Four months...

Yup, it had been four months, until Saturday.
Then I gave in.

And I've done it twice since.
My arm is sort of a mess, and I wasn't careful to do it high enough that I could cover it with a shirt sleeve...I have no idea what I was thinking.

I'm scared the most of what could happen if someone notices. I'm terrible with people anyway...let alone in a situation such as the one that this could bring up. It makes me nauseas just thinking about it.

The kicker is that I don't know why I do this. I mean...it gets rid of the anxiety for awhile...but why?

Ah, it's a big mess, it is.

Even posting this is hard. Courage, oy.

Sounds like you have been challenged emotionally for quite awhile.Feel free to PM me anytime you need to.I will listen and try to help if i can. ~Dottie

TGC

Please try and not be too hard on yourself. We all have relapses. I think each one of us has their own reasons for doing this. Maybe you can explore your own reasons. This is a very difficult coping skill to stop by yourself. Maybe you could consider getting some help you along the way and to sort out things a bit more in your mind. Take care and be safe.