Roll Call 17

Oh Willow,
Dont feel guily for somethong you did not understand. Now that you see things are different than you thought, just be there for her and your dad. I hope your mom will be okay. Im sure this is scary for you amd we will be here for you hun. (((hugs)))

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...and Newtus, you are missed.

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i painted a picture frame for toby today

i just got out of the hospital. my therapist called the sherriff on me and they took me to greenoaks dallas. it was very stressfull. i was put in a waiting room with 30 beds lined up and you couldnt move around and was just hard on me.

thats what im talking about being honest where it gets me.

im not happy right now cause the stress caused me migraine but they added a antidepressant to my regimen

I'm sorry you're still feeling bad...but I'm hoping the antidepressant works out for you....I think though you were saying yourself that you needed to go in...did they at least send you to the facility you wanted?

Did they give you any steps to take to make your home more safe....we all want you to be here tomorrow and the next day as well...

no they didnt send me to the one i wanted at all. they didnt care.
and no they didnt give me any steps.

i was basically in a waiting room for the whole time and then they sent mee home with meds.

I love this!!!

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You have got to be friggin kidding me.
Im so sorry newtus. I hope at least the antidepressants help you.....your T probibly meant well amd was worried about you but dang!

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That seems totally pointless I mean you could have gotten an AD from your pdoc on Tuesday or Wednesday....maybe this is a good reason to change treatment teams? This doesn't sound very effective...at least from where I'm sitting...

yea i am changing treatment providers. i told my therapist not to call the sheriffs but she did. oh well. im home now...

the most important thing to me was that my dad said he wasnt mad at me for being honest and that he hopes i get some good medicine.

my migraines gone along with my nausea. now i know it was stress induced. due to being put through all that.

the police put chains around my waist and arms. ugh. hate e police

What anti depressant did they give you?

You know I have no idea why we do this to people who are suicidal....it's not like they are inherently dangerous to others...why get the cops involved at all...I really don't understand the laws surrounding this...I think they archaic based on religion and don't actually help people...

I mean I honestly don't even understand the concept at all...

they put me on celexa

Ah, I've been on that before. It didn't help for me but I know other people who took it and it helped them.

i didnt think i really needed to be in the hostpial i just said i was a little depressed.

Hmm, maybe being in the environment and everything that was going on distracted you from your depression? You said you were suicidal earlier. There have been times I've gone in the hospital and then everything didn't seem "bad".

Cooking up a storm this weekend...rocky road ice cream with hazelnuts almonds, marshmallow, white and dark chocolate

Cinnamon raisin bread pudding

Cannellini beans with greens with tomato onion and smoked paprika and to go with that I'm making goat cheese biscuits..

My car didn't start this morning so I had to walk up to the store for all that stuff...the hood was frozen shut so I couldn't even jumpstart it...waiting until it thaws on Wednesday to get the car started...

well this wasnt a good place to be. they had severe drug addicts and fights regularly. they kept calling a code purple which is a fight. every 10 min.

the hospital didnt distract me from depression. the environment only made me more depressed cause they wouldn let us walk around. only lay in beds all day in 30 bed room full of 30 people. so it was hectic and made me nervous.

Ah, hope the store wasn't that far of a walk. Especially in the cold.

About a mile but I can get the heaviest part(milk) at the 7-11 that's just on the corner...

I guess what I mean that the hectic environment made your depression not seem as bad. I can understand being nervous with fights braking out every 10 mins.

The Darkness descends upon me (and my family) in this cursed land of hell, nothing will raise me up into the happy world of "everything's great." We are cursed. That's all. Hell surrounds my fire eyes of death. I can't withstand any more hellish pain. Its my fault. I know it is. I said last year that this year will be far worse than last, and the year before. I literally can't catch a breath between all the hell. I wish I can say everything's great for us. Its not. Mom still dies away in pain and suffering with no ending in sight. Today a pipe broke. What a shocker! I am constantly hearing about the Olympics and how there is not much other news. Nothing. We have no water in our house right now. This is while the world seems fine and dandy as on the news. I have a feeling more bad news will come while its fine in the world. We still have to move, and its moving down in the world. Financially we will fail. We cannot sustain this rate of repairs with our income. Look at the stock market. Going up, while my dad's company never sees recovery. I mean the company he works at. Every single bleeping time something appears "good" it turns into a mess or negative. I am still waiting for this deal that was promised to us and a contract for my brother's company. The company that is promising us this contract to buy some of my brother's apps nothing's happened and the original promise was all the way back in last April. Not one single positive has happened that turned out to be true. Our family has had countless hopes but every single one of them has crashed down upon us with the Devil. OK.