Embarrassing Problem

I'm seriously self-conscious and unfortunately I was born with pale skin and cheeks that go grotesquely red whenever I get embarrassed, acting like a beacon to all those around alerting them to my embarrassment. This only serves to make me more self-conscious as I can feel how flushed my face has become and then consequently know that everyone else is also perfectly aware of my embarrassment.

Make-up doesn't really seem to help and I was just wondering if anyone had any other hints or solutions to this (dare I say it) embarrassing problem.

Any help at all would be so very appreciated

=

Sounds like rosacea. I'm not a doctor, and I know pretty much nothing about rosacea, but here are some links that might help:

National Rosacea Society
Questions and Answers About Rosacea
Article about rosacea
RosaceaNet
Rosacea - MayoClinic.com
International Rosacea Foundation
Rosacea Support Group
AAD: Rosacea
MedicinePlus: Rosacea

Rosacea is constantly visible, though, not just when you blush. It mimics acne with it's red, rough bumps and it's aggravated with heat and hot water.

I remember reading on a makeup website that said, contrary to popular belief, you shouldn't use a green color corrector to counteract red because it ends up making you look sort of gray and ashy. (I have to say I concur after using green concealers on monthly pimples). It recommended a slightly warmer (yellower) shade than your regular makeup to tone it down. I wonder if using a very pale bronzing powder would help. Physician's Formula has some very, very light shades that might work on your pale skin. If it doesn't totally cover it, it might tone it down enough to be more acceptable for you.

Good luck.

I can understand what you are talking about here, for while I am not pale skin - I do get red all around my upper chest when I am very very very upset or nervous.... and people are always asking ME why my chest is so red.... if they only knew (they caused it).

The best solution I can give is to work on relaxation techniques and find something that will keep you grounded in PeAcE when upsetting or embarrassing moments take place.... it has helped ME - but I still show my color of red from to time, but it is happening far less now.


LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( hugs )))

I don't have the same problem that you do, but I suffer from ruby red ears ... almost at the same time each day. (Early evening). They burn, and hurt and go bright, bright red ... and anyone who sees me wants to know why. Eventually I started telling them "because you were just talking about me" ... I really do understand how self conscious this must make you feel!

I wish I had some helpful advice for you sc isiract ...

Thanks for the posts...I had read up bout rosacea before and its not that cos I'm fine except when I get embarrassed

Everything I have read etc. has always said there isn't anything you can really do other than learn to relax and not be self-conscious...but I guess i was just hoping maybe there was something...anything that could be done other than learning not to be embarrassed - cos right now that one really isnt working for me

thankyou anyways and thanks for the understanding

I'm sorry I was wrong. Like I said, I don't really know anything about rosacea; it just sounded like that's what it was, from what I knew.

I'm very pale myself, but I've never known myself to turn so red. I might, though, and just not know it.

Dont worry bout being wrong - it was just nice to get a response and i know what u mean bout it sounding like rosacea

you probably dont - you'd be able to tell
n even if u did - i think in this case ignorance definitley would be bliss
lol

my nose turns red of all things. when I exercise or get nervous or if I drink. I just make a joke out of it..I mention it before anyone else does joke about it and then shrug it off and forget it...It gets hot too, I used to try to coverit with make up but it would melt off of all things...

Hi Pyeah,

I can see why it can be so hard because it isn't something that you can keep private. If it helps to know others have their own things too, maybe not as visable.
I have a friend who also blushes a lot, and I find it to be adorable. It makes her unique and special and I love it about her.
My T also blushes, and it is cute, I believe. If you were my friend I would honor your specialness. But I am not in your shoes, so maybe I see it differently. I just wanted to let you know some people like me see it as a enduring quality to have.

I have rosacea and the rednes always gets more intense anytime my face flushes. There are different events or triggers that will cause my face to flush, one of which is embarasment. Once my face flushes - the redness is more pronounced. All I can do at that point is take calming breaths and try and bring down the flushing. a cool cloth or cool water helps. I don't use makeup because that just adds to the general redness/irritation that is there always. Its just that flushing makes the red more intense.

I think you are on the right path to try and think calming thoughts and take deep breaths.

I can't right now think of the name of this.. ironically they highlighted it on Gray's Anatomy during the last season.

I hope you can research it and find relief! TC

Hi, i know exactly what you are going trough! i have the same problem, everytime i was asked a question at school, or had to give a speach ahhhh i was more aware about my face becoming red then the speach i was giving!

Unfortunatley there is no real cure! i mean im a guy so i never tried covering with make up and dont know any of its techniques, hehe, but its a very normal thing!

I mean i got to accepting the fact that when im nervous or shy i become red in the face, all i do when this happens is switch off the lights in the room and shine away! loool!

i know it is embarrasing but if youre shy, ur shy and your heart rate gets faster and blood is rushed up to your face! Accepting it helps because if your are more tense because you get red, than your heart will pump more blood to your face! If you ignore it it will slowley fade away!

I still get red in the face when im shy or embarresed, but hey its how my body works, i just accept it and when i calm down my face turns to its natural colour!

Dont get embarresed, its how our bodies work!

I found this site with some suggestions:

http://www.self-confidence.co.uk/blushing/tips.html

Mostly though just seems to say, "go with the flow."

Hi sc,
I use to get that way too and I know how humiliating it can be.
I then realized some people I knew were the same way and when they turned red-I didn't think they were stupid or anything, I thought it was kind of sweet and charming.
So, I figured if I felt that way about other people blushing then maybe people thought the same thing about me when I blushed. It's not really a bad thing. Once I started to feel okay with it-it didn't seem to happen as much.
The more self conscience you are about it-the more it's going to happen. I think the best thing to do is to try to make peace with it and accept that it's apart of your charm. ((((((SC)))))))

Jax, wonderful way to look at it. I learned to do that too when my husband explained people weren't laughing at or with me, they were "enjoying" me. Now I ham it up just for their enjoyment.

I have never heard of that. Thanks for posting it. Yes I could see how makup would be a problem.

Hey all, just wanted to say thanx for the posts

I'm trying to 'go with the flow' and I can see the wisdom in acceptance...hopefully it will work one day...lol

I have this same problem...& it's unfortunate that there really isn't a cure for it. Although I have heard of a surgery that could help, but I bet it wouldn't be covered on insurance or anything. I really wanted to become a teacher, but I can't seem to ever calm down enough for it, it's sort of ruined some of my dreams in life & it has affected my grades in college too, lol.

Yes, imo acceptance would be best, since you don't see yourself anyway when it happens that might work.

There is a cosmetic coverer, dermablend that you could use as a foundation that would hide the coloration should it occur while you're made up with it... if the area of red isn't too widespread, it wouldn't be too difficult to cover ahead of time would it?

I personally don't think poorly of anyone this happens to.

sc_irisact, I think instead of working on learning not to be embarrassed, you might have more success with replacing the negation with something positive? What would you like to learn/be? I don't necessarily mean something in relation to your face/blushing but something that would take your attention you're giving yourself negatively (I don't like the feeling of embarrassment when I blush) and make a positive (I like the way I feel when I smile, or, I like making my eyes open wider and "twinkle" when I smile :-) and then learn/teach yourself to smile when you blush? You'll be practicing smiling which will "improve" your looks and concentrating on how smiling feels instead of feeling the bad feeling of the blood rushing to your cheeks when you blush so the smiling concentration might extinguish the blushing some.

my nose turns bright red when I'm nervous or if I'm drinking. i tried to put make up on it and it just melted right off. Now I just make a joke out of it and forget about it...