[CastlesInTheAir]

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

I've told this dude only friends a billion times ....

I've even told him I'm "involved" with someone.

At the time if it were possible I would have had to keep myself from slapping the ***** out of him.

Am I wrong for being annoyed?

[CaptainChaos79]

men will always act boorish. As women we must knock **** out of them occasionally

I hate guys like that. Like. "Excuse you, you disgusting buttface I am not a piece of meat."

You should be annoyed. If someone said that to me I would kick him in the youknowwhere so hard. It is not a compliment and you should tell him that. It's harassment to be honest. I wouldn't be friends with someone like that tbh :/ it leaves a nasty feeling in the pit of my stomach because it's just so disrespectful and gross.

If my husband sent it to me, I'd take it as a lighthearted joke, and laugh.

If some guy at the office sent it to me, I'd be totally creeped out.

Somebody I'm casually dating... yeah, that might set off alarm bells.

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

It's inappropriate when you have told him many times that you are not interested.

It also smacks of a man who is not taking responsibility for his behaviour; instead he has pinned the blame on you for being so 'sexy', which is not fair on you at all because you do not ask to be treated this way.

Warn him that you will report him for sexual misconduct, then if he continues, report him.

[A Red Panda]

It's definitely inappropriate. Unless you've been involved or have shown interested in being involved with him, then it's totally not cool for him to talk like that.

I've known guys like that. After I've had enough of saying "stop that", then I just cut them out.

I once had a guy, who I was friends with for years.... we'd lost touch (because I was always annoyed at him being inappropriate). I reconnected with him like four years later... and within two conversation he'd ALREADY restarted behaving the same. So I cut him back out pretty quickly.

Originally Posted by CaptainChaos79

men will always act boorish. As women we must knock **** out of them occasionally

Thanks for lumping men into this giant horrible group. That is quite negative and a stereotyping statement.

I am nothing like that.

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

I've told this dude only friends a billion times ....

I've even told him I'm "involved" with someone.

At the time if it were possible I would have had to keep myself from slapping the ***** out of him.

Am I wrong for being annoyed?

You have every right to be annoyed. it is not only disrespectful but just plain rude. I don't get men that think women find it attractive for men to come onto them overtly sexual. AFAIK most women want a gentleman as friends and lovers.

Even if you were single, it would be totally inappropriate to talk to you that way. So in this case he is completely out of line in that not only have you told him friends only but that you're already involved. Why even keep in touch with such an ignoramus?

[CastlesInTheAir]

I actually ignored him when he sent that, and even told him it wasn't much of a compliment. The weird thing was he didn't know why it wasn't.

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

The weird thing was he didn't know why it wasn't.

Because he's an idiot that objectifies women? Honestly this guy ain't even worth being around. His repeated sexual come ons with you is really harrassment no matter how you look at it. "not understanding" is not an excuse for him to continue doing it.

I really suggest you cut him off as a friend.

[CastlesInTheAir]

Thanks.....

[wife22]

I've been called uptight just because of declining "sweetheart" epithet from a colleague,but I do believe the only men who has right to call me sweetheart is my husband and any other signs of affection,even friendly,or touch (I've seen rubbing shoulders ) or texts,I consider disrespectful and inappropriate .Some men have no sense of boundaries and respect .Your feelings are justified

[Dionysius]

Couldn`t agree more, s4andm4n2600, he seems to think that if he keeps this up she will give in. She is better off without "friends" like him.

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

I've told this dude only friends a billion times ....

I've even told him I'm "involved" with someone.

At the time if it were possible I would have had to keep myself from slapping the ***** out of him.

Am I wrong for being annoyed?

I'd view it, as degrading. And, it's really crossing lines of respect, because you've asked him to stop. He's taking advantage of 'friend' status, and pressuring you, in a way that says he's only being your friend because he views you as sexy and it arouses him, evidently.

What causes you, to not just walk completely away? Ignoring, a man like this, doesn't solve anything. And clearly, saying no doesn't either.

What's tugging at your heart strings with this one? (I don't mean romantic heart strings, but the heart strings, of wanting someone undeserving of you and your friendship, in your life?)

[hvert]

I agree with the poster above--- this guy's interest in you goes way beyond friendship and he just doesn't understand that you aren't interested. It sounds like he thinks you will eventually change your mind.

Cutting off or scaling back contact will send a clear message that you aren't interest and hopefully give him the distance he needs to get over his crush.

[BadAtLove]

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

I've told this dude only friends a billion times ....

I've even told him I'm "involved" with someone.

At the time if it were possible I would have had to keep myself from slapping the ***** out of him.

Am I wrong for being annoyed?

I think that's inappropriate. I can't imagine pursuing a woman with a life line that. I've been a dog before, but only in the heat of romance when emotions are flaring with a girl I'm actually seeing.

I would be very annoyed. In fact, I've had girls I've had girls get "creepy" after one date and been instantly disinterested.

[kyle Kerlew]

You're not wrong for being annoyed, just reiterate to him that you're involved with someone and maybe ask him to please not say things like that to you.

If it makes you uncomfortable, ask him to stop. Laughing it off will just leave him to say something like it again some time in the future because he'll think it's okay.

Edit: Reading all of your replies, I really don't think it's necessary to hit him at all. Sure, it might solve the problem, but I don't think it's right to hit anyone.

[CastlesInTheAir]

Lol I would never hit anyone, that was more of a figure of speech

Originally Posted by keeprolling

I hate guys like that. Like. "Excuse you, you disgusting buttface I am not a piece of meat."

You should be annoyed. If someone said that to me I would kick him in the youknowwhere so hard. It is not a compliment and you should tell him that. It's harassment to be honest. I wouldn't be friends with someone like that tbh :/ it leaves a nasty feeling in the pit of my stomach because it's just so disrespectful and gross.

So you think it's appropriate to use violence over some immature comment? I suggest you go seek some anger management if you're serious.

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Would you take this as a compliment or would you view it as somewhat degrading and also question thier intent as only sexual? Or have I gotten too uptight?

He sent me this "I'm not always horny, you're just really sexy."

Or am I supposed to just laugh it off?

I've told this dude only friends a billion times ....

I've even told him I'm "involved" with someone.

At the time if it were possible I would have had to keep myself from slapping the ***** out of him.

Am I wrong for being annoyed?

I think you are overreacting. He makes immature comments. All you need to do is tell him " look we're friends, but I don't like these sexual comments because I'm involved with someone else and you're making me feel uncomfortable, and I would appreciate it as a friend if you stop unwanted compliments".

That should be enough for him to get the message. If he persists with the silly remarks then cut him off as a friend. It's not rocket science what you need to do here. But getting worked up over his silly remarks isn't going to solve anything.

[CastlesInTheAir]

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

I think you are overreacting. He makes immature comments. All you need to do is tell him " look we're friends, but I don't like these sexual comments because I'm involved with someone else and you're making me feel uncomfortable, and I would appreciate it as a friend if you stop unwanted compliments".

That should be enough for him to get the message. If he persists with the silly remarks then cut him off as a friend. It's not rocket science what you need to do here. But getting worked up over his silly remarks isn't going to solve anything.

Not really "worked" up over it. However, I was more or less pointing out whether or not I should see the comment as a signal of his intent to treat me like a sexual object.

Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir

Not really "worked" up over it. However, I was more or less pointing out whether or not I should see the comment as a signal of his intent to treat me like a sexual object.

Well considering you were annoyed to the extent to want the slap the **** out him, I would so you're are/were getting pretty worked up by it.

His comment could imply one of the other. He could just see you as a sexual object or he could see you as sexy yet also like you as a person. Since he's your friend I'd like to assume it was the latter. You know you can find someone sexy and not just think of them as a sex object.

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

So you think it's appropriate to use violence over some immature comment? I suggest you go seek some anger management if you're serious.

It is a bit extreme but I am guessing it's just more expressing the sheer level of annoyance more than something to be taken literally.

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

I think you are overreacting. He makes immature comments. All you need to do is tell him " look we're friends, but I don't like these sexual comments because I'm involved with someone else and you're making me feel uncomfortable, and I would appreciate it as a friend if you stop unwanted compliments".

That should be enough for him to get the message. If he persists with the silly remarks then cut him off as a friend. It's not rocket science what you need to do here. But getting worked up over his silly remarks isn't going to solve anything.

I was under the impression that she'd already told him which is why I replied like i did anyway but initially I would say you're correct that this should be done first.