[googley]

Have people talked to their Ts about their SI? I think I'm going to have to talk to my T about it and my suicidal ideation. I've never really talked about it before, thought I have let them know about it. What is it like to talk about it? Really before it was just being told "don't do it". What can I expect?

[granite1]

i have never shared with my T about my SI.she knows i have done it in the past because i dont hide my scars but now i SI in places she or noone can see.i dont know why i dont but i guess i am not ready to stopdoing it yet i have just in the last 2 months started using this coping mecinism again.i wonder how she will react to this letter i wrote her .it has a small ref to SI and i have no idea what i will do if she asks me right out if i am doing that again.

[Mike_J]

I know my therapist first wants to know if I’m in any danger of hurting myself (or something more permanent) in the near future, then wants me to promise not to hurt myself but to call for help instead. Really it’s just her looking out for my best interests. I would expect your therapist to do something along those lines.

Other than that I think you can expect your therapist to be very understanding.

Good luck, it’s a big step but one you should take.

[googley]

Thank you.

I don't know how to talk about it. How to explain what it feels like when I need to do it. I done really good. It had been four years since I last did it. But then twice in the last two months. I told her that I didn't know if I could not do it this weekend. And I still don't know. I don't know why this is happening. Why it is coming back. It makes me feel like such a failure.

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by googley

I don't know why this is happening. Why it is coming back. It makes me feel like such a failure.

Are you SIing again because of the stress with your professors?

[Skully]

I never have mentioned it. I get the feeling they would think I am crazy for it. I have a weird complex like that. I don't do it often so I don't feel the need to talk about it.

[googley]

Trigger Warning.

Sannah-

Partly the stress with my professors make it worse. I transferred with my T and I don't really feel like the new one is supportive. I was feeling suicidal and I couldn't make the thoughts go away no matter what I did. It was the middle of the night and I didn't have anywhere to turn. I needed something to make the thoughts go away. I hadn't felt that bad in a really long time. Like my life was over. Plus my depression was extremely bad. So it wasn't just one thing. It was a number of things added up to push me to do it. The time before that it was when I found out I failed my class. But before that it had been four years. And even then it was only a couple of times. When I was really depressed.

[Sannah]

Googley, sometimes SI can save your life. It can reduce the pressure. I saw that you had some threads on the Psychotherapy Forum yesterday and I didn't get a chance to read them yesterday. I will go read them now so that I can understand what is going on with you better with your therapist.

[googley]

Because I hadn't cut since the last session and my suicidal ideation were not that bad this week we didn't end up spending much time at all talking about SI. But I think it is something we should talk about anyway.