Roll Call 28

Or hearing the neighbors stomp up and down their stairs or slam their doors or come home drunk at 2am and bang on their door because they forgot their key......this is all recent mess I've had to put up with! I totally hate city life!!!

I want to be a suburban/urban girl. Someone come buy my house. It's a nice house with lots of land lol. No really, it's for sale. Come buy it.

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My weekend went well I didnt see those people who watch me and follow me not sure what was up with that but it made me feel a little better not to see them.

I wish I could!

That's the problem now a days. No one's buying. How can I move to my mom's house if I can't sell mine. It's not in condition to be rented.

I'm glad you had a good weekend and are feeling better!

I prefer the city. I don't mind the police/ambulance sirens and the ghetto birds. Everything is close by and if not there's always public transportation.

You know when I was younger I lived in the country for many years and I hated it. I couldn't wait to move to the city. So I finally did and have lived the city life for quiet a few years now.....and guess what....I hate it!!! I want the country life back so badly! It's funny how you change as you get older! When I was younger I was all about going, going, going...now that I'm older I just want to stay home, have peace and quiet and be left alone. Nature sounds I long for, people sounds I could do without! Lol!

Lol, I grew up the urban life and in a pretty bad area as well. But when I was 13 we moved to the suburbs in a nice area. What sucked was that no one my age was outside and everyone here seemed to be indoors compared to the area I once lived in. As I got older I wanted to go somewhere I would have to ask my mom to drive me (and boy does she complain) and she refuses to teach me to drive. I'm stuck inside with nothing to do and no friends near by. Suburban life sucks when you can't drive.

Oh people are buying. Around here. People want this house. They're just cheap bastards trying to screw us over. There was a realtor that we met with wanted us to list it waaaaay under what it's actually worth because he had a buyer (and apparently we discovered a reputation of screwing people over). We did have someone almost buy it, but the bank was bulllshit and wouldn't give them a mortgage.

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I miss hanging Hummingbird feeders in the tree and watching those beautiful birds eat. And watching the Cardinals take a bath in the bird bath. I love the birds, especially the Cardinals and the Blue Jays!

I hate city driving but driving in the country doesn't bother me. City driving gives me serious anxiety and driving on the city highways sends my anxiety out the roof!

Would your step dad teach you to drive?

When I asked he was mostly worried about his SUV brakes not working properly. Now he has a truck but I don't think he'll let me drive his truck.

Does your mother have a vehicle that he could teach you to drive in?

Yeah but my stepdad doesn't ride in my moms car for some reason. When the family goes out we use his truck.

Oh ok. We have a Ford Expedition. It's huge and has tons of room. Drinks tons of gas too! Lol!

I just had a cardinal here 5 minutes ago on my balcony...you just have to feed them....

Oh that's so cool! They are such beautiful birds! Fascinating!

Lol my stepdad has a ford. Though his dad gave him the truck after the SUV (an Oldsmobile) pretty much became too much money to fix.

Yeah they have a special meaning to my family because my grandma used to love them....they would nest in her yard every year and once she had to rescue a fledgling that crashed into a window....he was fine but we all got to see him up close...

She passed away when I was in high school and now whenever people in the family see a cardinal they believe she is watching over us...

Yeah I love my big truck. I just hate the gas cost.

I believe that is true

My mom's car is good on gas. I don't know about my stepdad's truck but it's better than nothing.

well i went to see T. we talked about the homeless guy situation and why i didnt say no. cuz i wanted to say no but wanted to avoid confrontation. he brought up my fear of him dying and asked me what that means to me. he asked if i am afraid to care about new people in fear of them dying. i said i think a lot about people i know dying and feel like i wouldnt be able to handle it emotionally. but i couldnt answer if i avoid caring about new people because i just didnt know. then we talked about social anxiety and how i want to take online classes this semester. and about how i put my guard up around new people and also how i feel embarrassed about my mental illness. he said it was good to see me and i told him im glad he is feeling better.

we are gonna meet with pdoc on Thursday at noon.

i came home and fell asleep for 3 hours. now i have to go to work at 5 to 9 but they will probably ask me to stay til 9:30. but then im off tuesday and wednesday.

This is a picture of the house I live in.