Roll Call 74

I'm watching hoarders and feeling glad my house is tidy and clean

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dang!
i am not taking anthropology now! lol whoa

Eminem won an Oscar lol

i can barely write a 3 page paper.

but i do have to take another english class thats all about research. my current one is just like composition 101 basically.

i woke up at 5am scared as heck to see my T and shaking, telling myself i wasnt gonna go. i fell back asleep and got up at 7 30, decided to go to group and to meet with T. still felt scared and totally certain that he was going to tell me to stop texting him forever because of my e-mail. on my way there (1.5 hour drive cuz i was at my mom's) i checked my phone to see if it was charged all the way and i saw a text from T. i thought umm am i hallucinating? surely he didnt text me... but he had. i felt relieved but still fearful i guess because i had 100% convinced myself of what was going to happen. i got there and felt shy, didnt want to look at T even though he came out of his office and told me Toby was famous because the newspaper wrote an article about his wellness center and the picture i drew of toby was in one of the photographs. he was being his usual silly self.

i was thinking yesterday... how am i gonna get through this?? i truly felt terrible... as you all know my T didn't tell me to stop texting him. he even told me he had had the same feelings for his T. i am so amazed about what happened and how completely opposite it went than what i envisioned and prepared for.

it's really becoming apparent to me that i make too much stuff up in my mind and then accept it as facts without any evidence. i hope one day i can stop doing that.

feeling glad tonight...just wanted to share...that i feel good.

feeling a mixture of things.

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Thanks guys. I just need to learn to cope with things better. I slipped back into some old habits.

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Bluebird Hope you will find a better way to cope soon.

sending good thoughts your way

bluebird

im really sorry

I'm sorry you're feeling that way

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As much as I was looking forward to coming here change is still hard. So is being an adult. I just have to stay positive

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i cant imagine how youre trying to cope all through everything that has happened.

but sometimes i just need to give up for a day or two. dont feel bad to give up for a day and let yourself take time to rest.

Sorry bluebird! I agree with newtus and take a break! It'll hopefully put you back on track! Take care.

Falcon

be well falcon

thinking about you

god ryan gosling was an a-hole to the journalist.

alot of them are aholes.

thanks guys.

I dont know why I do it, just stupid.

i used to when I was younger. It's how I started.

im about ready to goto bed

im worried because theres somebody that keeps racing up and down the street

i always think someones trying to kill me at night. i see a 1 shining light in the distance. it went away but idk who it is...

my paranoia flares up at this time.