[Deilla]

I am sad.

[SlumberKitty]

Originally Posted by Deilla

I am sad.

HUGS Deilla.
You wanna talk about it?

[Deilla]

Every night I get sad. My day can be okay and when nighttime comes around, I get really sad. If I use my sunlamp, I'm just sad and awake.

[Brego]

Quit smoking, and I feel more than one hundred percent better. I think that I should have stayed quit in 2020 after that one year of being quit. It would probably have been a reason I would have stayed negative on the COVID results. Alas, I am positive because of the smoking. Smoking is known to decrease immune system functioning. I really know I was a dipshit.

[bpforever1]

I am doing ok. I got another job as a sales/real estate agent and as a teacher for the staff. I am doing fine, I guess. I am tired though. And, it is cold. So, I will bundle up and take a nap now. I am compliant and am doing ok mentally. I hope all of you here have a Happy Holiday Season!! Please take care of yourselves. And, do what you want in life since it is too short to be unhappy with what you are doing. Blessings!

[Deilla]

It's Christmas and I'm all alone. My family doesn't care. No one invited me over for Christmas. I just don't matter.

[bpforever1]

Happy New Year!!! Please stay warm and healthy. Enjoy life!

[Deilla]

I'm getting by. It's difficult right now, but I'm making it. I'm grocery shopping today and my sister is going to the food bank. She will give me the food she can't eat like bread, pasta, oatmeal and coffee. So it will be nice. I go through a lot of coffee. I drink iced coffee all day.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

Happy New Year!!! Please stay warm and healthy. Enjoy life!

The same to you, dear friend!

[SlumberKitty]

Hallucinations, hallucinations, hallucinations. Maybe I should take an Olanzapine.

[bpforever1]

I hope everybody had a pleasant New Year's Day!!! Happy New Year! I actually slept through it and woke up late. I feel great though. I turned down the real estate job since I have to pay fees to earn a commission. I am looking for another teaching job instead. I figured I'd rather get paid than pay for something that may not return to me. I am happy! I am healthy, stable, independent, and free. I am poor but am doing well with what little I have. So, blessings to you all!! Please hang in there. Hopefully, life will improve for all of us and we can be happy with what we have.

[Breaking Dawn]

All things considered I think I'm actually doing better, & I'm feeling encouraged at the moment.

[Deilla]

Things aren't going well for me. People are letting me down and I'm not good enough. I feel angry. It's BS.

[SlumberKitty]

Sorry, Deilla. I hope things are better today! HUGS Kit

[SlumberKitty]

Struggling to feel.........acceptable today.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Struggling to feel.........acceptable today.

Dear @SlumberKitty, This makes me feel so sad! You should be one of the least likely to feel unacceptable, at least here in our MSF family! Everyone I know here looks up to you & loves you! I love you, too! Please don't believe those untrue thoughts that have hurt you! OK?

[Deilla]

I'm lowering my expectations. People who I thought were friends aren't really friends. They're just acquaintances. So low, low, low, low, lower my expectations. Even my family doesn't love me. I have no one who cares.

[SlumberKitty]

HUGS Deilla. I'm sorry you are hurting. You have us.

[Deilla]

Thank you for the hugs. They help. I do have you guys. I'm going through a hard time. And I can't find a sympathetic ear. I have my therapist. I guess I should count my blessings that I have that much. I'm at a low in my life. I don't know where my next meal is coming from. I don't know if I can afford medicine. I don't know if I can take care of my cats. I need a miracle. I need the doctor's office to give me samples of my medicine. I need food more. If I don't get the samples, I won't take the medicine.

Edit: I need a way to stop negative thoughts.

[SlumberKitty]

Hugs @Deilla

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok. I am still working and surviving. I am hibernating a little since the number of infected cases is rising here. I feel ok overall. I chipped my tooth and have been going to the dentist daily to fix my teeth in general. I had not gone to the dentist in two years and well, it's a mess in my mouth. So, I have been busy cleaning and fixing my teeth now. I was afraid to go to the dentist here since well I'm stupid. Now, I'm paying the price for it. At least my health insurance pays for some of the treatment so the payments are not too bad. I got my teeth cleaned and it feels so different in my mouth. I have to say it was yucky before. I will keep on top of this to ensure I won't have the same problems. I am happy the health insurance covers some treatment here. Overall, I am doing fine. My mental health is stable- knock on wood. I feel blessed nevertheless. I am healthy in general and am not depressed. I am grateful for what I have and enjoy the little things in life.

[Deilla]

I'm feeling very sad and lonely. I have my cats. I will go to bed early and sleep with them. It's the highlight of my day.

[Breaking Dawn]

Voices were nicer today, but my mood & energy were low. I did manage to accomplish an impotant goal, though. I hope tomorrow I will be able to accomplish more.

[SlumberKitty]

I'm depressed.

[Deilla]

I'm feeling very depressed. I'm afraid I may end up in the hospital.