Roll Call 153

Same. I'm happier and my mind is more active at night so I take seroquel at night.. then it lasts until morning and afternoon and the cycle continues.

It was a dark knight...

I want to leave the house. I'm sick of being stuck inside. I want to go for a hike every day. At least going to the city in a few days will be away from the house.

I feel like taking a walk or reading outside idk

I can't focus. I'm restless.

Edit: I want to exercise. I want to move from place to place. I want more from life. I can't sit still.

I've noticed something while online dating. When people small talk with me, asking whats good, what are the highlights of your week, etc... I barely have any good moments. It's as if I'm hardly ever happy. I work, come home, and chill. On the weekends I go to a café, and then I have a few drinks to keep me focused for my research or writing. Drinking is pleasant, and writing is pleasant, and brings meaning to my life, but nowhere in there is there a strong feeling of happiness.

I should just stick to working and writing maybe. I should get another cat.

That's how I've been feeling lately too. I want to get out and exercise, take walk, spend time out of the house.. I'm restless and have to wait till the morning to go anywhere because it's not exactly safe around here at night

DT, ooo, I would love another cat but I cant have anymore pets.

I've made some pretty poor choices here lately <_< Not wanting to say much else. lol smoke weed every day :3

I'm worried because on my psychiatrists site he said he doesn't usually do disability paperwork. My review is probably coming up soon so I'm gonna need a psychiatrist to write a letter at least. Ugh.

Psychosis is permanent tho

Like I wish we got better and were able to work without meds after at least one review

But big pharma wants us to have negative symptoms and keep us on these shite meds. They can make better meds and they might have but they keep the chemical formulas in a vault somewhere.

Edit: nah jk jk

Don't drink tap water. Buy bottled water.

especially if you live in Flint Michigan

I'll try to go to sleep now and I could fall asleep at 11pm.. I'll try to wake up at 9am. Take Vyvanse at 8am. That's 9-10 hours of sleep.

I don't think I can do it. I'll probably wake up like next year.

I think it might be a good idea to just go to sleep when you people go to sleep.. like ~9am.. then I'll have all the light from 9am-9pm.

my GERD is flaring up again. Seriously gotta cut back on the coffee, its certainly not helping things

Hey everyone, how are things going?

I'm okay. Got discharged from hospital on Wednesday afternoon. Still have some symptoms yesterday. Had my partner and her partner worried when I was over visiting. Otherwise lonely a lot cause I socialized a lot in the ward. But I have an appointment with the pdoc on Monday and my therapist too. Taking a couple weeks off from band before considering going back. Band leader wants me to take my time and so do I. I want to prevent relapse. Also saw the floor bubbling yesterday... it was scary.

What's everyone up to?

DT I doubt I could pinpoint highlights either but I’m generally happy. For me I live in the moment not the past, this could be due to my memory but still, my point is having set highlights isn’t necessary for happiness.

I think this is common a lot of pdoc that treat are recovery oriented so they don’t deal with disability but they should be able to refer you to one that does

Hey FR glad you’re doing good now well except for the floor bubbling...

Picked up some of my meds at the pharmacy. I seemed to do okay with being outside

I might try to go to mass tomorrow morning around 7, It's a lot less packed than the later morning and evening masses so I would feel more comfortable. Plus it's not as hot in the morning

That’s great 😃 You know I got over my agoraphobia by going on vacation, I feel like if it’s something outside you really want to do like maybe a museum or something it really helps.

Got new boots

Take two...

Can’t see the photo but yay new boots 👢

My artwork was accepted by madinamerica and will be added to their que to put in their gallery, it should be up in a few weeks