Never Been Kissed

I've never truly had an intimate relationship before. I would really like to have my first kiss, and my first real date, but is it really feasible?

I'm really starting to wonder, now..
The only times I could find a boyfriend was when I was in a relationship. It was hard to find the only two boyfriends I've ever had. Both were long-distance relationship. The first was too posessive, and I ran into my second while breaking it off with him (hard, because of threats.)

My second was wonderful, I think, but he was stuck on some other girl who had been over him. I'm furious when I see her trying to get back with him and him refusing, and then him turning around and thinking about getting back with her after the fact.He dumped me a while ago.

I miss the feeling of having a boyfriend, but I'm getting furious because no one seems to want me except the people I cannot stand. As a general history in relationships, every guy I've liked does NOT like me.

I'm the nice girl. Which is funny to me: Why do guys tend to go for the loud, mean girls? People like me get tossed into the "friends" category, with no chance of recovery. And I guess I'm too nice in my relationships, because it seems like they just get tired of me, whereas a mean girl would string the guy along and would make the relationship last longer.

I don't even know anymore. It hurts to be alone and it hurts to be rejected so often.

Lyric, Im sorry you are feeling so upset about this right now and I know it can be so hard to meet that "special" someone. I went through a time when I didn't date for a few years and I think it was because I was sending mixed signals and didn't even realize it. Who knows maybe I was afraid of being rejected like you too. (it isn't fun.)
But one thing I came to accept was that I had to be totally happy with myself before putting myself out there. Once that happened and I decided to be happy as a single, independent woman, the guys started showing interest in me. Don't get me wrong, not every man said yes or not every date became a relationship, but I was shocked that when I let it ALL go finally and just said whatever happens will happen....it was so much better.
Just concentrate on having fun with friends, or join some groups that interest you and along the way it will just happen!!!
Keep your head up and take care....

That's very sweet of you..Thanks

Well, I get made fun of constantly by all my friends, because I have never had a boyfriend, let alone I have never been kissed ^^ I know how it feels...I hate when you feel that all the guys you like, just as friends, like you more than that and the guys you do like just look at you as a friend.

Be confident in yourself. I am sure you are a wonderful person that has a lot to offer. I'm sure you will find the right one, just like me, even if it takes some time :3

my whole life I have been the brunette tomboy with the hot blonde friend. the second she would find out i liked a guy, she would go and get them. at least 4 guys that I either liked or was with, didnt want me or left me for her. it was torture all through middle school and high school. and ive found that guys like confidence, just like women do. i am loud and obnoxious haha. guys apparently see that as confident and like me. i stopped trying to be the hot blonde and became fine with being the cute brunette. i burp and watch football around them and they swoon haha so really... all men want is a boyfriend with boobs. im sure youll find someone. the heatbreak does hurt though. hasnt been that long ago for me so i do understand how you feel.

xD I never thought of it that way..But it makes a lot of sense!
I'm not one of the "hot girls" either, but I'm realistic. I'm not going to freak out if, say, I look in the mirror and have laugh lines when I'm older.
Or something like that.

^-^

I usally get called a friend.By guys i have liked in the past.Plus have had guys like me.That i don't like back.I understand and it totally sucks.I wish nobody had to deal with that.

i went through nasty break ups and cheating men before I found my one and only. When he came along I thought "oh great here is another open invitation to break my heart". But finally it didn't happen. You have to trial and error a lot sometimes to find someone.

You know I think it must be a written law or something because many guys do go for the *****es dont they! Maybe if you love yourself more it will not hurt to be alone! i am sure a man with a clue will come around soon and see just how wonderful you are.

Lyric,

I'm not sure of your age, but my daughter when thru this right around her 17th b'day (it was end of summer just before her 17th b'day).

She was everyone's friend...the one that everyone came to for the shoulder to cry on. She was consistent, caring, silly, just everybody's friend. She'd gone to the same school with the same friends her whole life. I explained to her that the impressions we make can stick with us thru school...good, bad or indifferent.

She was upset that she never really dated, had relationships, even heartbreaks. She was everyone's "bud" and that was following her in her circle of friends.

I explained that she would meet someone and he'd be about five years older than her (because she was so mature and wanted "more"), and that he wouldn't have gone to school with her.

Not 5 months later she met what is today her husband and father of her child. She reminded me of my words when they were getting serious with a shock on how spot-on I was about it.

She met her "love" who is five years older than her and who's grandmother lived down the street, but he lived about 3 hours away.

You'll find that someone and it will feel right when you do. It may or may not last, but it *will* be real...with all the wonderful, sad, amazing things that come with those intense relationships.

Love,

KD

Don't think that because your a nice person you'll get walked all over because it's not true at all!! Every guy is different, it might seem to you that the guys you have had 'do not like you', but the thing is, maybe your just going for the wrong ones?? Not everyone gets on perfectly, and if you relax and stop blaming yourself for failed relationships you'll come to find that when somebody is right for you, they'll come to you. And when you know its right, you'll know it had been worth the wait.

Hope you'll find somebody soon, and even if the next one doesn't work out, I'm sure you'll find someone else just as easily

Take care, love BabyG xxx

I can't believe that somebody else wrote this. I am dealing with exactly the same thing. I have the exact same experience as you! Including the 2 boyfriends that you mentioned.....all the same! So bizarre!

Hi

Don't be sad that you don't have a boy friend, when I got involved I really wanted to get my first kiss soon and my BF also was a good kisser. But my friends were very desperate and they wanted to have sex with their BF but those relationship's never late for long. If there is a boy who really wants you will always come to you, be behind you and will really want you. Have fun with what you have. Try for guy who u feel is best for you.. And good luck !!!!

kissing a guy isn't always great cuz i was in a relationship wit dis guy and him and i went all the way bout 8 months ago we split up but we r still friends and although he doesn't wanna b wit me he still kisses me and he knows me well enough to no i wont pull away

I've been very stupid about this in general. Just a few minutes ago, I tried to call my ex and found out he was over at his girlfriend's house for the millionth time. I remember when he told me our relationship lasted "a while" (two months). That was a while ago,though. It hurts to know he won't bother to call me, and won't even be at home to answer his damned phone!!He told me he'd still be my friend, but I feel like I'm just another extra, useless accessory in his life.

I was going to call him because I wanted to ask him what to do: I still feel in love with him. It's been over 6 months since the breakup but he was the one person who I gave my all to,only to be a temporary girlfriend. In fact, I think I lasted the least of all his girlfriends. It makes me so angry that I put my all into the relationship just to be dumped and forgotten about. He played me like a fool; to tell me the relationship would last long and to lie about how he'd wait for me.Total BS!

I've become very fed up with relationships recently and can't even stand to watch movies or shows about them. It makes me very depressed or sick with anger.I know I can't have a relationship with him again, but I just keep fooling myself.I'm a shy person; I don't bare my soul as easily as I did with him, and it hurts to do that. I wish I could just forget about him, but my thoughts about him have been haunting me every day for six months.

I no longer know what to do. Every time I think about how I screwed up and made him lose interest in me, I just start to cry. I've stopped looking and feel very much like I won't have another opportunity. It saddens me to think about possibly being alone the rest of my life.

I gave up on all men weeks ago, out of frustration. Now I'm left feeling disappointed and cheated. I don't want to give any more relationships all my energy and leave myself open to be hurt like this again, and at the same time, I can't seem to shake my feelings. I feel like I don't have a purpose anymore.

There are a lot of screwy relationships out there. But my outlook is don't let those define you, and don't let them get you down. Is it really your life's purpose to pour yourself into a relationship?

I'm a rare breed of person who doesn't see relationships as vital and necessary for success. I know, weird, huh? But really, you sound like a great friend and a caring person.
Can you focus on that?

I wish the people who used these types of forums lived near me. There are dating sites for people with depression and disabilities, but theyre spammed full of assholes. I kind of relate, being a guy its a little different. sucks though.

dont change who you really are, dont let your guard down, and dont be fake. It seems like mean girls always get the guys, but theyre normally the ones raising kids alone. Honest guys like honest girls. goodluck.

sorry if I offended anyone.

Learn to be comfortable with your own skin, then get a boyfriend.

I watched my mother feel she was incapable of living without a man by her side. She went through many men in my childhood, I mean MANY.

What her behavior has made me realize is it's okay to be alone...I'm not alone, but if I was I'd make the best of being alone and let love find me unexpectedly...looking for true love is a wasteful game. Don't take the first thing that comes alone, time is worthy in this situation.

Next time around, I will wait for love to find me. I learned a hard lesson, but one time is enough for me, rather then going through many men in my life....one is enough!

Good luck hun