Roll Call 53

That sounds terrible. I hope you'll feel much better soon.

id say when i was a teen i tried harder to fit in because i was very much bullied and picked on and threatened and i feared for my life and i didnt want to be in that position.

nowadays and especially after high school i dont care about where i fit in but my style still remains dark and broody.

i like fashion but i always go towards darker styles. i liked punk when i was a teen but now id like to blend in more. i dont want to be dying my hair red or blue anymore. thats why i opted out of getting piercings on my face. i still retain some of the fashion of it though like i have my ears stretched. i still wear skulls and stripes and plaid.

i have these one pairs of pains where 1 leg is black and the other leg is plaid. another pair of pants where one leg is black - the other red. etc.

My day has been okay. I still feel like I'm not living just existing but I'm getting used to it.

i havent had any voices since ive been sleeping ok. ive been sleeping pretty good. its hard to fall asleep at night right now but once i fall asleep im asleep. so thats good. sometimes i wake up.

my paranoia has been managable. so thats good. but its still there. i fear driving for the most part.

my anxiety is still really bad but no panic attacks this past week. just anxiety attacks. meaning just anxiety but no full blown panic. which would send my paranoia into full blown.

I'm glad the worst of your symptoms are gone although I wish they would all go away....

Nice walk this morning ^^







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me too.
im surprised they arent here right now considering the amount of school work im having to do. im under some deadlines since school is almost out. i have a week left to finish my term paper and even though im 3/4 of the way through i dont have my thesis explanation done yet. the part where i argue my thesis. my side. idk what to write. i dont feel in the mood for writing after all the coffee i drank. i feel too wired and probably also burnt out from school a bit.

im doing summer school but not til mid july. so ill have 2 months off from school before i go back. im just burnt out from writing not just in philosophy but mostly from writing in history. im worried about what id have to do in english class now. or even government. but then theres math...
all these classes i havent done yet...

I know you have fashion sense from the photo's you uploaded from your sisters wedding, your outfit was awesome, still quite dark. If I had your figure I'd totally get that outfit. I'm currently at a weight where I can't really find any nice clothes that I like so I'm just wearing baggy jeans, rock band t shirts and plaid shirts over them. I'm trying to get back down to a decent weight so I can start dressing better.

Don't worry too much about mathematics there's so many resources online and you can even send some of your problems to me to help you work them out. Math is always the devil of modules but if I got through three maths modules in college anyone can.

Thanks newtus and Angelique for the well wishes. Went back to bed, feeling slightly better now though I'm still really tired.

Sounds like a bit of a bug. Wrap up, make a cup of tea with sugar with some toast to get some food and sugar back into your system. That's what my mammy would always do for us when we were sick. Nothing too heavy or you'll be seeing it again

oh yea when i was heavier i was dressing not in my outfits id like. i only been able to in the past two-three months. since february. but since ive been in the 120s really. im really short so the weight takes a worse toll faster. i tend to put weight on in my stomach and thighs too which makes it worse.

but they say the average woman is a size 14 pants so idk? at least in the usa so idk?

I guess that's where I'm lucky, I'm fairly average height like 5''8 or something like that so my weight doesn't really stick to one area, I carry it well. I don't look as big as I weight. I'm still not comfortable with it though so I'd like to lose it and go back to my normal which varied between a 14 and a 16.

Can the stapler be a Swingline? Because it doesnt bind up as much... I believe you have my stapler..

God it feels good to be a gangster!

On Friday, I'm going to steal the printer that doesn't work and have a moment with it.. and a baseball bat.

ADHD: I'm very hyper right now
Schiz: with no motivation.
OCD: I have motivation.. Stop ignoring me stop ignoring me stop ignoring me stop ignoring me wait wait omg make sure that glass is half full .. What are you doing!! Don't drink it all or something bad will happen!

OMG I want some Papa John's pizza right now, fresh, hot, extra sauce, pineapple, bacon and ham

oh im 5"2

its so funny when its a vine and it has a cat in it too!

They brought a dog into my unit cuz it's therapeutic.

Das gud

I just have to remind myself that the world is amazing and there's so much to experience under these negative symptoms.. I'll never kill myself.

I consider myself to be normal once I get into the momentum of enjoying life like I should.

I'm not going to accept anhedonia and schizophrenia seriously because it got me no where.

Fml

What kind of dog?

It's a medium sized and hairy like the dog sledding in Alaska idk the name.

Husky? Those are cute...we have a couple of miniature dogs I sometimes see in the hospital...one looks like a mini lassie....