What is his problem?

I have been married to this man many years,he comes from a family of constant talkers.They never stop talking,one always has to talk louder than the others.He has a problem with anger & has no reason to be angry.Days pass & he is fine then out of nowhere hes cussing & fuming about past jobs ,people he has known,the news.We never know what to expect & I have lived on edge for years.When our kids were small he would throw things & become angry for no reason.To this day the now grown up kids do not like to be near him.We love him dearly but he has pushed us away because we never know what to expect from him & it hurts.I am sure he loves us to.He would never see a doctor for this,& I dont even know what his disorder would be called.He smokes 2 packs a day, drinks coffee constantly,over eats when he does eat.sleeps all day & makes it impossible for people at home to sleep at night.He fusses at the pets,plays the radio or on the computer at night.There is no subject under the sun we can talk to him about because he goes off the deep end & talks for hours on just about anything we say.I just want to crawl under a rock & stay there.If I did sit him down & have a talk about how he makes us cringe he would be so mad & I just cant deal with his anger.we have never had a decent conversation that I remember.I have spent a lifetime trying to stay one jump ahead to keep order & make things go smoothly.I am getting old & tired.

I just looked back over my post last year & had to laugh.It was the same thing I just posted today.So nothing has changed & if there are no replies its ok.Just forgive me for repeating myself,its becoming a habit !

(((loulou2014))).....Your husband sounds like my dad. We have had suspicions that he may be narcissistic. Sorry you have had such a hard time. It hasn't been easy for my family either. I feel for you. This is not to say your husband is narcissistic but here's a link you may want to check out, and then perhaps let hubby read it:
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Symptoms | Psych Central
Best wishes!!!

Yeah, I would have suggested NPD also. Not that your husband is, but perhaps some of the coping strategies people use with NPD loved ones would help in your situation. Living with an unpredictably angry person is really, really hard.

I think you summed it up perfectly and succinctly. If you can't imagine sitting down and talking this out with him then print this and hand it to him. Again, you wrote it out perfectly. Walk away and let him read it. If he rants about it, walk away again until he calms down. At this point, what do you have to lose? Your at your wits end and I think you'll feel better letting him know what it's been like living with him. He's a bully. If you feel threatened, tell him so and that you won't hesitate to call 911. He won't like it, but he'll know it's true. We all know when we're misbehaving and REALLY don't like it when we're called out on it after getting away with it for so long.