Safe Place

Thank you! I'm so glad you have mostly quit smoking.

My mood has been up and down daily. Crying and drinking. Hyper and almost impulsively stealing a running car. I feel in the back of my mind like they are watching me. Following me.

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Sorry you feel unwell, hope you feel better soon

I feel so lonely.. But hell, eagles don't flock, pigeons do.

Hope you feel better soon 12PM

I am dreading the holidays with my extended family. When I was psychotic I belied one of them was harvesting my children's organs for her grandchild. Unfortunately it didn't stop with just that belief. I also went to another family members house and made quite a scene so much so that they called the police on me. And then called the family member I was angry with about my "condition. Two days later I went inpatient and the relative that called the police on me went on to tell this family member about my hospitalization. I am a very private person IRL so these things really went up my ***. I now have to see them all at one time. I would rather be back at the hospital that deal with them. I know they laughed at me an obvious sign that they know nothing about mental illness and nothing about me. If my gram wasn't so old I'd skip it all together. Also i need to remember that no one IRL understands what I've been through. The kind of hell where you believe someone is trying to kill your children. Anyone would freak out not just those with mental illness. I could crawl in a hole and just die

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I really hope it won't be so bad. I'm very ashamed and embarrassed I was psychotic for so many years. I wish I had started taking an ap years before July of 2014. I will be rooting for you, valley!

valley

do you think things might be slightly different time?

i hope you feel better soon too!!!

i meant to say if youd think things might be slight *better this year around?

I mean this is only specific to me, and the things I did while psychotic. I definitely don't think anyone else should be embarrassed or ashamed of what they've done or not done, or felt or not felt.

And the T at the clinic made an appointment for me without me or my input. I feel owned and infantilized. I am so sick of my life!

angelique

Thank you. So much :Hug:

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I spent my morning drinking before I went out to be productive. I'm invincible no one can touch me. I'm hands down the best person on the planet right now don't let them spread lies about me hahaha.

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Yesterday I was driving through road construction and those jersey barriers were calling my name. I was so close

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Thank you

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As much as I love my friend, I'm thinking of breaking up our friendship. He lives with another female friend and she is in love with him. The way I'm feeling right now, she can have him. He should marry her but he won't because he's not in love with her. But they go on day trips together, something I can't do because I can't walk. They go to movies and restaurants together. Things I can't do. I don't think I want to see him ever again. He's the reason I had to leave my apartment. I didn't have a job so it was my own fault, but he told me I had to go. And I've been through hell the past 12 or more years. I wish I had never met him.

:sad hug: I'm sorry you are feeling so badly. I would have trouble with that scenario too.


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I'm not having a good day today. Some days just suck.

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whats going on?

Fortunately my voices help me cope with difference atgacks. Else, my cousin might be injured

It feels great to be home from the hospital,
And I don't want to go back...

So I won't.
The voices are quieter lately.
I think the meds help.

Happy xmas peops :-)