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#1
Nov 25, 2006, 03:27 AM
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I seem to be pushing myself harder and harder. Just doing insane things to my body. Like work today, I pulled a 20hr shift...I walk crazy distances...My doc keeps telling me that If I keep it up, my knees will blow out. I just don't seem to give a ***** though...Maybe I'm just an idiot...I have no cartilage in my knees or shoulders, and I just keep pushing harder and harder...I have a weak heart..well kind of...it's a moderate to severe murmur...and I smoke cigarettes...I'm just a budle of health aren't I?...Just kinda spouting...
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#2
Nov 25, 2006, 10:10 AM
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Hey, VengerBoi, lighten up on yourself. I don't think you're doing it for "kicks" but have some "reason." I believe we "pick" our symptoms just as we orchestrate our dreams, they're the best for telling us about ourselves and/or helping us at the time. Did you ever play that "game" as a child as to whether you're rather be blind or deaf, lose an arm or a leg, etc.? It's not a lot different, I don't think; our bodies try to help us however they can, for as long as they can. I've added over 100 pounds to what I weighed when I was young, that too is SI but that's not the point of the weight, is it! Nor is your pushing yourself your "point." It's our safety valve.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#3
Nov 25, 2006, 01:29 PM
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Vengerboi, yes it could be a form of passive suicide too. I agree with Perna, try and find the reason for your dissatisfaction right now that is pushing you to do this.
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#4
Nov 25, 2006, 02:13 PM
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There isn't anything necessarily bad or wrong with pushing yourself.... might just want to change the direction. You could push yourself toward changes you want!
Are your knees and shoulders painful? ECHOES |
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#5
Nov 25, 2006, 07:18 PM
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Very painful at times...sometimes it gets so bad that I just get numb...Then I go harder..I have been pushing myself all of my life...
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#6
Nov 25, 2006, 07:33 PM
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sometimes ppl push themselves because unconsciously they are trying to prove to )someone( that they are worthy... does that sound like something in your background, vengerboi?
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#7
Nov 25, 2006, 08:10 PM
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Maybe if you drop the cigarets you will feel a whole lot better! Those cigarettes are really hurting you! Talk to your doctor about a patch or try some gum. I hope you are able to heal which I know will happen if you really try!
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"It hit me like a ton of bricks!" 
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#8
Dec 09, 2006, 01:31 AM
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I pushed myself as you are talking about so that I wouldn't have to face the things I am facing now....my body didn't give me any choice.. it gave out....I had to stop running from it...
Be easy with yourself Michael... talk a little. walk a little. bring it into balance somehow so that all of it isn't either weighing on your body or your mind....instead its evenly balanced so you can carry it without pain.... I am always thinking about you and how you are...
__________________
Faith is daring the soul to go beyond what the eyes can see. |
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