Does anyone feel attracted to someone WAY older than you??

I prefer older men than boys around my age, like teenagers. I guess this is normal, but the reason I think so is because teen boys seem like childish creatures. Don't get me wrong: there are some nice boys out there that I would become friends with, but I prefer the sensible goofballs or the mature but pleasing popular figures like Will Smith . I also have crushes on Aaron Goodwin from "Ghost Adventures" (38 years), a mini attraction for the Slipknot singer Corey Taylor (40 years), and another guy (49 years) who I don't want to mention here. He's a voice actor, and he's handsome~ x3

I'm not like this all the time... okay, most of the time. Not only men, but boys about a few years older than me are also on my preferences (like around 18-21 years).

Does anyone feel like this? Preferring older people that result with extreme age differences?

It sounds pretty normal what you're describing. I was attracted to men when I was a teenager more than those my age, too (being a female). This seemed to be the general trend of my friends as well, especially with celebrities, and it's a pretty common social commentary on women in general.

However, when we're talking extreme age differences, I once developed a massive crush on a man that was 44 years older than me! Now that was awkward.

My life partner is 24 yrs older than me :-)
And we have been together over 15 yrs.
Go with what you want instead of what society tries to tell you.
But remember to stay safe physically. Older guys can be harmful if they are abusers who hide that from you until they get what they want.
Bottom line is know YOU first. And go from there for the rest....

sorry, I think young women looking for older men are looking for something that was missing from their Dad. He's going to get old way before you and you are going to hate it. IMHO anyway.
P.S. that is my story anyway!

I've always liked older men. I started dated men 20 years older than me when I was 20. I am 35 and I still like men 10-20 yrs older...that being said you are 16 so maybe wait until you are an adult to start dating adults for both your sakes.
And for the record...I think men of my generation are jackasses so I don't have dad issues I have I wanna find someone more like my dad issues...

I've personally, years ago, drawn line at 20 year difference marker. .ironically bf is 12 years older, ex husband was also 12 years older.
I've been seriously involved previously with someone five years older and before that 10months younger.

It depends on two people. May/December relationships, aren't that uncommon. I know of a great deal of them. Usually closer to decade difference, for many. I do know of at least one cougar age relationship in my quasi circle...

Compatibility matters more than age.

If involved with an older man, be careful that they treat you as equal, and not bossy/paternal figure.


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Well yeah, the first date I just described in the "Yucky date" thread was with someone 18 years older. He was 53... but he was ex-military and HOT!

My fiance is about 13 years older than me. We are completely happy with one another despite the age difference. Definitely be careful as the male may not have your best interests at heart. However, someone your own age might not either. It sounds cliché, but follow your heart...just make sure you listen to what your instincts are telling you as well...so make sure your mind follows as well :P.

I followed what I believed was my heart ^^but it was really just following a dream. I have always preferred older men but they seem to think they know better than me. Is that because I am younger? IDK. I am an adult but it seems I have always, always, been the more mature, more loving, selfless individual in the relationship. That works fine for a while but as soon as I claim to have needs, it's like, what??? Can't you do that yourself? Why don't you call a friend to do that? Or take your sister I'm busy! He's got his own agenda and I'm not talking about an important agenda either. As long as I'm there for him (and I always am) everything is fine.

Yes, I noticed that too.

I was always that way. Current BF is ten years older, but he's so much closer to my age than who I used to date that it feels normal. I only think of him being older when we talk about plans for the future. Otherwise, it feels like he is my age.

I look back at my years of dating much older (20+) people and sort of wish I hadn't done that. My 'best' relationships were usually with people 5-10 years older than me.

It does not sound like you actually know any older men but are talking about "public" figures. They are not what we see on TV or read about. My first serious love (in my mid-20s) was a man 20 years older than I was and looking back on it now, it was helpful to my development but not something that would have worked in my life long-term. Teenage boys can mature slower than girls so it might take a few years to find someone interesting closer to one's own age. It is harder with someone much older/younger as background and references are different. My husband is 7 years older than I am and even that has had some disappointments/limits because of age. The stage of life someone older/younger is in is different and can make a difference.

Teenage boys are children. So are teenage girls. That's why they seem childish; they are children. Older men in the public eye, especially those who are trying to appeal to a broad range of ages, will likely appear youthful and fun, but in reality, they are likely as set in their ways, in their personal lives, as men their own age who are not in the public eye.

Handsome isn't necessarily equal to nice or kind. An older man with a thing for teenage girls would worry me far more around my 16 year old daughter than a 16 year old boy.

Grown men have no business dating teenage girls.

There is nothing wrong with fantasies; they are a natural part of growing up. We can "try on" personality characteristics we think are attractive for the time when we become adults and actually do choose a life partner. However, instead of constantly fixating on older men, you might also look to see if you find admirable qualities in boys your own age.

You will likely get many answers about how wide-ranging age differences work for some people. The fact remains that you owe it to yourself to get to know your own peer group because you and your peers are still growing and developing physically, intellectually and emotionally. Your experiences will be concurrent, not separated by a generation or two.

I also encourage you to discuss this with your own parents or trusted school counselor.

I never thought of it that way xD Nice POV! I think that's also the issue for me plus me dreaming of that moment of loving someone.

nearly 13 year age diff btwn me and hub; for us, there are times even years it doesnt matter, while the reverse is true also. ebb and flow, i guess. the best!

My boyfriend is 14 years my senior. We started dating when I was 25. He actually thought I was older and I thought he was younger!

This is how I'd describe it, too. There are definitely things to notice about the age difference; not necessarily that it's bad, but clear differences in experience, potential for children, what it will be like as we age, are serious questions. We love each other though and the good far outweighs the pitfalls, I believe.

But being safe is definitely a priority and I'm glad to hear it stated. If I was 21, even, I don't think it would have been ok to date a man that much older than me. I'm glad I found him when I did, when we both were in a right place for it.

I'm not really terribly surprised that I'd fall for a man in his 60's because of the "daddy issue" thing (not afraid to admit it ). My father was 18 and my mom was 38 when I was born. My sister was 16 and my brother 10. So, I've grown up seeing my father more like an older brother in a lot of ways, except more complicated. He lost his mother when he was a toddler, and always dated women that were decades older than him. His brother did, too. So there definitely is merit to "replacing" a parent in my mind, and it's not just women!

Equating a drive for love with fantasy & attraction to actors/musicians you will never meet is self-destructive. They are not even close to being in the same ballpark. I'd be more concerned with mending that misconception before you worry about finding some older man to whisk you off into fairytale-land.

As for the actual topic? I've always been attracted to older men. Some of these relationships have been incredibly destructive & I know I was being used to fulfill a very common fantasy. Which truthfully never bothered me... I was fulfilling my own! But I think the most important thing is determining why you're in the relationship & whether it is a beneficial or harmful motivation. When I was a young teenager, I think I sought out older men who had themselves [forseeably] "figured out" because that helped balance my hopelessly frantic decision making. That's also why I was sexually submissive. I desired guidance. And it was impossible in an age-group where they were going through the same self-discovery process.

Outside of my experiences? I believe most modern "age limits" are completely arbitrary. Most people do foolish & dangerous things throughout their entire lives, yet it's a punishable offense when they're under 16 or 18? That personally doesn't jive with me & I think it is a double-standard. They claim that consent cannot be made because they do not understand the reality of their decisions... But many older people clearly don't, yet they're not deemed legally incapable of culpability for their actions! It's silly.

All relationships entail a certain level of personal risk; you're putting yourself out there for someone else & expecting the same from them. Expecting trust, respect, & affection & expecting those things to weather through uncertain circumstances. So whether a relationship is "normal" or not? Those still apply. That's more important than whether something is socially acceptable or not.

enjoyed your story and wish you all the best!

Your description seems to be more about the type of person you've been with rather than anything to do with their age though. You can find good men, or bad ones that are insensitive and condescending for any reason at any age. That's all about attitude.

You can assume that but you can't generalize it as if that's the only reason women look for older men. It' really depends on the couple tbh. It doesn't always work but neither is there a guarantee that it will work if you look for someone "your age". I think the important thing is to look fro someone that fits what you will get along with and be happy with. As long as you're both of legal age, it just becomes a number. Everything else is about maturity, interests and attraction.