[Sadley]

Why are there no women in existence that simply do not want kids?? Kids aren't that great. I can list MANY reasons to not have kids.

1. Having kids is like starting over. I don't want to have to start over, teaching someone everything from scratch, when I've come this far.

2. I don't want to be responsible for another life.

3. I don't think the world is a good place to live

4. I don't want to FORCE someone, WITHOUT their consent, into being for my pleasure (in theory, except it wouldn't be my pleasure since I don't want to have kids).

5. I don't want to make anyone else suffer.

6. I have many diseases and illnesses that run through my family (heart disease, diabetes, life-threatening allergies, depression, anxiety, ocd, poor eyesight, I'm sure there's more)

7. I can't afford a child monetarily and I would want to give the child the best shot at life I could.

8. I don't think I would make a good parent

9. I simply do not want to sacrifice all of my time for children

10. I want to simply enjoy my adult life with a girl and have great sex uninterrupted (someone tell me what is wrong with that???)

11. I don't want a child to have to worry about dying or the afterlife (something I struggled with in my life)

I could go on people!!

[gayleggg]

My daughter and son-in-law have decided to not have children, so there is hope of you finding a women that doesn't want children. Good luck in your search.

You make some valid arguments.

[Bill3]

What have you been doing to try to find women who do not want kids?

[Sadley]

I have been on match.com since about the beginning of the year, and I have gotten a grand total of 0 responses from anyone. I have sent approximately 60 emails. I know that that is not a lot of messages, especially since it takes 100's to actually get a response as a guy, however, whenever I refine my search to actually find someone that I would be interested in, there are about 12 people that come up.

Some people might say, "oh well you just need to be more open" and that I am narrowing my search too much. But I disagree, I would say I am being quite generous in what I'm allowing there to be in my searches. I only narrowed it by: The person has to be white, mexican/latino or black, in the range of age 23-30, non-smoker, and for "Wants kids" I put a check next to Not sure, Probably not, or No. So by checking "Not sure" there is even still the possibility that they could want kids, yet I am still returning about 12 results. That's 12 results out of all of the women on match.com within a 30 mile radius of my area! And I live in a HEAVILY populated area, the capital of Arizona.

I have gone to meetup.com groups for singles, nerd/geek types (because, well, I am one) and no success there. I have tried other dating sites, most everything is a scam that asks you for your credit card #. I'm 26 years old and running out of time here. I'm just wondering if I should end my life now rather than wait and find out I'll have to later anyways.

Running out of time at only 26? That's still quite young.

[Sadley]

Yes, running out of time @ 26 indeed. I am getting to the age where most girls have already had kids and are single moms (because face it, no one stays together anymore) and that is another dealbreaker for me (someone that has kids already). You know what would've been nice would be to find a virgin girl, but that can't happen anymore. Instead, my first girlfriend who had countless partners before me had me (as a virgin guy). That alone gives me reason to be quite depressed. I've already missed out on most of the fun of being a youth, all I'm hoping for is to find someone who is at least somewhat attractive that I can love and be loved back. But without that, I'm hopeless, because that's all I care about, so I might as well not be alive.

[divine1966]

There are plenty of people who don't want kids. My coworker and his wife have no interest in having kids et. My daughter says plenty of her friends don't want kids. That's not that unusual

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[Sadley]

One would think that, but I'm pretty sure (99.9%) that of the women who say they don't want kids, 100% of them will change their mind eventually. That's what happened to me with my 1st girlfriend. She supported me getting my vasectomy one day, and then the next she decides she does want kids after all (even though unfortunately for her she has an extremely low likelihood of being able to have kids due to her PCOS).

[Crazy Hitch]

I'll admit it's not that common for a female to never want kids. Most women I know do / did. Having said that there are very rare few women who wouldn't - but it does narrow down your options considerably. Sorry but I don't want to paint an unrealistic picture. But in having said that I guess you would have known this prior to having your vasectomy.

[LadyShadow]

I am a woman and I don't want kids. Its also hard to find a person without kids too.

I understand your pain.

But @ 26 you still have plenty of time. I am 35 and still have no one and I am not trying to kill myself because of it.

[JJORANGE]

I'm 23 and I know I don't want kids. I was a nanny for many years and I love kids, but I dont want my own. I want to be able to go home at the end of the day to a clean house, spend my own money, not have to worry about buying diapers, saving for college, finding daycare etc etc.

Personally, just reading your posts, I wouldnt be interested just because you sound very aggressive when it comes to this topic. Saying you're thinking of killing yourself because at 26 you cant find someone who also doesn't want kids is a bit extreme. If I read that somewhere else let me tell you... I'd run. I'm not saying that to be mean or anything so please don't take offense as I'm positive you have a lot to offer someone and you're an amazing guy. But come on.. it sounds like by saying that you are trying to guilt trip someone into being with you

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Sadley

Why are there no women in existence that simply do not want kids?? Kids aren't that great. I can list MANY reasons to not have kids.

1. Having kids is like starting over. I don't want to have to start over, teaching someone everything from scratch, when I've come this far.

2. I don't want to be responsible for another life.

3. I don't think the world is a good place to live

4. I don't want to FORCE someone, WITHOUT their consent, into being for my pleasure (in theory, except it wouldn't be my pleasure since I don't want to have kids).

5. I don't want to make anyone else suffer.

6. I have many diseases and illnesses that run through my family (heart disease, diabetes, life-threatening allergies, depression, anxiety, ocd, poor eyesight, I'm sure there's more)

7. I can't afford a child monetarily and I would want to give the child the best shot at life I could.

8. I don't think I would make a good parent

9. I simply do not want to sacrifice all of my time for children

10. I want to simply enjoy my adult life with a girl and have great sex uninterrupted (someone tell me what is wrong with that???)

11. I don't want a child to have to worry about dying or the afterlife (something I struggled with in my life)

I could go on people!!

There are plenty of women that don't want children first of all. I know a few myself. It's not just men that have this type of feeling toward having kids just gotta look around more.

"I don't want children" - should be sufficient here. Your reasons, your explanations and all of those that you listed are irrelevant if you're looking for a mate that wants to be with you and find out if you're right for each other. If you find yourself needing to explain the list to her, then move on, she's not the one. Because the one that's right will go "yeah I get it, neither do I" no reasons needed.

[Sadley]

Yeah, sounds like I'm ****ed.

Which do you think would be better, jumping off of a building or a gun?

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Sadley

Yeah, sounds like I'm ****ed.

Which do you think would be better, jumping off of a building or a gun?

So what in any of the replies has caused you to jump to the conclusion that you're ____ed?

To assume that there is not a single woman out there that would go for a guy that wants no children is quite honestly, simplistic and generalistic at best. Realistic outlook would accept the fact that yes, there may be fewer women looking for relationships without children in the future but it's not impossible ot find women like that

You can continue to think with defeatism in your mind but I encourage you to ponder this more.

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Sadley

I'm 26 years old and running out of time here.

Seriously? At 26, I was barely getting started. I'm 48 now and I sure as heck don't feel I'm out of time with regards to life or even dating if I choose to do so.

[~Christina]

I know many people that choose not to have children. Sure it might take a bit more dating to find someone who does not want to have kids also.

But ...... Really ? your 26 and think that suicide is the best option for you ?

I think you need to seek immediate help so you can see that your thought process is way way way out in left field.

[divine1966]

I am concerned about suicidal thoughts you have. Please seek help ASAP.

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[ComfortablyNumb5]

Originally Posted by Sadley

Why are there no women in existence that simply do not want kids?? Kids aren't that great. I can list MANY reasons to not have kids.

1. Having kids is like starting over. I don't want to have to start over, teaching someone everything from scratch, when I've come this far.

2. I don't want to be responsible for another life.

3. I don't think the world is a good place to live

4. I don't want to FORCE someone, WITHOUT their consent, into being for my pleasure (in theory, except it wouldn't be my pleasure since I don't want to have kids).

5. I don't want to make anyone else suffer.

6. I have many diseases and illnesses that run through my family (heart disease, diabetes, life-threatening allergies, depression, anxiety, ocd, poor eyesight, I'm sure there's more)

7. I can't afford a child monetarily and I would want to give the child the best shot at life I could.

8. I don't think I would make a good parent

9. I simply do not want to sacrifice all of my time for children

10. I want to simply enjoy my adult life with a girl and have great sex uninterrupted (someone tell me what is wrong with that???)

11. I don't want a child to have to worry about dying or the afterlife (something I struggled with in my life)

I could go on people!!

AMEN!!! I'm a 29 year old female that doesn't want kids! I wanted one sooo badly when I was about 24 and ended up with a miscarriage. Now that I see how my life is still going, I think it was for the best. Now if I did get pregnant with my current bf then we probably would have it. In a way I feel like time is running out on me. But I have plenty of friends my age that don't have kids yet! Studies show that our generation is doing things later in life and I'm fine with that! Actually I know I can't get pregnant right now because if my psych meds took away my cycle and that does worry me.

Now finding a SO with out kids is tough. My bf has two boys and they drive me up a wall lol. I'm getting my own taste of motherhood now and it's not easy! Ideally I wish I would of found someone with no kids but I wouldn't change a thing now.


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[A Red Panda]

1. Plenty of women do not want children. But it is less socially acceptable for us to say so.

2. At age 26, there are lots of people who are just graduating from universities or are very early in their careers. Life is far from over.

3. This is a mental health forum. If you are sincerely considering suicide then you need to speak with a professional. If you aren't seriously considering it then you should be more sensitive to the fact that there are people here who have suicidal ideations.

4. You cannot say such a blatant lie as saying that 100% of women who say they don't want kids will change their mind. That's a seriously sexist mindset and will not help you build any relationship with any woman.

[cheshiregrins]

I don't want kids.

[ScientiaOmnisEst]

I'll be 22 next week and I have no interest in having kids. I'm too selfish, frankly, I don't want that kind of responsibility or commitment, plus I just don't think I'd be a good parent.

So there are definitely some of us out there.

Originally Posted by lolagrace

Running out of time at only 26? That's still quite young.

Right? I mean, I guess at 38 y/o, single and childless, I should have just rolled off the planet by now.

[Sadley]

Ok, yes, you're all right, and I'm sorry. I am highly irrational right now, I can't help it. I'm not going to kill myself, I don't have what it takes. I do still feel hopeless though. I do need serious help but I'm afraid there isn't any help to be had. I've already been hospitalized, and I do not want to do that again. Everyone in there was just a bunch of drug addicts. There was no one like me in there. A riot broke out because they weren't given enough smoke breaks. I don't smoke, I never will. I do still think that I'm out of time though. I just feel like I've already missed out on a lot of fun in my younger years. I remember being asked to go to all the parties and stuff and I just said no. I hate myself and who I am. I wish I was never born. I don't think I will ever find anyone again...with this mindset, you're right. I don't know how to change.

[TishaBuv]

My cousin had her first baby at 42 and 2nd at 44, both healthy and beautiful!

My best friend growing up always said she never wanted to have kids, and she never did. She is very happy, married, and fulfilled. She calls her pets her kids.

Don't be so hard on yourselves.

[A Red Panda]

I had a pretty good time in university. I attended uni from age 20-25.

But my favourite years? 25 and up so far. Why? Because I'm working and can afford to do the things I want to do!