[bpforever1]

Thank you! I'm going to go slowly with increasing my hours. I am having some difficulty keeping up already. I feel tired and exhausted all of the time. I am almost at 20 hours but am not worried about it now because of my feelings of exhaustion. I am working seven days a week with a few hours on some days to just half an hour per day. It is not bad but have to wake up early and work at nights too. I will persevere. On the other hand, I met a man online who I will meet next week. Nice man!! He is funny and talkative!! He works hard and is doing well. May be he will become my boyfriend, who knows! So, I am feeling ok nevertheless!!

[bpforever1]

I am getting to 20 hours and am so close that it is a nail-biting experience. I am doing well. I met the man yesterday and it went well. He is funny and interesting. I don't expect to marry him but hope we can be friends and lovers if we both have the time. My work is exhausting. I work from 6am then have a 10 hour break in between then work until about 11pm. It is not easy although I'm just working a few hours a day. My sleep schedule is off now. I feel ok today though. I am grateful that I have work. I feel blessed about my life. I am earning money and doing fine. My former psydoc said I could never get disability and it is not worth it anyways, he said. Whatever!! I have no opinion about people on it. I thought when I was really psychotic, I could get it. But, he said no. Well, it made me determined to find a job!! And, here I am working. So, not all endings are bad. I feel great!! Thank you all for your support!!

[SlumberKitty]

Glad you are doing well @bpforever1

[SlumberKitty]

I am doing pretty good. Not having as many crises.

[Breaking Dawn]

I've been doing better.

[SlumberKitty]

Yeah! That's good to hear @Breaking Dawn!

[Breaking Dawn]

Thank you, Kit! And I'm glad you are doing better, too! Even a little bit can make such a difference. Hugs & love!!

[bpforever1]

I'm doing well. I did not meet the man from Bumble again. I blocked him because he lost interest. Well, I have an online buddy, he is nice. I have a few online buddies but only one is very supportive of me!! I am happy. Tomorrow, I return to work. I will be fine. I need to prepare tonight because I start at 6am. I like my job. I took my medication, exercised, and ate healthy so far today. Tonight, I will just drink liquids. I want to lose some weight because I feel tired all of the time. I drink coffee to combat this. I am doing well and it has been about two months since I've been here. I am doing absolutely fabulous!! I have no breaks for awhile though. I hope to continue persevering. I'd like to take on as many hours as possible too. So far, I'm able to do it. But, I was getting tired! I will try to go out and exercise daily- 20 flights of stairs and eat healthy too. I am happy for once. I was truly unhappy at home with my family. Boy, they treated me like a prisoner. Thus, I don't want to return home. I understand I was depending on them financially, etc. But, I never could go out of the house by myself for the last year or so. It was awful!! Now, I'm free as a bird but need to work. It is a trade off. I like working so it is not a burden. I just have to remind myself to take my medication. Then, everything else works out just fine for me. So simple- to take medication daily. But, for me, it is quite a feat to continue being compliant. Have a good day y'all!!

[bpforever1]

I returned to work and also walked outside and went upstairs -20 flights. I feel fine. I had to wake up at 4:45am this morning. But, I took a nap already. I am doing well. I will try to eat healthy too today.

[Breaking Dawn]

Not one of my best days, but could be a lot worse & I'm glad it isn't.

[bpforever1]

I have to work today. I am going to teach straight for four hours in a row today then another hour after this. I am doing well. I took my medication this morning. I also exercised by walking outside and going up the stairs 20 flights. I feel fine. I drank my cup of coffee. I have to work until 10pm tonight, then do clerical work afterwards. It's going to be a long day today!!

[WastingAsparagus]

I wish I had more direction from my psychiatrist! He's being extremely vague these days and saying that I'll do fine with a lower dose of meds. I guess I don't believe him. It's not too good. Or maybe I'm just getting overly worried about the covid-19 situation, but I still don't know. It seems like everything is really hard these days. I kind of wish I would be able to go back on some of the meds I was on before. I hate this hands-off approach that my psychiatrist has these days. It is not good.

[bpforever1]

I got mostly good reviews but my 6am student complained about me. All we did was do introductions and she complained I talk too fast, etc. So, I have to be careful. My other evaluations were positive. I had a meeting with the manager. He said , yeah, we are happy to have you on the team but we have to accommodate our customers. It is the last time I am thinking introductions are not going to count against me. I had not even taught her yet. The student is an *****. I have to teach her still. She is a living nightmare. I say duh duh and she thinks it is a word. I can't believe she is that dumb. But, she is. Oh well, I can't win them all. I am not going to worry too much about it. I was going to tell my family but they have their own problems. So, I am just venting here. I don't think I am that bad as an employee. But, she made it sound like I was rude and uncaring. I was just doing an introduction to myself. What are you expecting? I hold your hand and we say this is A for apple B for boy. Some of these customers were taught English in school. The biggest phrase they can say is my name is duh duh. It is a shame but, I guess, this is why I have a job. What a living nightmare. I am being expected to teach her to speak conversational English. Please wish me luck!! I need it. She complains then can't even say a decent sentence. Oh well, honey!! I will be ok. She just gets on my nerves. I was trying to be friendly but must have come off as aloof? whatever, the culture here is mind boggling. I hope I don't get another customer like her again!! I had to teach other students while dealing with the manager about addressing her complaints. It was stressful but I pulled it off somehow. I hope this does not occur again!! Sometimes, things happen for a reason. But, she did not even give me a chance to show my skills as a teacher. She just went to the management and complained about me. Whatever!!I am doing well otherwise until I meet her again on Monday. Good grief!! Well, it is just a job. I will be objective and just think this way.

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

I got mostly good reviews but my 6am student complained about me. All we did was do introductions and she complained I talk too fast, etc. So, I have to be careful. My other evaluations were positive. I had a meeting with the manager. He said , yeah, we are happy to have you on the team but we have to accommodate our customers. It is the last time I am thinking introductions are not going to count against me. I had not even taught her yet. The student is an *****. I have to teach her still. She is a living nightmare. I say duh duh and she thinks it is a word. I can't believe she is that dumb. But, she is. Oh well, I can't win them all. I am not going to worry too much about it. I was going to tell my family but they have their own problems. So, I am just venting here. I don't think I am that bad as an employee. But, she made it sound like I was rude and uncaring. I was just doing an introduction to myself. What are you expecting? I hold your hand and we say this is A for apple B for boy. Some of these customers were taught English in school. The biggest phrase they can say is my name is duh duh. It is a shame but, I guess, this is why I have a job. What a living nightmare. I am being expected to teach her to speak conversational English. Please wish me luck!! I need it. She complains then can't even say a decent sentence. Oh well, honey!! I will be ok. She just gets on my nerves. I was trying to be friendly but must have come off as aloof? whatever, the culture here is mind boggling. I hope I don't get another customer like her again!! I had to teach other students while dealing with the manager about addressing her complaints. It was stressful but I pulled it off somehow. I hope this does not occur again!! Sometimes, things happen for a reason. But, she did not even give me a chance to show my skills as a teacher. She just went to the management and complained about me. Whatever!!I am doing well otherwise until I meet her again on Monday. Good grief!! Well, it is just a job. I will be objective and just think this way.

I'm sorry you got a bad review. I also teach and sometimes those reviews can be extremely frustrating, especially when they're for "trial lessons" or things of the like. I absolutely abhor when students give me bad reviews. I empathize with that... Just saying.

[bpforever1]

Thank you, wasting asparagus. Yes, it was just had an initial introduction with her and she complained. Oh well, I'll keep it in mind but am not too worried about it anymore. She is mean, probably is frustrated she is spending all of this money, but is not learning that much. I will do my best to teach her and hope she learns something.


I am doing well. I woke up late but have a class this afternoon. I am fine. I will go out shopping today afterwards. I am feeling somewhat relaxed and happy.

[bpforever1]

I taught the same student again this morning. She seemed more receptive. Hopefully, she did not write management about any miscommunication again! I don't think so. I believe, I did a good job today. I am feeling fine too. I walked outside and went up 20 flight of stairs. I am going to have a positive attitude. I am doing well!!

[bpforever1]

The manager asked me about the student again. I said it went well. I have not heard from him since. I should get feedback soon though. I am not too worried about it because I am doing the best I can. I feel great! I walked outside and went up 20 flight of stairs. I also am eating healthy. I sleep well. I feel fine!! Life is not bad. The weather is muggy here though. It is slightly uncomfortable but have the fan on.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm tired but doing ok.

[bpforever1]

I seem to be doing a good job. The assistant manager said people like me, They said good things about me. Well, after receiving a complaint, accolades and encouragement are nice to hear!! I feel fine. My computer had a glitch and all my microsoft apps stopped working. I was going insane!! But, I figured it out and reset my computer. It did the trick!! I am doing well again!! Life is not so bad. I am grateful for my blessings and the fact that although bad things happen to me, I overcome them and carry on with not much problems. I am happy that my students like me though!! It is like a popularity contest too! I am going to be ok and look forward to working these days.

[SlumberKitty]

Today I am anxious. I just took some xanax though. So it should calm down.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok. Another new student gave me a good review!! I'm doing fine, I guess. I was really stressed out yesterday because my computer crashed and almost lost all of my data and other apps. It was difficult trying to figure out what to do. I slept on my break time. I was so tired! I will exercise tomorrow again. I went to bed at 1 am last night after doing clerical work. I was exhausted all day today. But, after sleeping during my break, I feel fine. I took my medication and am doing well!! I am grateful for this job but don't like the popularity contest conditions. I'm thinking about going back to school and getting a real job afterwards. This job is ok but the hours are not good and there are no benefits. It is not a good situation!!

[Breaking Dawn]

I am doing much better this morning. And I'm grateful for that.

[WastingAsparagus]

I'm doing okay today. Haven't done a ton of work today, but just have been lazy around the house all day. It's fine. I have been extremely busy as of late. I don't feel that busy but I've been able to do a lot lately. I think it's good to keep my mind occupied during these times and usually. I feel like I've learned something about myself during these tough times, which is that I need to keep my mind occupied. That on top of some med changes lately and I've been doing pretty well. I've also been writing a ton, which is good as well.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok. I went outside to walk and went up 20 flight of stairs. I was thinking about volunteering for a suicide hotline when I have the time. I have to get training of course though. I want to look into other jobs with benefits. I have a science degree and want to use it for something useful. I don't want to do psychology but counseling sounds decent to me. I can help people and educate them as well. I like helping people and talking to them. Teaching is fine but I know my job is a dead end job. It is nice to have a job and will do it for a year or two. However, I am thinking I can't continue this way until I retire. I can't even retire!!! lol, I don't make enough. I want to so some thing in counseling and science. I thought about nursing also. But, it is not a good fit for me. I have done medical work and realized I don't like the lifestyle. I will look into science and counseling. I'm sure there is some thing I can do still. I feel great but after the complaints from a student, it really opened my eyes and made me think about my future. I don't like this popularity contest aspect of my company. Sometimes, it is just a personality conflict. But, the company sided with the customer, not me. I felt hurt and know the bottom line is profit for the company, not me as a person. I am doing an overall good job they say. But, I don't appreciate being thought of as a cog in a wheel- just a gadget or a tool. I am not mad but am happy to have insight into my current job situation. Sometimes, things happen for a reason!! I will search for the answers to my situation.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi, everybody! I suspect we need each other because we are kind of weird. But it's possible all of us are just plain ol' special & feel the Universal love & understanding that we all need