[LittleForgetMeNot]

Some girl added me a few moments ago (I really hope it's not anyone on here or else I'll feel really stupid). People adding me randomly, without any hint of their name in their address, sends me off into an anxiety attack. I always think it's Rachel come back to torment me because 99% of the time it is (there has only ever been two random e-mail adds that weren't related to her in anyway).

I asked her who she was. Her DN had no hint to her identity and neither did the DP.. Well actually the DP was a picture of an emoticon that Rachel used an aweful lot (maybe I'm just paranoid). She didn't tell me at first, she only said "oh hi" which was Rachel's usual greeting (I'm probably just paranoid) so I asked her again. She said she was some girl named Selena? I told her I knew no one by Selena and asked her where she got my address from. I thought she might have been from here (that's why I'm gonna say sorry now if it was) since my e-mail is on display (I should probably take that off). She only said she thought this was her friend's address.. and I just thought to myself, how often does that really happen for that to be a valid excuse?

Then she asked me who I was and I didn't answer. Instead I was freaking out to my friend who knew Rachel. I was telling him what was going on and he too had come to the conclusion that it was probably her (so I'm not crazy?). She asked me again and instead of answering, instead of continuing the conversation and letting it lead to introductions and "friendship", I told her because we didn't know each other I was just gonna delete her and I did without waiting for her response.

Now I have no idea if that was her or not, but Rachel has a history of finding ways of getting back in touch with me and it's usually never direct. Most of the time she'll have a friend of her's add me and she'll get on that account and talk to me. Once before she came up to me saying she had amnesia and because she pulled it off convincingly (or because I was just stupid) I believed her and "helped" her.. some how..

I don't understand why she does this. She says she hates me! She stole my boyfriend and got him to cheat on me for 2 months with her! She said I was a horrible person and I deserve everything I get; that she wants to teach me a lesson; she only does things to mess with my head.. But why, why if she hates me so much, can't she leave me alone!!!? It's been three years! I'm tired of being stalked and obsessed over.. Really.. Enough is enough!

I wish there was a way the average joe could block IP addresses.. and that I knew what her's was so I could block it.

[Belle1979]

((((littleforgetmenot))))

you are not crazy or paranoid.. if it was a genuine person then they would have told you who they were...

take a deep breath and relax my sweet.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Littleforgetmenot

Hon I think you did the right thing. I had a feeling it was her trying to rope you in just to pull the rug out from under you. I may be wrong and that would be the best thing in the world, but there are times when caution and discernment are better than laying your self open to something which might not be genuine.

There are core elements of a personality that never change, one of them is the written form of communication. Greetings, core inferences and core representative images rarely change and very rarely alter in any way. Some people who feel omnipotent and feel that they are too clever to be caught are arrogant in their projections and so use clues which they do not believe you would pick up on. You have been hurt enough by that girl and you don't deserve it.

Maybe I am over cautious because someone who is a total mad person had her friend try to befriend me after I had deleted her. What she didn't realise is that I'm not quite totally brainless and knew this girl was her best friend.

Always best to err on the side of caution, that way you are protected, take care,

Rhiannon

[LittleForgetMeNot]

I've made many mistakes in the past by letting Rachel talk it out with me. I would sit there and let her plea, let her say what she had to say. On many occasions however I would dismiss her after she said everything and go back to my business without befriending her again. Though there were those few times she managed to get me back, I don't really remember how, or why I would give in, but it happened too many times.

I have a feeling that sometime, sooner or later, maybe even tomorrow, she'll try again. I don't know why she tries. Usually it is after she has left the guy she took. When she took Steven, she didn't properly try to rekindle our friendship until a few months after, which was when she pulled the anmesia excuse out of her hat. When she first went with Jesse, she didn't try to talk to me again until a few weeks- months after that as well. The last time I spoke to her, before all of this happened, was in August, days after she started getting Jesse to cheat.

The fact that she is trying to come back in some way makes me think she has left Jesse and is now going to bring up some excuse to me (if I let her) on why she did it. She thinks I'm stupid, and that I'll forgive her again. But she doesn't know, that I might have forgiven her so many times, I'm not stupid. I might be forgiving and foolish, but stupid is one of the things I'm not. I give her chances, knowing that in the end she's gonna mess it up. I only let her prove to me, again and again, why I dislike her, why I don't want to be her friend. A lot of people don't understand why because they know her personality and is her friend and they just think 'Rachel isn't like that' so I just say, well okay then, you can have your way and I'll be her "friend" but you watch, in a few months, you'll see why I didn't want to be in the first place. And it happens. It happened to the friend I mentioned earlier; he used to be her friend more than mine, he used to really like her and think of her as an amazing person and would always try to make us friends again. Now he sees because he was there for every moment of this situation and he's just disgusted.

Rachel really does think I'm stupid. She thinks she's smart and is the greatest liar on earth. She's admitted she lies all the time as if she is proud of it, and the traumatic stories she tells.. they're so out there that no one would ever believe her.. I mean I usually do believe people when they say stuff like that because it's pretty serious.. but with her you'll listen and you think, something clicks and you're just like "wait that doesn't make sense at all". She thinks she is mature as any 15+ year old, but she's only 12 (13 tomorrow) and not to be all full of myself or anything but she just can't compete with me on that level.

She can't hide her personality like she thinks she can. I've known her for three years now, she can't pretend and fool me. Her methods are repeatitive: be Paula's friend, find out if she has boyfriend, hate boyfriend until she breaks up, if that fails steal boyfriend, make Paula hate him and me, after a few weeks break up with her boyfriend, come back and make things good. That's her plan. Always. Sometimes it's with somone else doing the stealing, but the basics are the same.

I just wish sometimes I knew the cause for this. I mean I know it's jealousy. I had Jesse come back those few days and complain to me for hours how insecure she is about him talking to me, how she is always saying I'm better at her at everything. I had the friend that spoke with her tell me it was jealousy and even Rachel, at times, would indirectly say that she was jealous and insecure because of me. I don't think these things, I don't think I'm better than her. I never ever wanted to accept that anyone could be jealous of me.. I just think we're two different people on different levels in different places.. But.. I don't know, I always feel like it's more to it than just jealousy. That answer seems so simple..

Do people really go that far and for so long over people who they're jealous of? Like I would think that if she hated me so much and I made her feel so bad, she would be happy that we're not talking.. You know.. instead of looking and finding me and trying to be my friend??

I am actually 100% sure now that it was Rachel. I checked the msn profile she added me with a little while after I posted this and I was the only one she added. The account is extremely new as well as if it was made today.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

I noticed i seem to make a novel out of every post I make. sorry about that!

[Aunt Donna]

Originally Posted by LittleForgetMeNot

I noticed i seem to make a novel out of every post I make. sorry about that!

That is okay. It helps us understand the situation completely.

can you talk to your parents about this? maybe they could phone her parents and tell them their daughter is harassing you. you shouldn't have to deal with this and i'm sorry you do. try not to chat with or add people to your social media sites you don't know irl.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

That's good.. I'm usually faced with people who are scared of a giant wall of text, but it's a habit of mine to explain and over explain.. I wanna be an author so I guess that's why.

Rachel's ex came on facebook about an hour ago and it sparked more irritance over this issue. I asked him if she had done this before, to someone other than me. He said he thinks she's done this about two other times.

The more I think about it the more it doesn't make sense and the more it doesn't make sense the more I want it to. At the moment that need for it to make sense is getting so high up there that I'm contemplating on letting said friend above to talk to this girl like he wanted to. Such as add the e-mail address and figure out things instead of me doing it. I didn't want it at the time but now.. I dunno. I know it does nothing and I know she won't ever tell me the truth.. but parts of me wants to know what she did with Jesse? Even though looking for him or talking to him (unless he talks to me first???) is against my promise for at a whole nother year, I can't help but wonder..

[LittleForgetMeNot]

Originally Posted by bloom3

can you talk to your parents about this? maybe they could phone her parents and tell them their daughter is harassing you. you shouldn't have to deal with this and i'm sorry you do. try not to chat with or add people to your social media sites you don't know irl.

Well I met her three years ago on a MMORPG. I didn't add her on msn or facebook for an extremely long time. It was about a year or so before I finally did so I thought she could be trusted? I dunno, I was 12 so I wasn't really thinking all that well and it was my first time interacting with online people.. Naive little me thought all people could be trusted..

My Dad knows all about this, so much about it that it irritates him when something new related to her is brought up. He keeps asking me why I'm still associated with her after so long and I have to keep insisiting that it's not me, it's her. He has witnessed my many tears over the years, my frusteration and anxiety when it comes to her. When I told him about her trying to get back he actually told me something similar to what you said. He said: "This is why you don't add people on the internet cause you dont know what kind of weirdos are out there"

She lives in the USA. In Michigan, I think, and I live in Ontario, Canada. I don't have her number and if I did calling her parents might be a bit odd.

Originally Posted by LittleForgetMeNot

She lives in the USA. In Michigan, I think, and I live in Ontario, Canada. I don't have her number and if I did calling her parents might be a bit odd.

i'm really glad your dad knows about this.

if you have her first and last name then you can do a people search and hopefully find out her home phone number. i really think her parents would want to know what she's up to but your dad would be the one to talk to them. i know it would be awkward but you need her out of your life and she sounds like she needs help because she's really out of control with how she's been after you.

another option is if you have your dad talk to someone who is knowledgeable about internet security they might be able to block her from your computer. i wouldn't have your friend talk to her. it would be better to cut off any communication to her altogether so she'll eventually move on. more communication, even thru someone else, will just encourage her to continue. she sounds sick and needs help. there is no sense to her behavior so trying to make it make sense probably won't work.

Originally Posted by LittleForgetMeNot

I wish there was a way the average joe could block IP addresses.. and that I knew what her's was so I could block it.

how to find the ip address of an email sender try the other linked articles if that one doesn't have what you need

how to block an ip address from your computer try the other articles linked if that one doesn't have the right details for your system

you could also contact your ISP (internet service provider) and i bet they could block her from your computer.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

Originally Posted by bloom3

i'm really glad your dad knows about this.

if you have her first and last name then you can do a people search and hopefully find out her home phone number. i really think her parents would want to know what she's up to but your dad would be the one to talk to them. i know it would be awkward but you need her out of your life and she sounds like she needs help because she's really out of control with how she's been after you.

another option is if you have your dad talk to someone who is knowledgeable about internet security they might be able to block her from your computer. i wouldn't have your friend talk to her. it would be better to cut off any communication to her altogether so she'll eventually move on. more communication, even thru someone else, will just encourage her to continue. she sounds sick and needs help. there is no sense to her behavior so trying to make it make sense probably won't work.

I've given up on that whole idea of getting my friend to talk to her. I reminded myself that in the moment I didn't want it, and in that moment I was truely thinking of what I really wanted, I had the honest feelings come back (the anger and anxiety) when she added me. I was only thinking about it now when I had calmed down, but letting someone figure it out for me would just make me feel those things again which isn't what I really want.

The thing is that I've tried to cut off all communication all together a lot. I hadn't spoken to her since August until recently when I found out about her and Jesse in October. Before August I think the last time I spoke to her was around April or May when she went with Jesse the first time. Before that I kept contact with her from, probably september or october until then. Beofre that, it was May. So there are big gaps between contact and she always manages to get back to me some how.. Though half of that is my fault for letting her.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

Starting to feel restless, and a little anxious about Rachel again. I'm worried she's gonna add me but I'm getting that annoying feeling of wanting to go talk to her. It seems to only come around at night.. I feel good and free during the day but now..

[LittleForgetMeNot]

What I think is.. If I had no boyfriend, no guy she could get to, no one she knew of that I liked, we would be fine. She always gets so.. agressive when it comes to guys and me. And the thing is was that before she started trying to tear Jesse and I apart and before she tried to get with Steven and those months we first met and those months between guys, we had it great.

I mentioned this in a previous post, but when we had it good we had it great. We would talk for hours on end, laughing so much. We were two peices of a puzzle that fit perfectly at the time. We liked the same things and thought the same things and we used to go on about how our friendship was better than anything else in the world. We used to be (what someone had said before) lovers without the romance. She would phone me when I was crying and wouldn't leave until I stopped..

She didn't seem to be a stalker, crazy, obsessive person.. she seemed real and genuine.. and I miss this friend with every part of my whole entire body, but I resent the toxic being she has become.. It's so hard to accept her this way. Hard to tell myself that this is who she really is.. and realize that she's not going to change because there is something wrong with her..

[LittleForgetMeNot]

*sigh* so i got a fb add from another girl. no other friends again, and idk who she is. I assume it's rachel. My fb is set so only friends of friends can find me, and facebook has that default to where people with ur e-mail address can find u too. well this girl is most certainly not a friend of a friend.

I'm in the middle of confirming and ignoring. I dunno what to do really. I know that its stupid to be on the fence but i'm wondering wth she wants?