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  #926  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 06:34 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
Why would it take an hour? Is it enteric coated or something? I think Advil kicks in within 15 minutes so why wouldn’t other meds?
It's likely. I Googled "How long does it take for olanzepine to kick in?" and it says "6 weeks" and I thought wtf? so I then thought I was smarter than Google by Googling "How long does it take for olanzepine to kick in for sleep?" and it says "2 weeks". Wtf? They give olanzepine in the psych ward to everyone to calm them down. I think they said 20-40 minutes Idk.

It's like the government is controlling google searches so I don't know to mess with me.. idk..
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  #927  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 06:38 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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I'm so frustrated about my cognition. First it was depression. Now I'm not depressed anymore. I want to be limitless and achieve great things with grandiose delusions and mania.

Idk..
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  #928  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 07:47 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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My cognition feels better but now I feel like an ESTJ.
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  #929  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 08:21 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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I love you all...
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  #930  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 08:49 PM
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Blue_Bird Blue_Bird is online now
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The depression I've had the past few weeks is basically just a crash from the mania I was experiencing for several months, that's what my doctor said. Which makes sense looking back. Things seem to be starting to level out though, just taking it one day at a time , today was better much better than the last few weeks were, so that's a start
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Diagnosis:
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PTSD
Social Anxiety Disorder
Anorexia Binge/Purge type
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  #931  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 09:01 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue_Bird View Post
The depression I've had the past few weeks is basically just a crash from the mania I was experiencing for several months, that's what my doctor said. Which makes sense looking back. Things seem to be starting to level out though, just taking it one day at a time , today was better much better than the last few weeks were, so that's a start
My mom says that when I'm a little psychotic or have interesting thoughts and talk about them, I seem manic. It could be because of the phenibut - That's what I think.

I just get excited by my thoughts really bad. I love my thoughts....

I hope you feel better soon <3 May your life be a constant hypomania!
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  #932  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:01 PM
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falcon09 falcon09 is offline
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I talked to my therapist last time I saw him about going inpatient, I said I didn't need to go because I was doing fine. I kinda lied, I'm debating going inpatient again.
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  #933  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:08 PM
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I’m watching a sci Fi movie
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  #934  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:15 PM
Anonymous40796
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paper Roses View Post
I’m watching a sci Fi movie
You can't just name drop my favorite genre without telling me which one.
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Desoxyn
  #935  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:17 PM
Anonymous40796
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I was dying laughing at my friend's facebook post of someone's mean uncle dressed up in a santa outfit with a grinch mask. I haven't laughed that hard in a loooong time! I shared it with my sister.
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  #936  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:19 PM
Anonymous40796
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
My mom said everyone loved the mini Christmas tree I sent her at the hospital so I think having it there cheered her up......that makes me happy.....😀
That's awesome. I love it when people care enough about me to send me cards, let alone a Christmas tree!
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SlumberKitty
  #937  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:19 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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Updated my mental health symptom chart for my computer (I'm so intuitive that I can guess these moods and symptoms to a 5% accuracy (Like 4.5 for example instead of 4 or 5 out of 10).

MH SYMPTOM CHART

2020

A Mood
B Anxiety
C Agitation
D Paranoia
E Delusions
F Visual H
G Visual H
H Imagination
I Creativity
J Panic attack
K Motivation
L Focus
M Hyperactivity/Mania
N Tiredness
O Hours of sleep
P Anhedonia

AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K(), L(), M(), N(), O(), P()

Meds taken

A Invega Sustenna 150mg
B Vyvanse 50mg
C Atenolol 50mg
D Seroquel 50mg
E Olanzepine 5mg
F Fish oil 900mg
G Vitamin D
H Melatonin

Drugs taken

I Weed
J Phenibut
K Xanax

AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
AM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
PM A (), B(), C(), D(), E(), F(), G(), H(), I(), J(), K()
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  #938  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:22 PM
Anonymous40796
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
That’s my bfs fave movie, he has to watch it every year.....
That's a preeeeeeety big endorsement! Do you know what quality it has that he loves about it?
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  #939  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:26 PM
Anonymous40796
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn View Post
@Desoxyn, about your spiritual thoughts (faith, God, hereafter, etc.), you are not delusional. You are a deeeeep thinker. All those things you said, soooo interesting! And about IQ, they only measure certain things. They aren't measuring this thing that you have, something more valuable. Thank you for sharing!
I agree with much of this. People measure just mathematical heuristics (if I can use that term) but not many philosophical heuristics, or not the heuristics that other people use that may not be quantifiable.

Also, what about morals and being just a good ****ing person? Right? Or what about ****ing life experience? As I reflect on everyone hear, you guys give good advice, and that's because we have life experiences that not many people can relate to.
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  #940  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:31 PM
Anonymous40796
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Desoxyn View Post
My mom says that when I'm a little psychotic or have interesting thoughts and talk about them, I seem manic. It could be because of the phenibut - That's what I think.

I just get excited by my thoughts really bad. I love my thoughts....

I hope you feel better soon <3 May your life be a constant hypomania!
How often do you use the phenibut? That's a funny name...

Maybe harness the phenibut when youre planning on being creative only, that way you can look forward to it and plan your day around it. I don't know, like, that's what I do with drinking because it's not really good, but at least I use it for a good cause, that's what I tell myself anyway.
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  #941  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:46 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Day Tripper View Post
I agree with much of this. People measure just mathematical heuristics (if I can use that term) but not many philosophical heuristics, or not the heuristics that other people use that may not be quantifiable.

Also, what about morals and being just a good ****ing person? Right? Or what about ****ing life experience? As I reflect on everyone hear, you guys give good advice, and that's because we have life experiences that not many people can relate to.
I know.. I don't know what is wrong with me.. I'm obsessed with "IQ" like an autistic obsession.. cuz I'm afraid that it will lower due to the antipsychotic.. Then what will I have in life? Nothing! No jk.. But I completely understand that IQ is just putting blocks together like how I do math in my head.. And there's 99.99999999% many other things that makes up the human consciousness.. I know this..

I should just ignore the IQ thing like how I have to ignore the soldiers.. But I always end up talking about things that my ego is hurt by.. like the soldiers.. They really damaged my ego.. But I must ignore and forget.. It's just really traumatizing..

But I promise to myself that I won't talk about the things that damage my ego anymore cuz there's so much more greatness to me that can be come by from being humble and modest (That's when I really feel happy.. It's just the soldiers made me feel horrible.. worst I've ever felt since my psychologist/psych nurse got really mad when I ordered mdma, meth, coke, heroin, weed and etizolam in one order)..
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  #942  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 10:49 PM
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Desoxyn Desoxyn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Day Tripper View Post
How often do you use the phenibut? That's a funny name...

Maybe harness the phenibut when youre planning on being creative only, that way you can look forward to it and plan your day around it. I don't know, like, that's what I do with drinking because it's not really good, but at least I use it for a good cause, that's what I tell myself anyway.
Yes! That's why I'm thinking of withdrawing.. I use 1.5g a day for 2 weeks. I must lower it by 100mg every day until I get to zero.. Then use 2g whenever I want to feel intense content, intelligence and creativity of a God (I've been doing that for my hikes last summer and that's why everyone likes me.. I don't care because it's the real me...) I have 5 years worth of phenibut (Half kilo)..
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  #943  
Old Dec 28, 2019, 11:12 PM
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Sometimes psychotic Sometimes psychotic is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Day Tripper View Post
That's a preeeeeeety big endorsement! Do you know what quality it has that he loves about it?


Not sure...it’s not my cup of tea....I think it’s because he remembers seeing it with his nieces in theaters.......
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  #944  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 02:11 AM
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Happy New Year, everyone! I hope all of your resolutions & wishes come true.
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  #945  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 07:55 AM
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Blue_Bird Blue_Bird is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn View Post
Happy New Year, everyone! I hope all of your resolutions & wishes come true.
Thanks, hope you have a great new year as well!
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi


Diagnosis:
Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type
PTSD
Social Anxiety Disorder
Anorexia Binge/Purge type
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  #946  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 08:08 AM
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Atypical_Disaster Atypical_Disaster is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
Went on a shopping spree at a san antonio mall. Went to multiple places. This is my loot. Including this shirt-like galaxy dress I got. But I need leggings with it, which I dont have.Roll Call 158!Roll Call 158!Roll Call 158!


I love the dress holy ****, that’s unique as **** and definitely one of those things where it’s like, not many people can pull off that look lol but you definitely do! Awesome Roll Call 158!
  #947  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 08:21 AM
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newtus newtus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster View Post
I love the dress holy ****, that’s unique as **** and definitely one of those things where it’s like, not many people can pull off that look lol but you definitely do! Awesome Roll Call 158!
Oh thanks. I personally dont think it looks good on me at the moment. Thank god I'm losing weight. But this vacation food doesnt help.
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  #948  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 08:22 AM
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Atypical_Disaster Atypical_Disaster is offline
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Originally Posted by newtus View Post
Oh thanks. I personally dont think it looks good on me at the moment. Thank god I'm losing weight. But this vacation food doesnt help.


I hear you, I’m way heavier than I want to be right now too. It’s annoying because yep clothes don’t fit right. For what it’s worth though you look great
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newtus
  #949  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 08:23 AM
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Blue_Bird Blue_Bird is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by falcon09 View Post
I talked to my therapist last time I saw him about going inpatient, I said I didn't need to go because I was doing fine. I kinda lied, I'm debating going inpatient again.
hope you feel better soon
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi


Diagnosis:
Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type
PTSD
Social Anxiety Disorder
Anorexia Binge/Purge type
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn
  #950  
Old Dec 29, 2019, 12:57 PM
Anonymous40796
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I would hate being an editor. It's torture. Think about being one not just for novels but for philosophy! You'd read ****** ideas all day, and pick apart punctuation, and give people days of work to set things in order.

Anyways, I went ahead and stopped using the term man and mankind, and replaced it with human, humanity, and humankind. My editor said he was on the fence about my use of the gender for all of us as a collective, and it was only right after I thought about it. I wouldn't gender God or my use of the term "Other", so to use man as a collective would be to taint my work. I wish there was a better term than humanity, it just doesn't have much of a punch, just seems generic to me.
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