Dominating and Argumentative

We own a studio and we hire our studio space out to people who want to shoot videos. Our green screen is pre-lit with high end lights that are positioned perfectly. No one needs to move the lights, they are perfect where they are. We like getting new clients, as we want to build our client base.

A new potential client had a tour of the studio. In his twenty minute tour he told us we had to locate the lights closer to the screen, we had to remove a decorative backdrop and replace it with a black backdrop (in case he wants to shoot on black). He told us he expected a deep, deep discount, as he was going to give us his database of fellow advertising people (his competition). He didn't offer it to us, he told us he would be expecting a really big discount in exchange for his contact list.

He criticised how the floor extenders were not perfectly aligned with the main stage. At the door, before he left I told him he needed production insurance (insurance to cover the days of his production in the studio). He immediately said "that's a deal breaker." He said this bluntly. I thanked him for his time and walked away from the door. He said something, I forget what he said. I said "we can insure you, but it's an extra cost." He repeated "that's a deal breaker." I again thanked him for his time and walked away. He mumbled something, then left slamming the door.

A half hour later he called me and said he had comprehensive insurance coverage, but wasn't willing to buy production insurance. I told him everyone has comprehensive insurance coverage and we always accept that. You would think this would resolve this wouldn't you? Not by a long shot. He took issue with me calling it production insurance. So we proceeded to have a long conversation about insurance terminology. Finally I said "do we really have to have an argument about insurance terminology?"

So, we moved on to talking about the willingness to use the insurance policy in the event of damage to the studio and a willingness to cover the insurance deductible in the event we need to make a claim. This led to a third argument, where he claimed we needed to write up a formal contract now. All of our clients provide an insurance policy for their shoot. They also all agree to use the insurance in the event they cause damage to the studio or equipment. They all agree to pay the deductible. And this is all agreed to by way of a simple email. So, I brush it aside with a comment like "ok, we'll write up a contract."

I then informed him we don't give deep discounts to anyone. I told him we're happy to give discounts to people we've worked with for awhile, but we have to get to know a client first and see that we will get repeat business from them. He began shouting about how important he was in his industry and that he wouldn't share his contact list with me without the discount. I told him he needed to actually help us first before he got the discount. He got loud.

He took issue with providing insurance, he took issue with the terminology I used about the insurance, he took issue with having to agree to use the insurance in the event of damage to the studio or equipment. And he wanted a deep discount. So we had four arguments in less than one hour.

We've had forty clients through our studio over the past 2 years and have never had to argue with any of them. This man argued over petty things four times in less than an hour. He wanted to rent the studio for ten hours, how many arguments would have ensued over 10 hours? I truly believe there are some people in life that just want to argue. Period. They want to argue. They love to argue. And they will argue with you about everything.

This is not the kind of client we are looking for. Have you ever met someone you could just not reason with? Someone who's only reality is their own? Sometimes all you can do is walk away. Which I did...again.

I believe this with all my heart and mind. You just can't get along with some people. Encounters with some people just can't end in a good way, no matter what. They are walking/talking conflicts, just waiting for some unsuspecting person to come along whom they can argue with. I feel sorry for him. But I still can't be around him.

The problem with giving someone a discount prior to them fulfilling a task to earn the discount is, they may never deliver anything. This has already happened to us before. Promises are made, but not kept. This is the first time I've encountered someone who wanted to do nothing but argue...about everything.

I'm not asking for advice, I really just need to vent. Although if you want to put forward advice, I will read it.

I just wanted to say I agree with you wholeheartedly. Not only have I met a few but I'm related to about 10 people like that. I you say nice day they want to argue about how there's no such thing. Just petty people trying to make themselves feel better. I'm glad you decided not to work with him.

Thanks for the support. I don't like turning down business, but I also don't like putting up with unreasonable, domineering and argumentative people.

I'd really like to know why some people turn out this way.

From what I've seen in my family some seem born that way(I remember years ago telling a cousin, who was only 5 at the time, the sky was pretty. She popped back with not really I prefer it a lighter blue ) and some it's years of abuse that turns them that way.

But all in all I really think you dodged a bullet. Let's say he did give you his contacts..what if they deal with him because they are like him?? So even if he'd kept his word he could have been giving you even more of a pain.

Yeah . . . I have a relative like that. He constantly scans the conversation for something he can dispute. A person like that is truly not worth being around. Underneath the arrogance, he's pathetic . . . and lonely. Never did know how to assert himself appropriately, so does this to compensate. He's sad.

You were right to walk away. Thus guy's business would not have been worth what you'ld go through for it.

He sounded like he was up to no good. That's one reason why people act that way. Another is because they fear lack of control, which is their insecurity showing.

You really don't need that type of business. Then it makes it hard to go to work.
Remember you have something he wants. You have the upper hand & run your business the way you see fit!

Thanks everyone for your kind comments. Ironically, today we received two phone calls from brand new clients who are both very kind and respectful. Those clients are out there and they will find us. There's no reason to cater to the arguers.

Some people just argue about everything . Bet you this guy argues with everyone he knows. Not just you. He also believes it's never his fault and everyone is out to get him. Also sense of grandiose, bet you he us g as successful as he thinks he is. Stir away from people like this

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It won't let me to edit, autocorrect misspellings. Meant he isn't as successful as he thinks

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I'd even inquire about other people he'd worked with. What was he like??? Hmmm

Patagonia - thanks for that insight. It seems to me he didn't save his subpar behaviour just for me. He treats everyone like this. And most likely many people bow down to his expectations. Which means he views me as profoundly flawed. I don't allow myself to be defined by others, so whatever he sees in me exists inside of him only. I know who I am and I know I don't want to work with disrespectful people.

Oh well done ClaireRobin!

Aren't people like this the most bloody exhausting folk on the earth?!

IDK if it's about power, control, or some hidden pathology I cannot figure out -- but people who behave in this way come under exactly one of my personal headings:

Not. Worth. It !

Impressive that you walked away and let him keep his unreasonableness for himself.

Xo,
Chyia, nodding head vigourously

As a service based business we are sometimes viewed as "their" personal employees because they are paying for a service. When someone did this to me, I fired them as clients even before they become clients. As in, "before we go any further with this, you will need to find someone who can help you with what you want and who is willing to do business your way. I am not that person". I have never worried about their friends being told how awful I was, because their friends are probably like them :-) And, I have also learned that these people suck energy because other people have let them. When they can't get their energy from their current situation, they move on looking for another source of energy. Totally worth letting this guy go, you were right to send this guy away.

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Well said, thanks.