Roll Call 75

Thank you. They're setting up again.

Wow, roll call 75....

I haven't been on in a while. My life has been really great. I recently got in a relationship, and I love him very much. The one issue is that he is 43 years older than me, so a lot of people are not understanding. We've got some weird glances from servers when we go to restaurants and hold hands across the table...but I love touching him, and I don't care who judges. I surprised him with a passionate kiss in the parking lot one day; he loved it. He was my mentor in college, then my best friend after I graduated. We were attracted to each other for a long time, but didn't act on it until now because of the age issue. But I'm so glad we decided that that doesn't matter!

I'm drinking an iced mocha from Einsteins. Yum.

I ran into a homeless man who asked me for money today. Usually I try to give a little here and there, but today I felt sick (I have a severe cold) and I didn't feel like stopping. So I told him that I was sorry and maybe another time. He followed me several paces and shouted at me, asking me how much money I make. I want to be helpful and I think that it is a terrible thing that homelessness is a thing in a wealthy nation like the US, but I was deeply offended by that interaction. I don't know why he assumed that I am so rich and privileged. The shirt I am wearing today even has some holes in it...Then, after I got my lunch from the bagel shop, I saw someone walking behind me while I was going home. It looked like it could have been him! :O So I'm a little nervous...The one thing that I think may have happened is that I can't talk very loudly due to my cold. So maybe when I said "I'm sorry, sir, not today" he thought I was calling him the n-word or something...I don't know why else he would have pursued it to the degree that he did.

I'm happy for you.

People who judge other people are, quite frankly, losers.

When you get out of a nightmare of a delusion, only to realize reality is just as bad. Yeah.

There will be a total solar eclipse in my country, too bad i won't be able to see it from my city..

Reality sucks....

I'm terrified of being hospitalized tomorrow, can't get it off my mind.

Very often they can manage things outpatient if you aren't suicidal or homicidal...

Well, I broke down and took a klonopin. I'm feeling better.

I csnt type propely

may too mich effort

im dreading night time

I'm not suicidal or homocidal, but im having command hallucinations telling me to kill myself. I've been hospitalized for that before

I hope you aren't.

Yeah that's a tough one...maybe if you make it really clear you would never act on it?

falcon

please be safe ok?
thinking about you so much

falcon, I'm in the same oat. Im frid i'm goin to be sectioned for somrhing

I got an outfit for the benefit this weekend. I was more excited about getting it than actually wearing it. The thought of getting "beautified" seems daunting. Ugh, fix my hair, make up and everything else! It's a formal event...why did I agree to go!!

I hope you are okay.

Deleted.

you ok valley?

I'm okay. Just a rough night.
Thank you for asking.

I've been binge eating. Zyprexa is really ****ing with my appetite. I've already put on weight and I've only been back on it for a couple weeks. I miss latuda. **** insurance companies.

thanks everyone, and I'm hoping you get to feeling better chickenfoot.

I'll let my doc know I'm not gonna act on them, but if worse comes worse and I have to go into the hospital, then I'll let y'all know

No one able to take me to the doc tomorrow so I'll wait.

Feeling a lot better today in comparison to the last few

Good morning all.

I hope everyone has a good day.