Roll call

Here. I slept so-so. I feel better about myself and the world today, than usual. I think I'm growing into a more capable adult. It feels good.

Here and okay.

Here. I'm OK.

well my headache is back and now i have a bad infection
hope my day gets better

here and OK.

spent the whole day in bed yesterday
still feeling puffy this am ut im sure will be a better day

Feeling better, and sorry for being such a jerk last week. Working on implementing a plan to fix some things - hope I will stay motivated to get it done.

Here. Been doing so well lately. Got back to gym last week, and been working out daily. Today I woke up feeling like lead. Ugh! Possibly the antibiotics are taking it out of me. Time to take the pressures of life off a bit and try again another day.

I've been trying to be more physically active for the past couple of months. I'm also feeling like lead some mornings. I thought exercise was supposed to make one feel more energetic.

I feel good, tired though. Couldn't sleep last night. I'll get by today. I'll take a few naps.

I'm new to this forum. I think I'm ready to face my fears--open up and talk about my psychosis. I'm nervous and a little embarrassed. I mean heck, who takes boards and boards shut their doors because people are trying to get in?

Hi DPM, I hope you find this forum helpful. Everyone else, sorry I've been away (not sure how long I've been gone for) I'm back and doing okay.

I feel refreshed after a lot of struggles

I have been pulled out of the muck and the myer

I have renewed my faith and strength

Really glad you're back, mgran. I was worried about you.

glad to see you Mgran... was wondering where you were

[DePressMe you said "I mean heck, who takes boards and boards shut their doors because people are trying to get in?]

What do you mean? I guess Im just ignorant ;0(

lil-angel-wings, I took the boards and nailed shut my doors with them.

i understand

I had visions of nailing boards to my head to prevent creatures from contaminating my thoughts... then in a moment of sheer brilliance I figured that just keeping my mouth shut would deal with 90% of thought leaks...
The thought contamination / implanting needed something less strange to attract less attention. I just couldn't come up with a design that worked, and motorbike helmets were completely useless. I figured how antipsychotics worked - they dulled the mind so much that nothing could be thought anyway. Its kind of like making a host inhospitable to a pathogen. So I decided to not think in words - just visions. It sort of worked most of the time. The down side was I then had difficulty talking and writing.

Boarding up the doors isn't something I have done lately. Our windows are full of cottage panes and there are no burglar bars. I lock doors religiously, but it is all false security. For me the threats have all been a lot more nebulous than physical break-ins.

I hope you manage to find something that helps you feel more secure.

Recently I've been struggling against an urge to use gaffer tape to seal all the external doors, but I've managed not to. It's usually a result of feeling very excluded and unsafe in your own environment that makes people take such measures... what has been going on in your life to make you feel unsafe? If you can figure out what that is then you can fight the impulse.

HERE sir.

I feel good and rested today. I had a helpful conversation today while having coffee at a local store. I had a disagreement with someone yesterday about a very controversial topic. I had a friendly conversation with this person today. I feel relieved.

very bad step one done. whew.

here and stuggling

one day good

one day bad

both i will give thanks for

Hi all! I've had a pretty mellow day. I'm thankful for that...

Here. Sounds are echoing around me and eating into my skull. Yesterday I had such horrible akathisia I didn't know what to do with myself. A soothing shower and no clothes for a few hours helped. The crickets last night needed volume control
Just managed to bill 1 hour of my time. (airpunch)

Here sir

I slept a few hours.

Not enough, but the dialogue in my mind is not allowing me to sleep. I'm worried about my wife who is in the hospital. I feel I'm hurting from wounds I've been numbing for years, decades even. I wish I could fast forward my life.