[justaguy]

my girl friend had/is an affair at her job place, not with a co-worker but someone who would go there and meet (sorry no details, its digusting) my problem is with all the freedom of this part-time job i as you have read i dont trust her. am i right to insist that she quit her job. there is no issue of money. i feel that if she wants to regain my trust its my way or the highway.the other guy dosent really her.besides he cant manage to keep himself out of jail/prison, pay his own bills or off hard drugs.hell after reading what i just wrote, why am i even considering any of this in the first place.yep its mess .maybe i should just be my mean self call the cops on him call her boss destroy lives and move on (i do so like the taste of revenge).

[Raynaadi]

I think if it was me, I'd have to leave the relationship.

[Soidhonia]

Hello Just a guy.
I sincerely feel that you need to EVALUATE the situation and see for youself what you need to do to be safe and secure. It seems like you need to control the situation by helping her to do the right thing, and if she wanted to do the right thing she would not need you giving the ultimatums in order to be in a stable relationship. If you have a therapist I would highly suggest that you get the help you need in order to see things as they truly are at this time, instead of having someone else DESTROY your life and FUTURE,. REVENGE can destroy you as well, PLEASE do not go there you may find yourself regretting the decision later than sooner..I hope the best for you and I hope you get the help you need at this time to help you gain control for your future to be something youcan be happy and content with at this time. Take care and good day. Soidhonia

[GYPSYEYES]

hello Doug my heart goes out to ya buddy . IMO let her go shes isn't thinking of your feelings in all of this and if it didn't occur to her to quit her job (you stated its not a money issue) and try to salvage the relationship then---- off with her head. lol justjoking. You have to do what you feel is best for you. If shes not thinking of you now she never will it will always be about HER. goodluck my friend and please remember
HAPPINESS is the BEST REVENGE!!

DOUG

[Perna]

I don't think you can ask another to change their life (I guess you can ask but can't "demand") in that way, especially if it's about a problem in the past. If your girlfriend is having an affair now, it doesn't sound like she wants to be in a relationship with you (or actually, it sounds like you shouldn't be in one with her). Everyone has to stand on their own two feet and make their own decisions/mistakes about themselves and just limiting another as with having your girlfriend quit her job won't "protect" either of you from such situations.

[justaguy]

im responding to everybody one revenge is simply not telling lies. or putting a dope fiend behind bars something that i gladly pay taxes for, anyway this would be a personal touch. i also feel i can demand im not begging for anything there is no please stay with me going on here. and as the same as changing the oil every 6000 miles i consider it preventive maintaince. true she dose not have to respond then she can leave. ya see i dont have to prove she is still seeing him, she has to prove shes not . i already discovered the former true it did break my heart but now ( not feeling such the lose) why should i even feel that i should compromise anything, hence the demand. and yes youll like this quote( my dad says my sister is a ***** and she cant come back here no more, he means it.) david alan coe
anyway i do enjoy all your insites they do widen my insites, and hope for more i thought i should clearify some things