Sex Drive PG-13 (Sexual Content)

FAIR WARNING: There is some sexual content here. Not too in depth, but just be forewarned so if you prefer not to read it then you can go ahead and click off this post for your own comfort! =)

Okay, right...so I have a pretty big sex drive. I think it's usually quite normal for me, however, I would say that maybe it increases when I drink cause I get hypomanic (I have Bipolar 2). Well...I get cocky as all hell when I am drinking. Sometimes other times too. I just feel like I'm so hot and I can get anyone in the club/bar to kiss me or have sex with me if I tried to. I even feel like that sober sometimes.

Last night I was SO CLOSE to having sex. But let me be straight up--as staight as I can be since I'm a lesbian lol--, I'm never disrespectful to girls. I'm always
honest about my intentions and I won't do anything against their will. See, I'm not as asshole. I'm cocky as all hell, but I'm not an asshole. This girl was teasing the crap out of me. She would only let me touch her boobs and she mine. No kissing or anything else. Whenever I tried she would stop me and be like "I'm not a thought." I didn't understand...other than maybe she just wasn't into hooking up and having it be a one time thing? Or maybe she didn't like that we were drunk? Anyway...after everything we didn't bring it up again yet. I wonder if I should? Or should I just like leave it be like it never happened (even though I distinctly remember telling her that I would have sex with her when I was sober...and that still stands no doubt).

In the meantime, I was texting two other girls throughout the night. I was flirting with two of them pretty hardcore, but they weren't quite returning it. I already texted them sober to say sorry if I was awkward but that I did actually mean what I said.

So...I'm not really regreting anything BUT I wish that girl woulda let me go further and am curious if I should pursue it further now that we're both sober and both in the area for a little bit longer. I mean...idk? I am honest with her. She knows I would be up to getting to know her, but that a relationship isn't my top priority but it's almost like she has a problem with that. It confuses me a lot.

With the two girls I was flirting with, I doubt anything is going to happen.

Alas, I think A LOT of this is just coming from a high sex drive. Especially from getting all worked up last night with no real success in the end.

Should this be a problem? Or am I maybe just okay with sex in a way that some/most people aren't? A little casual sex...is it something to be ashamed of? Society seems to think so. I've been called a slut before for my intentions at the least. I've kissed more grils than I've actually had sex with, but that seemed to give me a bit of reputation. Apparently I do some sort of sexy thing with my eyes that makes girls want me. All I know is I really want to have sex like soon. The end. XD

From one Bipolar lesbian to another: I started laughing so hard, 'cause the moment I saw "Okay, right...so I have a pretty big sex drive" I thought, "Try having Bipolar Disorder." Ha!

Casual sex isn't something to be ashamed of, and tons of people engage in it. I think it's only a problem if you're hypomanic during the sexual encounters and end up regretting them or hurting someone else. If you honestly don't think you'd regret a hypomanic hook-up, then go for it.

I think it would be okay for you to mention your desire for this other woman while you're sober. The worst thing she can do is turn you down.

I agree with UCMATH, nothing to be ashamed of there. Just keep in mind that not everyone is into quick hook-ups. So while you're fine with casual sex, the girl you were flirting with might not have been. You know, just differences in people. Nothing to regret or be ashamed of, just something to keep in mind.

I think generally you're okay. It's a natural thing..
By the way, "thought" is actually "thot" it's like a term referring to hoe, or slut..

Yeah, honestly I'm not thinking it is a bad thing. Perhaps not something to make a habit, but as long as people are safe about it, the way I see it is that it's just two bodies. No big deal usually. For someone special no doubt, but making love and having sex are two completely different things.

Anyway...mentioned it to her. She said she didn't care that what happened happened. But I threw out the possibility of it happening again and got zero response. I'm going to take that as a no lol.


Yeah, I think that is how this girl must be. It's new to me! Lol. I've only had sex with 5 girls (3 I was dating), but always started it and was never rejected/teased in such a way before. I started getting a bit mad lol. If I were a guy I would have had blue balls lmfao.


That makes so much more sense now. That has to be what she meant. Gotta say it is offensive though lol. Like indirectly calling me a slut XD. But it's most important to be happy with oneself so I guess I don't mind much what other people think and I am pretty sure that she (and anyone who could have possibly overheard) thinks I'm a slut hah. XD

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

ROFL! You know what the cure for blue balls is? Grabbing the back of your car and picking it up! Seriously! It gets the blood flowing to your muscles and out of ... other areas so it doesn't hurt. Had to use it a few times.

But on another note, rejection is just part of life. (Heck, I've been married for 14 years and still deal with regularly ) It's rude to tease like she did though. So it sounds like you actually came out on the upside ... you probably didn't want to be around her if she was like that anyway.

Yeah ... that's the first thing I think when I hear "thot" ...

That has to be one of the weirdest terms I've ever heard so I looked it up. I guess it stands for That Ho Over There. Classy ...

A "thot" is not a slut: On popular slurs, race, class, and sex.

Yeah, I mean I'm not like upset/mad about the rejection in a "I hate you" sort of way...more of like a "damn you" sort of way (I haven't had real sex in over 8 months...and that was the first sexual contact period during that time span as well). Lol. But hah we're still likely to run into each other a few more times and I think we're both cool dropping it and just being 100% platonic friends or whatever lol. I don't have a choice of course anyways XD

I had never heard it before so literally felt like she was speaking a different language haha. I agree "classy" lol. Honestly, I think the term "slut" is nicer than "ho" or "thot" now. Not to be all philosophical or whatever, but Thot might be the most dehumanizing one of the bunch.

Personally, I don't care who sleeps with who...I just hope they're safe, ethical, and use protection hahah. If it were up to me these sorts of words wouldn't exist. Big woop...you did some things with another persons body and you both felt nice. The end (or so it should be). haha. XD

Now she's being rather unresponsive though, skipping eye contact, and walking past my table or me and not saying hello. Honestly, my mental health cannot always handle that kind of behavior. But you know I could be misreading it or she is actually weirded out after all. I may never know.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Totally sympathise. I've been told in the past that I'm too "full on" with girls. But its hard to work out whether I'm being teased, or if I'm too pushy. Like you, I don't sleep with anybody, but feeling a bit horny and drinking makes me want to have fun. Honestly, I think some girls just get scared, well most if my experience is anything to go by. One of these days that chick might get drunk and change her mind, not that I'm saying its good to get somebody drunk...
Oh, hope that made sense..
TLDR: You're not alone

Well she is talking to me again now which is good. We're not in the same area anymore though. To be honest I'm sort of trying to get to know her. I don't want her to think I only see her in a sexual way cause she seems like a nice cool person too and I would actually like to get to know her. I don't know where life is taking me as I just graduated but I would say I'd be interested in a relationship at somepoint so idk...unlikely to be her but we'll see I guess if she keeps talking to me and sees that I'm actually nice and not just attracted to her lol.

The thing about getting someone drunk is I think a lot of people do get horny.. It's probably blood flow. Nonetheless they say it's sort of rape, but I don't agree with that if you're still aware of what is happening and conscious enough to say yes or no and have the other person respect that. That being said...it probably is easier to make out or have sex with someone while drunk because they usually want the same thing. Like I said, I'm rather cocky though. Hard not to be when I have this pattern of making out with girls quite a bit at clubs haha. And being hit on. XD

I agree some girls may be scared. It's that you don't know usually what their past experiences have been. So who knows why they say no. It's just important to respect it and keep it consensual even if that means stopping when you're really hot and bothered (and likely annoyed/mad).

Me...I don't mind casual sex. It's nice and rather harmless if done safely. That being said, I'm also an incredibly loyal girlfriend...so whenever I do have a girlfriend she will have nothing to worry about. In the mean time I guess I'm just having the fun that I can while I am single and young!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk