Roll Call 36

junkDNA · Oct 07, 2014, 09:00 PM

i took my meds so im gonna go to bed soon. i met with T today this morning. we talked a lot about my paranoia and some coping strategies. but its so hard to utilize them when it happens. its like i lose all reasoning and logic. i want so bad to get a handle on this. im seeing the other T tomorrow morning so i can talk to him abt it. i just need to get thru tonight

junkDNA · Oct 07, 2014, 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

They may perceive that you're not interested and be responding to that, I don't know....you should ask your T about this aspect of it in addition to the e-mail.

honestly i think thats what it is. i think i just give off a vibe that im stuck up or a b tch and that i dont like anyone. ive gotten a lot of feedback from people that i intimidate them at first. but really im just shy. its kind of funny bc im also thinking that they dont like me and that they are b tches. maybe its a way to protect myself. idk

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I saw that episode. They barely discussed how she got her schizophrenia diagnosis. They also had a woman on there who had a schizoaffective diagnosis... or was it schizophrenia? I don't know. As for Jani he mention how she has a "flight of ideas". Her diagnosis is controversial. You see a lot of people thinking she may be autistic or possessed by demons, or a product of her upbringing.

hm. thats very suspect to me. because when she was on oprah i suspected she was autistic at first. and then i notice that as a child she buys a lot into what her parents tell her when they tell her she has schizophrenia.

Lillybird90 · Oct 07, 2014, 09:09 PM

My lsd side effects lasted 3 and a half days I felt so terrible then I came down with some sort of flu and was sick from that for a while but I think I am going to be ok now.I still dont totally feel quite myself though.

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lillybird90

My lsd side effects lasted 3 and a half days I felt so terrible then I came down with some sort of flu and was sick from that for a while but I think I am going to be ok now.I still dont totally feel quite myself though.

are you ok?

Oct 07, 2014, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I'm also debating on whether or not to start dating anyone before getting any better with my mental health. Lol... the boy I'm dating is only 20. I got 4 years on him. He's a nice guy. Just can't drink with him just yet lol.

It's good that he's on his own and such. Maybe sex will increase your confidence? Then again you don't want a relationship with just sex. Lol I don't blame you on not wanting to date a redneck. I prefer my nerdy friends.

But I don't feel comfortable. I've gotta be healthier.

The_little_didgee · Oct 07, 2014, 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by junkDNA

i dont even want to work in the deli. i just want to know why she shook her head no. i want to know what she was thinking. i just assume its all negative. i dont understand what it is about me that causes this. im shy i know that but it just seems like everyone else has such an easier time connecting and making friends with people there. even ppl who got hired after me are all buddy buddy with each other. when i clocked in this woman invited the other cashier to her house for dinner. i felt jealous. it wasnt even because i wanted to go to her house. even if she would have asked me i would have made up an excuse and say no. i feel like such a loser when im here. everyones standing around talking and joking and laughing and there i am looking at my nails or trying to pretend to be busy. this has been a theme thru all my life. i guess it got a little better when i came to the program im in. but now that im on my own again its coming back. its just wearing me down so much. i dont know how much more i can handle

I really feel for you.

Socializing is something I could never figure out. You are definitely not alone.

Oct 07, 2014, 09:24 PM

Whistling in my ear, like not chirpy whistling but more like the wind kind of whistle, only I'm in my bed and it's right by my ear! Really scary, anyone experience this? It's new to me!

Might be tinnitus, though it doesn't feel like it's coming from my in my ear like a ringing in your ear, hmmm!

Oct 07, 2014, 09:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lillybird90

My lsd side effects lasted 3 and a half days I felt so terrible then I came down with some sort of flu and was sick from that for a while but I think I am going to be ok now.I still dont totally feel quite myself though.

I'm a little bit afraid to try it, was it your first time? Glad you're getting back to normal!

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 09:38 PM

i think lsd is one drug i just wouldnt try. idk why. prob cause its already a psychedelia drug to begin with

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 10:08 PM

i hope i sleep tonight

Erti · Oct 07, 2014, 10:11 PM

I'm sleepy but I don't want to walk upstairs and go to bed. I normally sleep downstairs but my sister took my spot and my blanket.

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I'm sleepy but I don't want to walk upstairs and go to bed. I normally sleep downstairs but my sister took my spot and my blanket.

i just took some Zzzquil. its nyquils version of a sleep aid. i took it yesterday but stayed awake through it. hope it works tonight. makes me feel like jelly.

Erti · Oct 07, 2014, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

i just took some Zzzquil. its nyquils version of a sleep aid. i took it yesterday but stayed awake through it. hope it works tonight. makes me feel like jelly.

My mom takes that to help her sleep. It helps her but I don't think it would work for those who have serious sleep issues in general.

newtus · Oct 07, 2014, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

My mom takes that to help her sleep. It helps her but I don't think it would work for those who have serious sleep issues in general.

yea it doesnt really help me. i have to drink half the bottle anyway just to get calm. but still no sleep with it unfortunately.

neil w · Oct 08, 2014, 04:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chickenfoot

my macbook is electrocuting me!

half man, half macbook, doomed to wander the fringes of society....

newtus · Oct 08, 2014, 05:06 AM

nope. cant sleep. again...

Lillybird90 · Oct 08, 2014, 06:35 AM

yeah it was my first time and I really didnt know I had taken it because I had some alcohol prior to it and was a little drunk and some friends I know offered it to me and stupid me decided to take it. If I had been sober I would have said no. I just need to not hang around those people when or if drinking they do some wild stuff sometimes and I cant afford to let that happen to myself again.

Gr3tta · Oct 08, 2014, 07:32 AM

@Junkdna ~ i find a great way to start friendly conversations is with a compliment. Such as telling a cowoket you like her shoes, then where did she buy them, what other stores does she like? Which stores are your favourites? Etc... I use this technique to get along better with people in the workplace all the time.

newtus · Oct 08, 2014, 08:00 AM

i only slept about 3 hours last night. :/ i have NOT been sleeping this past week.

neil w · Oct 08, 2014, 08:10 AM

glad you survived your lsd trip lillybird. LSD is a very dangerous substance even if your mind isnt in a fragile state. I was never the same again after my experiments with it.

newtus · Oct 08, 2014, 08:28 AM

i feel like my family is just constantly pushing me over the edge and pushing me to uncomfortable situations all the time. like the concert situation how my mom and sister told me to face my fears and go to a concert at night even though i thought i would be killled or raped at night. they kept pushing me to go.

i wanna cry rigght now. i feel very uncomfortable.

i need my xanax right now and i dont have any left and this time i took it exactly how i was supposed to and i still didnt have any left.

i feel like im going to have a panic attack