Roll call 94?

my mom just got home. yay... mama lets plaay.

Yes, it does have a good affect on me too. I used to take long walks in my 20s, 30s, and 40s and it made me feel euphoric. But I lost my back at some point and couldn't walk anymore.

I just feel bored and tired I don't like it. I was out earlier and a bit paranoid.

Still trying to get up the nerve to have THAT conversation...

i am not so bored now
my time is occupied by Google searches and music

Hey all just wanted to stop by and check in.

Sorry about your back.

hi blwi3310

Funny when another patient at the psych hospital calls you weird. Why thank you miss.

In my parents' city, the 2 psych hospitals were mixed wards. The 2nd time, one guy who was psychotic kept coming into my room whilst I was sleeping. Luckily he seemed harmless, but it still creeped me out that they would let male patients go in my bedroom at any time of the day or night, so I kept complaining until they moved him. The hospital in my city has separate wards for males and females, which I prefer.

I've also always had my own room, though sometimes had to share a bathroom. I categorically would not cope AT ALL having to share a room with a complete stranger.

The first time I went to hospital, having read about strip searches on here, I was PETRIFIED that they would do that to me, but they don't do that here on the general wards, idk about the psych ICU though. My bag was searched on admission each time, but I wasn't. I was sometimes body searched on the last ward. I didn't like it, but it wasn't too bad. Except for this one woman who used to full on grope my breasts and I hated it. They don't do any searches at rehab.

*Willow*

Me too!

*Willow*

Hi!

*Willow*

Findingreason - niacin is used in orthomolecular treatments for sz, IIRC, so it might be worth checking out if you have a deficiency...

I'm sorry you're struggling. Hope your weekend leave goes well and you get discharged soon.

*Willow*

Omgoodness I'm sorry that happened to you.

I had a great day today. Went to a holistic/craft fair and bought some pretty crystals. And then we went to a canal lock nearby for a walk and picked blackberries. Plus I had a yummy cottage pie for tea, and am about to pig out now on a piece of white choc cheesecake

Hope everyone else had a good day today and has an even better one tomorrow. I might be going to a Pagan festival tomorrow (I'm Pagan-ish). I want to explore my spirituality more, but have never met another Pagan IRL or online.

I've also signed up to a programme that does nature activities locally as I fancy getting into walking and it might be a way to meet some new people, but I'm waiting for them to get back to me. It's for mental people so I have to have a risk assessment to ensure I'm not a maniac of the axe-wielding variety...its kind of insulting really :/ It is a bit scary though as I hate meeting new people, but it'll be good for me so I'm doing it anyway (as ACT would say).

*Willow*

Thanks. I could always check with the doctors if I have one. Though I would think it would be okay because I take a b-vitamin supplement that has niacin in it.

I've been seeings figures in the corners of my eyes a number of times today...will tell the pdoc this Monday. Don't know if it'll delay discharge or not...

I think the niacin doses that they use are way bigger than regular multivitamin doses...like anything from 3-18g/day split over 3 doses from what I've read.

Do you feel ready to be discharged? What community support will you have? It's not so much about what symptoms you have, but how well you are able to cope with them...

*Willow*

So I think that Lamictal was not causing this stuff, as I looked back at my medical history and I started it *after* the psychotic symptoms started. I was talking with my partner and she thinks it's possible I could have schizoaffective disorder, depressive type. Though my most recent problems were likely caused by medication non-compliance....but my psychotic symptoms do seem to get worse during depressive episodes. Could be a number of things, so I'm remaining very skeptical of it all.

Okay, yeah I can ask if they did a complete test of my blood levels recently in the blood work I had done.

I'm not sure if I'm ready or not. I keep experiencing hallucinations. But at least I am not so much of a danger to myself now.

I wasn't expecting this....

I went to visit my ex at work. He was down. I asked him what was wrong and he said he had talked to his aunt and she basically (the way he put it) encouraged him to break up with me.

But thats only half the pain. Hes going to this group home next week. He told me hes not allowed to see family or friends. So today might have been the last time i will see him for months.

I cried. He wiped away my tears and hugged and kissed me many times.

Im in shock. Because... i just didnt think she would tell him that. Plus she told me he could have visitors and/or leave the group home for a few hours a day.

Thats not the case at all. She lied to me.

Im so depressed

I feel like if he had just gotten his life together a bit and especially stopped smoking pot, he wouldnt be in this situation. But idk. Because his family wasnt wanting him to live with them. So idk.

Sorry that im like this on here

Idk what to do with my life anymore. He was the only friend i had in this area. Now hes going to a group home 35 minutes away where he cant visit anyone.

Im gonna see if i cant sneak to see him at his work every once and awhile. But i may not be able to.

Hello

I was inpatient a few weeks ago and was discharged while still having hallucinations but because the risk had gone down they didn't want to keep me in. Do you have support in the community? Friends, family etc?

Upset with my friend, she seems to only get in touch when she wants something

Sorry you feel that newtus. Im glad my obsessions with girlfriends are over. Nothing but depression came out of it...