I don't enjoy my life

I'm starting to realize that I am just existing.

I don't hate my life, but there is nothing I enjoy, either. Sure, there are plenty of things I do which are enjoyable. When I do go out with friends, I have some fun. But nothing in my life is fulfilling. I don't have anyone in my life who, I feel, gets me.

I know that the comments which follow are likely going to say take up a hobby--I have them. Or meet new friends--I could try, but a) it's difficult when you're single in your late 30's and b) I'm not terribly interested in the Meetup activities in my area in the first place. The friends I have either don't want to do the stuff I want to do or can't afford to, so I do it on my own, which gets terribly boring after a while. And they don't really invite me to do anything with them, but I feel like I probably wouldn't be fully present anyway. Family friends took me out to lunch at a great place today, and I was super detached, just listening to them talk the whole time. I have nothing to say. I don't feel like engaging. And they could tell--I'm usually fairly animated and talkative.

I'd love to go on vacation soon (I'll probably have 5 days off in August with no plans) but I don't want to hang out alone.

I'm just tired of the status quo.

Before I graduated, getting my degree and nursing license was my focus. Now I have that and yeah, I have to earn my BSN but that's a formality. I have a few vague life goals, but nothing achievable in the next few years.

I'm bored. I'm lonely. I'm restless, and I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin.

I've felt that way and then I get a second wind and feel better. I hope this down feeling passes for you soon. You did just come off a break up.

I really didn't, though. We weren't dating. Barely knew each other. Never met.

Still, it was enough to bring you down.

There are actually other stressors going on in my life.

I think I get some of this. Only, I DO have a fulfilling relationship. Still, I am aware there should be more to my life than that and I yearn for it. My relationship isn't - and shouldn't - be the be all to end all. I want more. I am bored. I am restless. There was a time I led a thriving, eventful, and satsfying life. I wish I could have the means (finances are the biggest restriction) to regain and live some of that way. I feel that I am so often putting on a facade of pretending to be completely happy.

Take this, for example: I just want to go to the beach today or tomorrow. I've texted several people. No one can/wants to go. I could put a general "Who wants to go?" on FB, wouldn't get a reply. My T said today to find a way to get out of my apartment. Okay well, easier said than done. I'm SICK of doing shyt alone. Going to the beach alone is boring after a while. Going on road trips is as well. I do things alone all the time; sometimes I want to do things with people, besides go for a quick drink and appetizer, and not have to plan it weeks in advance.

This is just one of the reasons, albeit a silly one, why I am bored and unfulfilled.

I know it can be hard. Maybe you should try to be more inner directed and do as long as it doesn't harm anyone , including you. How do you feel calling your friends? Are there other ways to find new friends besides Meetups where you live? I hope so.

Perhaps volunteering or involvement in politics or other community activities that matter to you might be ways to meet new people.

Been there, done it.

I have no interest.

Also, I don't really meet people the traditional ways. Never have. People don't really warm up to me, and vice versa. Can't really change my core make-up; I'm not an overly warm person. I don't really know what to say, and so when I meet new people, I don't really talk to them. I've worked in my ER for three years and am just now starting to get to know people on a deeper level, and am starting to maybe call a couple of coworkers friends.

Lack of interest is often a symptom of depression. Difficult as it definitely is, one option is to push ahead anyway, despite current felt lack of interest. This is sometimes called "acting opposite to current emotion".

Your progress in the ER is a good sign. How did you make that progress? Perhaps there are opportunities to further build the friendships and professional relationships there. Perhaps something, or something more, outside of work could be done with a colleague or colleagues.

I'm right there with you. So sorry you're experiencing this as well.

I feel the same way. So, I feel with you. I wish I had a suggestion for you, or if I could help in any way

I've pushed a lot of 'friends' I had in the past when I was depressed.

Didn't want to see anyone, do anything. They've long since moved on and I don't have contact with them.

There are times when I wish I hadn't lost that so called friendship but I did.

It's only now that I've been with my bf that I'm starting to get out more, but it's with him and I have yet to meet any of his friends but it's early days still.

I think what I'm saying is I get it when you say you don't have people to go out with ... I didn't either for 2 years and it sucked.

I'm pretty much low key at work - I haven't formed what I would consider so called friends just yet and I've been there for 5 months. I tend to shy away from the staff room.

I don't have a solution to this.