talking to someone. Their interests are right there in the open as is what they are looking for so you won't waste your time striking up a conversation with someone who's 1. Not your type. 2. Looking for something totally different. And being that your initial contact is through an email, there isn't any pressure of trying to carrying on an interesting conversation right then and there.

The negative side though is you don't know who you are talking to. Most people use internet handles and not their names and it's usually not a requirement to include a picture (or the person can use a false picture). That's why it's important to talk to a person a few times before setting up a face to face meeting and meeting in a very public place (and letting someone know where you'll be). Use your intuition-if something doesn't feel right...it probably isn't. And when you find out the person's full name...google it (or run a back ground check). I started dating someone, after a few comments he made I got the impression that something wasn't right...did a quick google search and found out that my hunch was correct.
  #22  
Old Dec 04, 2009, 09:53 PM
moiisha moiisha is offline
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You should not be tired? Meet new people, have new friends! There are other ways to find and meet your future boyfriend, on-line dating is just one path... Join different social events like dances, golf, church events, book clubs or enroll in cooking classes, etc. You can meet there someone that shares the same interest with you, keep the conversation light to have a chance of seeing him again, and entice him to have a date.
  #23  
Old Dec 06, 2009, 06:04 PM
jamjam jamjam is offline
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My brother met his second wife online and they are very happy together. I've tried and so far it hasn't worked well for me. The women I like never respond to me, and the ones that do contact me are generally not so good.

Still, I occasionally get a date out of it, and some of those aren't too bad and a nice break from the routine. I still hope it will eventually pan out.
  #24  
Old Dec 06, 2009, 11:25 PM
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Christina86 Christina86 is offline
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Oh, what a timely topic for me!!

I signed up for POF probably over two weeks ago now. As of this Friday, I was asked out on a date.

Two things that are stopping me from accepting this date proposal: He is ELEVEN (11!) years older than I am (I'm not sure if people from different times in their lives is something I want to get into really) and he's not religious, and I am.

But other than that, he's a very different person than the other guys who I've met through the site... from those who start messages with "Hey baby" (BLECH) to asking about sex and "hooking up" to even one guy who professed that he wasn't employed, that he sold illicit drugs for a living!

Most of them have been horrible spellers and bad grammar to boot. I don't like being the grammar freak, but if you cannot spell simple words then you're either lazy (which is sad, considering a browser like Firefox does spellcheck FOR YOU) or you've got a learning impediment of some kind. I'm betting that most of the men I've met have been the former, not the latter.

So I suppose I've not had any luck yet... but on the other hand, one of my friends got married to a wonderful man that she met through POF and he's pretty much great and they've now celebrated over a year of marriage.

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  #25  
Old Dec 07, 2009, 12:32 PM
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marjan marjan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Christina86 View Post
Oh, what a timely topic for me!!

I signed up for POF probably over two weeks ago now. As of this Friday, I was asked out on a date.

Two things that are stopping me from accepting this date proposal: He is ELEVEN (11!) years older than I am (I'm not sure if people from different times in their lives is something I want to get into really) and he's not religious, and I am.

But other than that, he's a very different person than the other guys who I've met through the site... from those who start messages with "Hey baby" (BLECH) to asking about sex and "hooking up" to even one guy who professed that he wasn't employed, that he sold illicit drugs for a living!

Most of them have been horrible spellers and bad grammar to boot. I don't like being the grammar freak, but if you cannot spell simple words then you're either lazy (which is sad, considering a browser like Firefox does spellcheck FOR YOU) or you've got a learning impediment of some kind. I'm betting that most of the men I've met have been the former, not the latter.

So I suppose I've not had any luck yet... but on the other hand, one of my friends got married to a wonderful man that she met through POF and he's pretty much great and they've now celebrated over a year of marriage.


oh...about the bad spelling....there is this guy from online dating who wants to meet me, but I'm kinda icky to call him even....he spells "talk", "taik"!!!!!! first I thought it might be just a simple mistake, but now sure that it's not just a mistake, he keeps emailing me and saying "we should taik"!!!! well...I haven't called him yet and it's been a while....I don't think I really want to talk to him or taik to him...hehehehe....
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