One Complaint

I was always very thin up until about 3-4 years ago. I gained a ton of weight- maybe 70lbs over the past 3-4 years. My husband never commented when I was thin nor does he comment now that I am very over weight. We have been together for almost 20 years. He’s not really heavy but he loves food. I know the source of my weight gain is part age, part hormone issues and constant eating out or ordering in. I have not read all the comments but maybe your fiancé just likes you with a little more meat? Or maybe he just doesn’t notice one way or the other if you’ve gained or not. I would just highly stress to him that you still want to eat with him, but something different from what he’s having. If junk food is becoming an issue, weather it be candy, cake, potato chips, soda or whatever..just try swapping out with small changes. If you want to snack with him-then buy pop chips (they come in several flavors) or make pop corn-without butter. If he’s having..I don’t know...a cheesesteak or pizza for dinner...then get yourself a panini or a healthy version of pizza(gluten free, vegan, or a newer thing is cauliflower crust pizza). If he orders fried chicken, order yours baked. It’s okay if you want to watch your weight and he doesn’t want to watch his. Just tell him bluntly. “I love you, but I’m watching my waistline. So eat what you want and I’ll eat what I want and we can still enjoy our meals together”

I also wanted to add that if you don’t like to exercise then a walk will go a long way to burning a few calories. When it comes to walking for me-I always say anyone can do anything for 10 minutes. So if I don’t feel motivated to power walk-I go for a leasure walk and usually end up walking a good bit and building speed once I’m out there.

Thats difficult but I try to educate men about how bad that stuff is and also how much cheaper it is for you to shop and cook and how much fun it can be. Maybe watch top chef and have a friend come and cook with you. At first maybe make desserts and transition to healthier foods. Kind of like saying if you want your sweets you have to eat the healthy stuff. Maybe he doesnt like your cooking? I like stuff like stirfry my bf doesnt care for it. Every now and then i make it for myself. Also soup. Let him have his fast food on those nights. But make things he really likes to start following a recipe and he'll get used to it. Its like starting a dog on new dogfood lol. We crave what we eat all the time. He can crave carrots as much as burgers.

I dated endocrinologist once and I remember he told me that trick is that what goes in has to be less what comes out otherwise people gain weight. If one burns 2000 calories a day one either has to consistently eat less than 2k or exercise to burn more. Otherwise there is no way to lose or maintain weight

I do have to take responsibility here since I feel like I am blaming him, when I can control what I eat. You make a good point here, Divine......

For me, the problem is I DO love all the food he eats, so when it's around and he encourages me, I do partake sometimes...... I have to learn how to control myself better around all the junkfood.... I do try to choose healthier options when they're available and when we eat out, so there is that...

Trust me if I could, I’d eat junk 24/7. Lol it’s addictive. Right now I want fries.

My daughter says if she could, she’d have a bucket with chips hanging of her neck and have her face buried in it like a horse with bucket of water. Lol Since she can’t afford eating like that, she forces herself not to.

But I know it’s much harder when it’s around you! I ate piece of pie today at work because someone brought it to lunch. No will power.

I had sort of the same problem when I was working in the office full-time when I'd always worked from home. It was really tempting to get take-out or eat processed things that could just be heated up, because I was so tired from the commute.

I didn't really resolve it. Fortunately, I am working from home again and have more time to prepare meals. I can even get started on things during the day.

I like Divine1966's idea of prepping healthier foods in advance and freezing them to eat during the week. Maybe you can set aside some time on the weekend to shop and cook.

You're welcome. I did a quick google search and there are lots of recipes and tips for foods that you can prepare ahead.

There are also lots of ideas on line for meal that only take 30 minutes. One pan, 30 minutes and healthy. You can’t beat that!

Crock pot or insta pot is helpful.

Yeah, I have a Moulinex multicooker, which is a real help. It doesn't have the pressure function, but it is great for stuff like curries, soups, chili, rice, steaming veggies, etc. You can program it and step away for a while; you don't have to babysit it as much as when you are cooking on the stove. It's good because you can get other things done while the food is cooking, like feeding the pets or other chores. I use it a lot.

Yeah, I have a Moulinex multicooker, which is a real help. It doesn't have the pressure function, but it is great for stuff like curries, soups, chili, rice, steaming veggies, etc. You can program it and step away for a while; you don't have to babysit it as much as when you are cooking on the stove. It's good because you can get other things done while the food is cooking, like feeding the pets or other chores. I use it a lot.

Yeah, you do have to shop, true. We buy some frozen veggies, meat, fish, to have on hand. I find that early Sunday AM is the best time to head to the supermarket. Or, maybe you have online shopping options? We tried that but whenever they didn't have a product were charged anyways and had to request and wait for a refund, so we no longer order online to avoid that hassle.

When my husband and I met, he didn't cook AT ALL! When I asked him what he ate, he said takeout and pasta with jarred sauces. But, bit by bit he has learned and is quite a good cook these days. He makes his own pasta sauces these days, curry, the other day he made a lamb stew with leftovers from a barbecue we had. He's a big fan of the multicooker as well.

Maybe start off slowly, cooking one weeknight, then on to two nights.

We have an air fryer and a crock pot. The air fryer has been a life saver when craving fried foods. It gives some foods that crispy fried taste without the fat. And the crock pot..throw in all the ingredients in the morning before work and when you get home you have a hot cooked meal. No work at all-except maybe chopping a few veggies to throw in.
Also as far as shopping goes-most grocery stores now do a shop at home thing where you order your groceries from their website then they deliver it to you. This costs extra and adds a few bucks to the bill but totally worth it if you don’t have time to shop.

Thank you!! These are all helpful suggestions!