Roll Call 24

So right before I had some form of actual increasing psychosis for a brief few weeks (basically in denial with little insight until my appointment), I listened to this song and almost cried because it means a lot to me, my childhood and where I grew up. I rarely ever do cry though. Right before I took my antipsychotics again, I listened and felt absolutely nothing. It's getting better now but takes a while.

I don't usually tell people much about myself but I just thought that it would be interesting for people here to know that.

I want Bean off this med.
Its not working and she is acting like a savage beast zombie.
ugg. Gotta wait until we see pdoc next monday to wean off with blood tests!

sorry to hear about bean. i can understand you wanting her off this med. especially if shes not acting right.

Its making her very nasty to be around and giving her bipolar symptoms. I cant believe this!

Laughing this creepy laugh for like, 2 minutes, then crying, then yelling at me all at the same time! Never seen anything like it.

Im beginning to see its the meds. I thought at first maybe she needs to adjust to being home after being in hospital for 2 months. Maybe, but something is not right with her.

She cant even have a simple conversation without getting mad and agitated.

i couldnt imagine being in the hospital for more than 3 days but longest ive been is a month. usually 8 days. i cant imagine 2 months. or more.

it might be the meds

Poor bean and you guys too sorry it's not working out. It sounds pretty scary to deal with I hope her blood results are okay *hugs*

She wont be going back for a long time.
I will deal with it at home before putting her back in hospital.
Once she is in one, I have no say in anything. Im not a control freak at all but I know my child. State hospitals take all your rights away. THEY decide how long she stays and what they will do. Its not always the right way.

I still believe hospitals are valuable for treatment and medication....what im saying is that we are going to wait as long as we can from now on before having to make this type of decision.

I was told to seek help for her when psychosis first starts to minimize the hospital stay. Forget it. It doesnt work. I will wait until I absolutely have to for her safety. The school will support me if she is absent a lot.

This was a "Pyrrhic victory"
Actually, no. It wasn't even that.......

if you dont mind me asking... how do you afford all these hospital stays...

i was just wondering because i cant afford mine and thats partly why i cant go they are thousands of dollars for a few days alone.

in england they have the nhs and they keep u in hosp for as long as they want.

I bet since Bean is under 18 she probably gets Medicaid. Medicaid pays for it all. They may also have other mental health programs in Punky's area too. You know how we have North Star here, they might have that. State hospitals usually have some sort of support system set in place.

I'm sorry you didn't sleep well. I didn't take a sleeping pill last night. So my sleep was terrible and the bad dreams came again when I finally did sleep some. I don't want to have to take a sleeping pill every night just to sleep and avoid the bad dreams. I'm so sick and tired of the bad dreams! When I do take a sleeping pill I sleep very solid and don't remember having any dreams. I might have to take one tonight. Ugh!

oh probably so. when i went to greenoaks they put me under northstar to pay for it so i prob dont have to pay for it under medicare. idk. i hope not.

i always take a sleeping pill. but never works. weirdly ever since i been taking that ambien i cant sleep. it doesnt make me sleep it makes me woozy and drunk-like thats all.

Punky I'm very, very sorry that Bean isn't doing well. I understand how you feel about that hospital though. It's a very hard situation to be in. Just know that we are here for you Hang in there!

Maybe North Star will pay for the portion that your Medicare doesn't cover. I'm really not sure how they'll do it but hopefully you won't receive a bill.

I just started taking the over the counter Unisom sleeping pills. I've only taken them three times. I take the pill and then lay down with my eyes closed and relax my body. Within about 30 minutes I feel it and I fall asleep very fast. The best part so far is I don't remember dreaming.


Many years ago I took Trazodone. I took that every night for about four months. That stuff put me out quick but then the next day I'd feel like I had a hangover. I hated that part.

I like this:

I think you would qualify for medicaid

Medicaid is different in Texas. You can only get it if your pregnant where we live.

yea they only said i could get it if i was pregnant. i tried already.

[badadvice] you should totally get pregnant than [/badadvice]

yea i totally dont want to.

Thank u for that. I absolutely love The Cranberries.

I'm really, really sorry.