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#1
Jun 14, 2008, 02:45 PM
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I think I'm going to explode..
I have this urge just to run around screaming and bang my head up against a wall. I'm trying so hard..but summertime is not making things easier.. I cut thursday night..I just couldn't resist..to many memories, to many flashbacks, just too much. Everything at home is just in shambles...I dont' want to be here anymore..I just want to run away..move out..but I can't. I hate the summer..I need school..I need a distraction..I need less isolation. I just don't feel like me anymore..I'm always so sad, so angry, I can't get rid of this hollow feeling in my chest. I want help..I want to see a thearpist..I want out of this.. I feel sick to my stomache all the time..I hardly eat anymore.. Somebody help me..just take over for me..I can't handle anything right now. I dont' know what to say..I don't know what to do.. I'm screaming and nobody is listening...     
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#2
Jun 14, 2008, 03:13 PM
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babe - you've gotta breathe! no one can do that for you =(
((((((((((silver)))))))))))) I hear you - things suck right now and you are overwhelmed. GOtta push everything away mentally until you can have some space. i think seeing a therapist is a good idea. but remember (something i am finally learning) they can't fix it - they are there as a companion with some good ideas while you lead yoursef out of the darkness. Breathe - keep writing - try to either give yourself some space, or the opposite - do an outpouring in here of writing and vent all that poison right out of yourself. i'm out here. kiya
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.   alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#3
Jun 14, 2008, 03:34 PM
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((((( Silver )))))
 We are listening. Try to be calm and take deep breaths. I know it is hard to fight urges but remember you matter and no one wants you to be hurt. I think a therapist would be a great idea- it takes hard work, but it can help a lot. I wish I could help more. Everyone is here for you. PM anytime. 
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#4
Jun 14, 2008, 03:51 PM
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Thank you both..
Doesn't help I've been really parniod here latley and my mom is going off her antideprressents..which makes her really edgy and snappy..and I'm her favorite person to attack because we butt heads alot. I'm trying really hard to be good..and stay clean from drinking or cutting..it's just hard when I get like this I feel like I'm falling apart..and that there isn't much holding me together.. I'm slowly gathering courage to make a t appointment..and telling my parents I want to see one.. Thank you for hearing me... |
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#5
Jun 14, 2008, 04:07 PM
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I am sorry to hear about your mum. I know it is hard, and by trying, you are already doing well. I think the T idea is great. It takes a lot of courage but I think it would be worth it. |
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#6
Jun 14, 2008, 04:16 PM
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keep posting silver. let it all out in here. keep writing - keeps ya busy and out of danger.
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#7
Jun 14, 2008, 06:14 PM
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(((((((Silver)))))))
I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm in much the same situation. I hate being away from school; it competely sucks the life out of me. If you need someone to talk things over with, you can always pm me.  Take care, J
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"One by one, as they march, our comrades vanish from our sight, seized by the silent orders of omnipotent death. Very brief is the time in which we can help them, in which their happiness or misery is decided. Be it ours to shed sunshine on their path, to lighten their sorrows by the balm of sympathy, to give them the pure joy of a never-tiring affection, to stregthen failing courage, to instill faith in hours of despair." -Bertrand Russell With love and hope, <~/J\~> |
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#8
Jun 15, 2008, 12:11 PM
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It sounds like u need a well needed break hun!
Do u not have any place you can stay, like a friends/grandparents house for a while? I went to my nans for a while a bit back when I was feeling like that, and it helped alot! Hope u feel better soon hun babyg xXx
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~ HEY! I run a site on mental health called The Manic Years. I'm looking for some brave souls to share their own personal encounters with mental health. Are you up for sharing your story? Please get in touch on themanicyears@gmail.com. Thank you  ~Follow my blog here; http://themanicyears.com Lola Olivia ~ 7/11/11 ~ my reason for breathing Bipolar Affective Disorder type 2 - (2013) 'Borderline traits' Dissociative episodes |
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#9
Jun 15, 2008, 01:05 PM
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(((((((((((((( Silver )))))))))))))))
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#10
Jun 15, 2008, 01:28 PM
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Thank you all..I feel better today..I would have kept posting but I had to go to work.
I don't feel as chaotic today..and I reisisted all the urges..I'm not feeling to many today..it's always there in the back of my head but today it is not in the front and screaming at me. |
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#11
Jun 16, 2008, 07:47 AM
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I am always listening.
(((((Silver)))))))
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http://purplebutterfly.psychcentral.net/ |
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