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#1
Jul 04, 2007, 11:14 AM
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My husband and I have been married for 7 years we have 2 children, 5 and 3. Lately he's telling me I am not in to him and he feels unwanted. I fall asleep on him while we are in the middle of foreplay. He told me he is over it and doesn't care about sex anymore. I love him and am turned on by him, but the minute I lay down I fall a sleep on him. I want to save the sexual aspect of my marriage
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#2
Jul 04, 2007, 11:18 AM
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does he need to help you do more chores, so that you aren't exhausted at bedtime??????? a little mental foreplay before bed?????? and you, a little excitement in lingerie, candles, etc.? a shower together?
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#3
Jul 04, 2007, 11:29 AM
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He is a great husband and father, we both work and share the chore load. I tell him I will work on the problem, but he says I hear it all the time forget it, he says my words do not mean anything to him.
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#4
Jul 04, 2007, 11:51 AM
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how is your sleep? what time are you falling asleep?
__________________
He who angers you controls you! |
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#5
Jul 04, 2007, 12:24 PM
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if its lately, why is he so ready to give up on your marriage so easily?, he's being selfish, maybe there is something medically wrong that makes you even more tired then usual,hell, maybe he needs to tune-up his foreplay skills, geez.. im sorry, just he hasnt even considered that its not all about him and there could be something else going on with your body. goodluck
take care of U |
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#6
Jul 04, 2007, 12:35 PM
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 ((((((((((((((((((((((((((dudley)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))First of all, Welcome to PC! We're glad you are here. I hope you will find the support you need here. My first thought about your problem is that if you both share in the household responsibilities and you are still having issues with sleep, then maybe a trip to your doc is in order. There may be a physical illness or reason why you are having this difficulty. Maybe you are suffering from sleep apnea, maybe you are suffering from having too much mundane routine in your life. It's hard to say. But having a physical and speaking with your doc may open doors to what your problem may be and solutions to rectify them. I wish you and your husband well and hope you can find some relief to your problem. Take good care of YOU! Hugssss J |
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#7
Jul 04, 2007, 12:40 PM
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I get up around 5:30 and we usually go to bed about 10:00. No matter what time it is as soon as I sit down or lay down Iam out.
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#8
Jul 04, 2007, 12:42 PM
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He said I have been ignoring his flirting and advances for sometime now. He is a touchy feely person and I love that but i have a crappy way of showing it I guess.
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#9
Jul 04, 2007, 12:48 PM
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{{{{{duds}}}}}
get yourself a physical, any chance your preggers, tiredness and moodiness can happen even in first trimester. sleep apnea is also another thing. go to doc.see whats going on with your body, show him your going and trying to find out whats wrong , if anything. hopefully he will be supportive wish you luck Vanessa |
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#10
Jul 04, 2007, 01:39 PM
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i remember being tired out when my children were that age. it's the hardest job in the world looking after littlies. take time out for yourself in the evening, go to the docs, you may be anaemic too. iron tablets may be the answer or like some of the others have said, maybe your husband should look at himself too before just blaming you. also get a blood test for you thyroid, that too was one of my problems - underactive. good luck.
look after yourself, love jinnyann xoxoxoxo |
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#11
Jul 04, 2007, 01:45 PM
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yes definitely go to the doctors and b12 is a great energy booster for some people
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#12
Jul 04, 2007, 03:39 PM
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another thing...maybe try having sex in different places.....maybe the bed is way to comfortable for you .....perhaps having sex on the floor....on a table....hey ...ill tell you what...ive had to do it in the bathroom with my bf...because we never have privacy anymore...gaurntee you wont fall asleep there...lol
i would also agree with going to see a doctor.... but i did listen to a sleep specialist on tv....and he said why most people cant sleep when they go to bed is because they do other activities in bed...like sex....and tv....and reading....he said to make sure you are able to go to sleep in bed right away....is do things elsewhere...if you have done this...not had activties in bed...your body is soley used to the fact that you go in bed to sleep...not have sex or read or even watch tv....you probably have one of the best sleep scheduales a sleep specialist could see....if you dont apply to this than yea...go see a doctor...well even if you dont apply to this go see a doctor ...good luck
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#13
Jul 04, 2007, 04:14 PM
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Hi there, Dudley, and welcome to PC. I agree with the others -- a trip to a physician is in order -- and hubby needs as attitude adjustment. Perhaps a trip to a relationship counselor, alone or with him f he will go.
__________________
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#14
Jul 05, 2007, 06:55 PM
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By the 8th year of marriage and the birth of our child my wife and I found ourselves so exhausted all the time that sex just was a memory. We were in grad school, working two jobs, raising a child, and keeping up a house and all that entails. Now after retiring I have no idea how I did all that but I do know I would have discussed with her back then some way we could find time for intimacy.
Our stress led to our demise and we divorced within the next six years after spending a whole two years in separate bed rooms and no sex. I highly recommend marriage counseling if you are to get some solid recommendations of what to do about your problem. We tried counseling but it didn't work for us because we went way too late. jb |
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