Abandoned

Hello,
I have this problem that I have had with relationships for as long as I can remember. I need to be with the person I am dating whenever I can. If they are not at work or sleeping I feel like I need to be with them or I feel abandoned and devastated. I have no idea why this is so and I struggle with it everyday.
It has gotten better. I am with a great guy now and we are getting engaged soon but everyday I fight to know that if he has something to do it does not reflect on how he feels about me.
Why am I doing this? What is wrong with me? It is so frustrating and I feel like it is destroying me.

Jessica

You are in this snowglobe. It is encovered in glass and secure. But one day someone comes and shakes the globe and the pieces go flying everywhere. Now they will eventually settle but they won't be the way they were before and they can never be that way again.

Hey Girl

Have you talked to anyone about this? The need to have someone around you all that time.......I don't know what it was to cause this feeling, I have a friend who is going through some abandonment issues from her parents getting divorced at age 6. We think that is the issue cause she never mourned for her parents serperated she was TOO fine for that.

She is at a stage where she feels she needs someone to be there, to feel loved ect..

I don't know if it's a love thing or not for you, and I don't want to say anything else for now incase I'm totally going in the opposite direction here.

Take care hon.

<font color=red>~Sundance~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>

Your father left you when you were six, and died when you were thirteen. Fathers are the role models for the men who follow.

I think that's the abandonment issue you are dealing with now. It has nothing to do with the man you are seeing, or the man you might be seeing in the future, it's all about your father.

I suggest you find a peer counselor or someone you can talk to about this, whether it be a therapist, psychologist, or even reading up on the subject. If you have never come to terms with the feelings you have inside you about how it made you feel when you were six and thirteen, then you need to take the time to express yourself. Perhaps starting a journal called "My Father: What he meant to me then, and what he means to me now."

You may have submerged these feelings because they are so painful. You may have put it out of your mind because you don't want to think about it.

Fathers are amazingly important in a girl's life, no matter what she tells herself. Fathers are our roots, our heritage, our sense of who we are.
You need to get to the bottom of all the feelings that lie dormant inside you regarding this issue. Until you do this, the men in your life will be playing out these issues for you, without even knowing it.

Choices, it's all about choices.