[IA_2809]

Would you feel comfortable in such a relationship? Have you ever been in such one?

Being honest, I'm 1.95 cm (6''4) and weight around 65-70 kg, in a place where I rarely meet a woman with less than 10 cm or height difference with me. I keep this sensation that many women feel insecure being with me ("I'll look awkward being with such a giant guy"), but I don't have enough proof for accepting this belief. Besides I'm skinny even practicing sports like biking and swimming, and my metabolism doesn't seem like changing at all. I must add I've long, wavy hair and more than once I'm compared to Jesus though I don't wanted it.

Assuming psychological true closeness (I know how unrealistic and hard may be to assume this, but it's for practical reasons) and a height difference, would you try it? Would you actually enjoy/have enjoyed it? Would you feel hopelessly insecure about dating with someone 20-30 cm taller than you?

PD: I'm not looking for this typical answer "some women like it, some don't". Speak for yourself with true honesty, I'm not afraid of reading the truth .

[Angelique67]

I had a boyfriend who was 6'4" and thin. I liked his build a lot (and I loved him). I'm just under 5'4", or was then, for the record).

[Raindropvampire]

I'm 38 and am about 5' 8". I have dated guys as tall as 6' 6" and as short as 5' 4". All have been fairly thin. I care much more about personality than I do anything else. I do think that it sometimes bothers hubby(5' 4") that I'm taller than him but it doesn't matter in the least to me.

My mother who is 5' 10" won't date a guy that is under 6'. I don't know why she just prefers a guy taller than her. I think she's said her optimum height would be between 6' 2" - 6' 4". And I don't think she cares about build but every guy I've seen her with has been very slender.

As long as you aren't resting your chin on my head and teasing me about being short I'm okay with it lol

Having said that it's not my preferred build but if I connect to the person on an emotional level I probably wouldn't care.

[hamster-bamster]

I am surprised by your question. If you were a short man posing a query to the women on the internet asking them for an honest response, it would be one thing, but with your height, to even wonder out loud is a little off, which makes me wonder what is underlying your uncertainty about how women feel being around you. Maybe there is something else that is going on and you are interpreting it as a height thing.

My first H was 189 cm and I am 165 cm. There have been other men, tall and medium height - I honestly do not care. My late mother (173 cm) cared a lot and was upset that she was married to a man her height or even a cm shorter, but that was understandable because in the days of her youth women wore high heels and updos, which made them much taller, and she ended up being taller than my dad and did not like it. Honestly, I have only known women who do not care or women who prefer tall men. This is the first time in my life that I hear of a man your height being unhappy about his height. Since I have lived enough years and am pretty social so I know a lot of people and have heard a lot of opinions, that I find your post so striking ought to tell you at least SOMETHING about the statistical oddity of your question. So I suspect that there is something else at play. What might it be?

Another thing is that if you do not like being compared to Jesus Christ, you can cut your hair short and that would pretty much achieve your goal. Plus, if you consider your height an odd thing, then why are you adding long wavy hair, which is admittedly an odd thing, to the whole package?

You wanted an honest response - here you have it.

[hvert]

I'm 5'1". My boyfriend is a foot taller. He probably weighed around 72k when we met. I think most women are pretty flexible when it comes to having a physical type. Height is generally an advantage.

[gloamingone]

I'm 5'1 and have always preferred tall men. My current boyfriend is 6'2, but I've gone all the way up to 6'7 (and he was very thin).

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[lacerta]

I prefer tall men. My husbands about your height, I love it

[IA_2809]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

This is the first time in my life that I hear of a man your height being unhappy about his height.

I'm not hopelessly unhappy/insecure but more naively wondering. Where I live women are usually about 1.50 - 1.65 [m], men are about 1.70 [m] and I've rarely seen people of my height and lankiness in my area, besides usually hearing comments about tall and skinny guys as "giraffes", though I honestly don't care about this last. I'm really skinny, and I'm usually asked whether I ate lunch everyday or not with some frequency (ofc I do).

About the Jesus thing, I'm for accepting it, slowly. I dislike it basically because I'm apatheist but I guess it's not a big deal. I like my hair so far though I'll cut it after finishing uni, unless something else comes up.

Another points that may show something about the "oddity" of my question: Besides cultural differences between your country and mine, it may also be an effect of my few social interaction these years. I've not had much ones besides the practical everyday ones (my close friendships are just online indeed, so they don't know how am I, and I'm not really close to my close family). This may have a reasonable effect on my self-awareness. I don't have much time for meeting new people when at uni, but I'll manage to do something when on vacations. I must admit I'm unnecessarily cynical sometimes, and it's hard for me to emotionally connect, but I'm optimistic about being enough flexible for changing for the best. I just want to know more for making my potential partner to feel comfortable given the few knowledge and experience I've about spontaneity, more than being afraid of making the ridiculous. I know, overtheorizing something that's actually more about feeling doesn't seem the best idea, but I've my reasons.

Thanks for the honest answers, specially to hamster-bamster, this is the sort of vision I wanted to grasp.

[lizardlady]

My first reaction reading your description of yourself was "This guy's HOT!" Then I saw your reply about being in uni. I'm old enough to be your grandma! I'm feeling kind of like a dirty old lady at this point.

Anyway, you asked for honest answers. I prefer tall thin (skinny) men. I'm also drawn to long hair. My hubby's hair was almost to his waist when we met.

[turquoisesea]

I agree. I actually like tall men. and physically fit is a big turn on (I don't mean ripped muscle but I like the runner look). Actually I like both the buff look and runner look in different ways. but point is from just build and your description I'd say that's a good thing not a bad one?

You could always cut your hair if you are worried about it. Though I tend to like slightly wavy hair in men myself. You'll have ot decide what looks best for you!

[BobbyDavis]

I am not a woman but I just want to say at 6 ft 4 you are far from being a giant and I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I am 6 ft 6 and my height has never been a disadvantage to me when it came to attracting women in between my first girlfriend and my Wife and my biggest disadvantage was always having disabilities.

You need to have more confidence in yourself and stop caring so much what other people think.

[BubonicPlague]

I'd say you're perfect for me!

I have a thing for taller slender guys. I'm 5ft. 10in. and very thin, so I'd want to date someone who's closer to what I am (in a way it makes me feel more comfortable). Toned and very muscular men scare me (no, they really do, they can appear to be intimidating), and I can't imagine being crushed being given a hug. I wouldn't mind dating shorter men, but I like to wear high heels now, and often they don't like that.

[IA_2809]

Originally Posted by BobbyDavis

You need to have more confidence in yourself and stop caring so much what other people think.

Of course being honestly and openly judged is something that happens from time to time in RL. It's not about confidence nor judginess/rejection (I experience rejection from time to time, different causes and context and it's normal, possible to put it on perspective and keep going), it's about getting back my ability to share my feelings and thoughts in an honest, but nice and comprehensive physical way. I want my physical body to help me in communicating such thing as I've a hard time expressing myself and developing my emotional intelligence. Said in other way, I just want to know better what and how I want it relating to physical/sexual issues, and my own body plays a role on it. I know, it may sound simple for many people, but for me it's not. I want to stop acting like a computer and I can imagine a relevant role on this.

edit: I may also add that the time I've kissed/had sex I didn't feel particularly high pleasure from it to the point I questioned myself of being asexual (Nope, I concluded I'm not) There may be other causes besides a lack of self-awareness but I want to give a try on this too.

[macagone210]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

I had a boyfriend who was 6'4" and thin. I liked his build a lot (and I loved him). I'm just under 5'4", or was then, for the record).

is it causing problem for you ?

my boyfriend is 6'5 [& he's skinny] & im only 5'3! but I love it! skinnier men are always better, in my opinion. you'll find the right girl who will make all your thoughts different than what they are now

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by BobbyDavis

I am not a woman but I just want to say at 6 ft 4 you are far from being a giant

BD - you are in Australia, so there are a lot of Caucasian guys around you, and OP mentioned the average heights being on the low side of the range where he lives (East Asia, perhaps), so against the background of 170 cm being the average height for males where he lives, he is - not a giant, but a "standout", if I can put it this way.

[ChipperMonkey]

My guess is that this issue is more about being skinny than being tall, am I right? A lot of women like tall guys. However, I have had more than one guy get offended when I called him "skinny" because apparently that's not necessarily a good thing for a guy?

Personally, I don't like "skinny" guys. I like fit guys who are of normal to slightly above normal weight. But "skinny" guys, no, as it just doesn't feel good to be with them physically.

[IA_2809]

Originally Posted by ChipperMonkey

However, I have had more than one guy get offended when I called him "skinny" because apparently that's not necessarily a good thing for a guy?

There are some concerns for some males about it, for me I don't care being skinny itself nor I see it as a good or bad thing. but it annoys me when someone commits this usual fallacy believing all humans are the same, and tries to make it looking like it's a decision. "You decided to be skinny; if you want, you're able to get some weight just like anyone. Show some will". It's sort of the same reasoning used against depressive people "Happiness is a choice; stop crying and smile, if I'm human and I can do it, you too". This may be fairly valid and easy for some people, but for others with some metabolic issues, diabetes, or another illness it's not that simple.

[ombrétwilight]

The guy I've liked for the past 2 years is only 5'3" or so, which is short even by Asian standards. My ex is from Texas and approx. 6'2". He's also a lot buffer than my current beau, but ultimately, it was really the personality that mattered. I just clicked with this guy and not so much with my ex.

Personally, I find height very arbitrary. While I would not date anyone shorter than me (it's hardly difficult) and prefer a taller man, looks and character are equally important. So I guess what I mean is, I evaluate the entire package! You sound like a cool dude and like hamster said, I haven't heard a guy your height complain yet!

I'm 5'1"... or 2" on good days.

[lizardlady]

"You decided to be skinny; if you want, you're able to get some weight just like anyone. Show some will".

I was underweight most of my life. As much as the media pushes females to be thin, people will make snarky comments about my weight. Can't tell you the number of times I was accused of being anorexic. People felt they had a right to tell me to "put some meat on your bones." The reality was that I ate anything that held still longer enough for me to shove it down my throat. I ate more that most teen aged boys. I had an active lifestyle and a killer metabolism. I got realy tired of the comments. Also got tired of overweight folks telling me they wished they had my "problem."

[BobbyDavis]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

BD - you are in Australia, so there are a lot of Caucasian guys around you, and OP mentioned the average heights being on the low side of the range where he lives (East Asia, perhaps), so against the background of 170 cm being the average height for males where he lives, he is - not a giant, but a "standout", if I can put it this way.

Thanks for pointing that out for me. I get what you mean and I have a friend who is 7 foot 3 and he is technically a real giant and has trouble dating because people are intimidated by his size. I must have overlooked the part where he said he was living in Asia but this member is having similar problems to that I can understand.

[IA_2809]

I said my country's avg height was lower than mine without specifying region. Though I don't live in Asia (I'm from Latin America), I've reviewed worldwide stats about avg height and it seems like I'd be less fit there, though. When I was a more inmature teenager I daydreamed living in some European country with the hope I'd fit more though I stopped caring when I realized that won't be the main factor for helping me get a better job, success chances for dating, treated less differently, etc. Since then I'm in this sort of "just accept you're different, at least it's not a disability and it has its non-social advantages" and I expect to find a better stance in my future about it. I usually react with external indifference any time I'm remarked for it (as a mechanism of defense) to the point people get angry sometimes, though internally I consider it as a descriptive factor for understanding which kind of person I'm seeing. I must admit I'm not the most sympathetic guy (I lost practice and this site seems a nice place for reminding me how to improve on this) and this has a bigger effect on connecting, likely to be a more real issue for relationships. I had this on mind but I wanted to make this thread based mainly on the height issue.