What's the worst part about being single? How do you cope being alone.

i like the idea of not having to feel needy towards anyone

Precisely!!!!!!!

Spockette:
someone truly amazing has to come along for you to want to give that up. .

healingme4me:
Precisely!!!!!!!

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I think you are onto something here, ladies.

If you are truly happy alone (or, with non-live-in partners), you establish a baseline against which to judge opportunities for co-habitation. Then you are not getting a new person to live with you because you have unmet needs, but simply because he is too amazing to pass up.

That does sound great, now that I think about it.

Being alone.

Not having someone to hug, kiss, snuggle into when I feel the need for comforting.

Feeling bad about having only me on family occasions when everyone else is paired off.

Not having anyone who loves me for me not because they are genetically linked to me.

But I think it's hugs etc that I miss most. It's been years since a man not related to me hugged me

Not even men related to me hug me. Come from a very undemonstrative family.

In all honesty, no sex. That's what I miss. Haha.

Another thing is the stupid thoughts that come rushing back... "Will I be alone forever?" "What if I never get married and have a family?!"

It's stupid the think that way, but I do.

However, I just got out of a two year relationship this past April, we were also engaged, and I feel better now than I did in the relationship. (:

Sometimes, it may be lonesome being single. Here I am stating the obvious. However! I remind myself that I would WAY rather be single and happy with myself than in some sh*** relationship which would cause me to question and doubt who I am and what I want.

I totally feel you there. It's been way way way too long for me. And I also have that immovable fear of not getting married& having children.

Depending on myself. If my car doesn't start or breaks down on the way to work. Not having anyone to look after me when sick. Cooking for 1.

But love being on my own. Do what I want. No compromise.

I feel the same exact way. I feel like I have posted on this thread before but I honestly don't know.

I miss having someone to talk to and someone to connect with and just love. I still talk to my ex all the time but we aren't together. I have tried talking to other guys but I don't feel a connection with anyone else.

I guess I have to let go of my ex.

Whatever, I will just be alone forever, Screw it.

((((PlantinumHeart)))) I know what you mean by connection. I still talk to my ex too, and he's still a reliable friend. The connection with him was/is "off the charts." Never had that before and don't see it very likely again.

It's hard to let go of him, I know what you mean. I guess it doesn't help that I'm so attached to his cats that I come visit them now & then (of course, I "see" him also since he lives there, LOL). Recently, I thought he was engaged, then found it was off. I was relieved.

I also love having my pets around, but it would be nice to have a human to come home to.

When I broke up with my ex just over a year and a half ago I loved being single. But over time it has become very lonely. Getting sick is the worst for me. That's when I feel the most alone.

My ex always used to make me laugh, and I think I miss that since I fell into this depression.

I've been on dates but haven't found someone that I can see myself with, which makes me feel more lonely. Almost as if I have had my chances.

I try to keep busy and spend time with friends and family, but it just makes me sad because they are all in happy relationships and I end up feeling like the odd one out.

The worse part of being single is the toilet part I bought sitting next to the broken toilet waiting for ME to repair it.

The hose & sprayer sitting next to the kitchen sink waiting for ME to repair it.

The wheel sitting next to the wagon waiting for me to repair it.

The closets that don't have any place to hang cloths until I install the parts so I can have a REAL closet.

The grass that grows as tall as my lawn tractor waiting for ME to mow & thanking my neighbor beyond all thanks for offering to bush hog my fields.

Thanking the neighbor farm's hired help for helping me pull down the dead branch in my black walnut tree & then taking the clippers & cutting down all the low branches while I hauled them to my brush pile.

While everything piles up & I really feel like just going to bed & covering myself with a blanket & getting the sleep I very seldom get because of my stressing about NOT getting things done.

The company I had when married isn't something I miss because most was nothing but fighting....but I'm sure if I found someone who wasn't like my STBXH......it might be a pleasant experience.....but I would never hold my breath or even really want to desire something I don't think would ever be possible....I look at what I have & make the best of it & focus on all the good I am surrounded by....which is so much more than I had when I was married.

I miss hugs. I miss having support when I'm losing it. But, I like my space. I don't miss sharing my quiet time. There are trade offs. I try to remind myself of the positives of being single. Every cloud has a silver lining, sometimes it's hard to see.

I miss having another person to talk to, but I have issues in that I only want them when I want them, and then I want them to go away. That is why chat forums are helpful to me...I can be giving and caring and then before I get overwhelmed I can just leave the site.

I do miss horribly, not having a man to snuggle with me, not to mention make love to. That's the hardest part, and no pillow can take the place of one.

I'm not looking for a replacement, but it is very difficult to look forward, when backward keeps poking me in the side, reminding me of the good times, the warm times, the times of love.

I just want to love someone. Is that too much to ask?
25 years of being turned away or held at arm's length. Even by animals...so it's not like I can even go get a pet to love. Maybe it's wrong to look for a significant other to love too...but I can't just get a pet, have a child (as that would be VERY irresponsible), or connect with friends or family on that level as it's way too intense.

I don't know how to cope.

I miss falling asleep in the arms of someone I love. Will I ever get that opportunity again?

I totally understand you. However, I think I feel like the odd one out, not because I feel sad that I'm one of the few single people around.. but I feel like other people are expecting me not to be single. Or think I'm somehow defunct.. even though I may actually choose on purpose to be single. That's the part that's kind like... "ouch" sometimes

just make up to men, between you and me, they will fall over backwards to help you. Aside from that men: you can't do without them and you can't do with them. I adore men, but I'm so socially awkward No one will date me.

Guys i have been there, and yes its easy to fall into a pity party but you need to be your own best friend, love yourself and your company and basically enjoy your freedom. It is good to treat yourself sometimes and just enjoy yourself. You could get involved in some social group that will help you feel better about yourself, and most times it is through this medium life lasting friendships and relationships are started, having people with the same interests as you creates a bond that last a lifetime.

If a woman wants a partner, she wants a partner. There is no substitute for it.

Have a career, be a social butterfly, adopt a pet, adopt a child, etc. but that doesn't replace a partner.

"Apples and oranges."

My last cat passed away 2 weeks ago. She had already retreated for a while. Not having that company stinks. I don't mind doing things alone just would like the company. I won't be getting anymore for a while as I want to travel more. I've gotten used to traveling solo. Sometimes I'd like somebody but there are bonuses.

I miss hugs the most.

Wanting a partner doesn't mean you're needy.

Pity party for what? I was just asking how people cope with being alone. It's one thing for me to not have a steady partner, but I can't even get to go out or meet men. I don't get this world sometimes.

The worst part about being single?
~ I really miss the bond that we'd be together, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, 'til death do we part.
~ Holding one another as we fall asleep, spooning...that physical & emotional closeness is what I miss dearly.

How do I cope with being alone?
~ Honestly... and shoot me if you must.. but, I avoid being alone. I am scared! He is all that I have emotionally and physically. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 1/2 years, and I've recently recognized that he and I are just too different from one another to somehow make it work. Our relationship is also complicated by the children that I've had with my ex-hub.
~ Healthy tips that do help me become a stronger woman, individually, is keeping fit. I go to the YMCA regularly for work-outs. Also working p/t, to get some interaction with other people.
~ I am trying. But, it isn't an overnight change!