improper English

I had the most wonderful english teacher 10th - 12th grade ... She taught us proper english, but she also taught us that wherever we ended up in life, we would pick up certain words, phrases and habits that weren't by the book ... It's okay she said, In your heart you know you've learned it right and thus will apply it so when necessary ... And, you know what? ... She was absolutely right.

I can type up the most professional looking letter with all that proper spelling, grammar, punctuation and diction when it's required.

Other than that I just relax and let it my natural southern english and drawl go wherever it wants to go y'all ... !!!

Completely agree. With all the texting and emailing, etc. now, English teachers have to spend a great deal of time discussing the difference between formal and informal language and when each is appropriate or necessary. I teach AP Language and Comp., and working with colloquial language, jargon, etc., is just part of what we do. We also see how what was "proper" English language in the 1600 or 1700's would be considered rather atrocious grammar today. Language changes, verbal and written language are two completely different animals, and we don't all have to be walking grammar books in our communication at all times. The trick is to be able to use formal language/grammar when it truly "counts".

So I think this man has made another faux pas. He asked for my dress size. I was taken aback but provided the answer. He said that it is his preferred size. Isn't it impolite to ask this question? Isn't it worse than "less people"? Would he ask for my cup size next, by logical extension??

Opinions?

Now THAT is definitely questionable.

Thanks, Farmergirl, I am glad I can bounce ideas off you and not be alone with it.

Would make me think twice actually.. I hope you asked him his penis size.

LOVE IT PFROG!!!!

Hamster-bamster, this is WAY worse that "less people"!!!! Sounds down right creepy to me!

I did not because I am not as smart and sharp as you are. But now that you told me I know what my retort would be next time it happens. What would be a good answer in inches? I hope though that there will be no next time.

Why didn't he just say no fat chicks? I would not ask for penis size. That may take the conversation places you don't want it to go. Idk 2 hours is a long ways away. He may feel like you owe him something? Since I got a new phone I have signed up again too. My favorite smart guy so far just says he doesn't do distance.

I did not ask him - he found me, so the distance is his problem, not mine.

The next gem is a 34-year-old Indian guy from Delhi (now, from Fremont CA) complimenting me on being, OMG, voluptuous. All I posted is a very professional looking headshot, no curves (I do have them but I do not show them). So... I challenged him. He cited his wild imagination and said that he hopes that I like men with wild imagination. Now what do I do with THAT???

On the plus side I have a date on Tuesday with a guy my age with flawless English, without any show of wild imagination, without improper questions, without any impropriety for that matter, and with a username along the lines of "avid UNIX user" so he is a geek which is OK with me.

So it is not all bad.

I was trying to maintain a completely neutral chat conversation with the Indian guy and mentioned that I have three cats. He asked if I want a horny dog. I asked if all young Indian men are so forward with sexual jokes. He said that he only knows about himself - others, I would have to explore. This was pretty much the end of the Indian guy. And here I was so open to the possibility of an interracial r/s. But I won't tolerate off-color jokes in the name of interracial exploration. That is OK, there will be decent Indian men for me down the line, I am sure.

HB, Run Forrest Run! What a jerk!
R

OK, Rose, I will ban him now!

All the people who have contacted me since I banned those two guys have been decent. So for now I will just write those two off as aberrations.

That's providing of course, you carry on talking to them! It takes two to have a conversation, grins.

Sorry, am not smart, am just plain rude! I do like occasionally pointing out people's rudeness (him asking you a personal question) with rudeness, sometimes it makes them stop and think. Only sometimes tho!!

Good luck with your dating, and I hope meeting all those people, the nice ones and the, well, lets say, quirky ones is enjoyable! I find people interesting, even if not quite my cup of tea '-)

I did a public service. I emailed him:

I have put in a filter on your email address in my GMAIL and have blocked you in my OkCupid application. This is because I did not like the question about my dress size. I found the question rude and impolite. What would have been the next question, by logical extension - "what is your cup size?"?

I am writing to you about it to give you feedback in order to make you more successful with your next prospect.

I am new to the dating scene and I was unsure as to whether my reaction to your question was justified. So I posted an inquiry on a online message board where I have friends who are more experienced and mature. They unanimously voted to block you. So I am not alone feeling that the question about the dress size is inappropriate.

Cheers,
H-B

Sorry I posted my reply without reading your last remark. Glad you blocked him though.

Please be safe!

Hamster,

I agree with your decision to ban the Indian guy AND the "Dress Size" man. That being said, I hope you will keep in mind that common grammar mistakes are common in today's society. If you eliminate all potential suitors that don't speak/spell correctly, you will have a small dating pool. It seems, in this day and age, you are lucky to find someone that doesn't write in 'text format' (cuz, wuz, etc).

From a guy's perspective, keep your 'creep radar' active but give the rest of us a break, okay?

Deal! Will do.

I am now chatting with a super polite East Indian guy who came to the US from Sydney. Extra polite... extra considerate of my time... perfect grammar... no writing in text format even though we communicate via chat, etc. etc.

So I hope that Indian guy with off-color jokes, the one whom I banned, was simply an aberration as far as Indian guys go.

Am sure he is. I don't think you can generalise too much - there are sleazbags from all walks of life! Sadly.

I hope its going well with the guy from Sydney!

I am meeting the guy from Sydney for lunch on Monday. I am just afraid that he will be too nice for me - I unfortunately am not attracted to people who treat me nicely.

Go figure!

I hope you don't mind me saying, but you seem to be developing a bit of a list of things you don't like about people before you've given them a chance. Being nice is great, as long as they are not dull! But being treated well by a nice fella.. what's wrong with that? Bad boys are fun, but not good for longevity.