this is it

My "I just don't care moment. Back in hiding

Can I hide with you??
((((Colleen))))

Just don't know why I'm so down. Just am.

same here ..

My best guess is that its the february blues.... i hate this month.

Just feel like I can't shake this. Can't sleep most nights and others well I can't get out of bed. I'm sorry.

Hope u start feeling better soon. I'm going to visit my mom this weekend. That should b fun.

No need to apologize.. its how you feel, and this is the place to express your pain.

My best coping mechanism atm is reading. I can get lost for a while in someone else's story, and even if just for a brief period of time, forget my own.. are you a reader? Maybe try something along those lines.... it also makes your eyes tired, thus, making it easier to sleep.

Yea. Was just thinkin bout that. Watchin movies is getting old. Thx bud. Will send a update email soon. Barely been here. Just can't seem to get things right layely
Hav

Sending lots of love your way...

Sometimes when things just do not seem right, the only way to go, is slowly, they start to seem more, and more RIGHT. Sending hugs your way...that the I don't care moment will show more beauty slowly in the moment

Thanks june,, I am just in a massive funk since I got back from moving my mom.

Feeling pretty useless.......but thanks

colleen

What did moving your mom mean to you?

to me....it means she does not need me as much. less time with me. I got so close to her. and i depended on her. she coached me through tough times. and while im happy she is with my sister who can see that she isnt hurting or overexerting herself, i find we have "less time".

i used to be the only contact all day and night. and while i should be happy. im not. never had a mom who cared like her. so last night. when she was tired, and i needed to talk, i let her go to bed. and i sat up all night. not quite knowing why. or what else is bringing on the funk. just feeling quite unneeded. and although i have good things in my life, this just sets me back. my real parents, they didnt care, they used me, and shes different. I know shes happy. she was alone when she was in the dakotas.

Out here she has people to help. meanwhile i traveled out there 7 times last year when she needed something. You kinda know the background.

So as childish as it seems. I miss her. and i am supposed to go and see her this weekend. i almost dont want to go.

dunno

thnx

Colleen

Ahhhh, the reasons come out for the funk that has been going on.........

I hear you talking about not feeling needed by her. What about your needs? Do you need her to pay attention to you?

Why don't you want to see her this weekend?

Is there some let down going on for you? She moved closer to you and are you disappointed with how it is turning out?

Ah.......

quit guessing whats wrong with me

she just doesnt have time as much. and i cant get mad, i mean shes helped me consistently for the last 3 years. shes just trying to enjoy living with more human contact that she did have. so guess im just whining again huh?

just feel like ive been "left" by everybody that should have mattered. feeling like I dont want it to happen again. and honestly ive gotten so used to leaning on her. like were best friends.

know what i mean?

thx
coll

You once told me your true mother was Psychcentral.com

Such wisdom!!

Awwwww

You guys are awesome

I just love and miss her. hence the hiding. thanks so much. pc is one of the three best things in my life.....

just miss the mom who loves me. a LOT

Colleen

I'm a new kid here, but 4-myself, Your words of Wisdom had perfect timing On this side, "U" Inspired "Me"...Thank U ... I think I'm going 2-like it here....

quote=Junerain;956756]Sometimes when things just do not seem right, the only way to go, is slowly, they start to seem more, and more RIGHT. Sending hugs your way...that the I don't care moment will show more beauty slowly in the moment[/quote]

keeping busy during the day so i am more tired (if thats possible ) at night - works for me - somtimes you just have to let the moment moments pass and it gets better - standing in the sun with my eyes closed letting the sun wahs through me imagining that its chasing the blues away sometmes works - maybe it feels like a leaving... but its a change and you never know it could be a channge for the better once things have settled down after the move and all - I hope things improve for you soon P7

Colleen, why would you have to get mad? Sometimes we just get sad because of circumstances and there is nothing wrong with that. If you understand why you are sad and just let it be, it will pass, like mourning.... Trying to block or fight the feelings, thus, interfering with their flow, is what brings on feelings of depression.........

So you hide when you are hurting or sad? What is up with that??????