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Member
Member Since May 2008
Posts: 26
16 |
May 27, 2008 at 01:24 PM
#1
My bf and i have been together almost 2 years, and let me get this out there now ......... he treats me wonderfully, we see each other everyday becasue he does pratically live with me and i have no fear that hes cheating. Ok and now moving forward lol the thing that sucks is he has no want or need for sex. He is a healthy (well except for his salt intake) 22 yr old male. He admits he has a problem and I know it really upsets him whenever I start crying because i have self confidence issues and him not wanting me just doesnt seem right to me. Ive just recently started doing research on what may be wrong with him and the whole low libido thing seems to fit him to a T. He's too ashamed to seek help but it hurts me so much whenever he denies me or just says hes not in the mood. Any ideas on how to work with him?
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2008
Location: Africa
Posts: 162
16 |
May 27, 2008 at 03:30 PM
#2
Express your concern to your boyfriend and let him know you care about him. Sexual issues are embarrassing for many people so they don't seek help. It's too bad because many of these issues are very treatable. There are many reasons for low libido (medication, medical condition, psych issues, etc). Let him know that sexual issues are common and are nothing to be ashamed of. Suggest he seek treatment and maybe offer to go with him.
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Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 9,946
18 1 hugs
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May 27, 2008 at 10:15 PM
#3
Please reassure your bf that doctors are use to dealing with this type of medical problem and that they will deal with in it a professional manner...... his doctor is there to help me him - and a simple blood test might be all it takes to let his doctor know if this issue is due to low testosterone.
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Member
Member Since May 2007
Posts: 269
17 |
May 29, 2008 at 01:12 AM
#4
I feel your pain. My boyfriend NEVER approaches me for sex. We can go months at a time without having sex, and we live together! It is incredibly frustrating, and makes me feel totally unwanted and unattractive.
I hope you find a solution to this problem. If you do, let us know! __________________ "... am I gonna explode?" 
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2005
Posts: 6,106
19
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May 31, 2008 at 02:26 AM
#5
wish we could find a way to reply to this anonymously  we have the same problem  we know it makes you feel like an unattractive piece of crap, but we don't really think that's it  we actually aren't too confident that it is a physical problem, neccessarily  try to get that tested first, but don't get too worried if it shows nothing or he won't go for the tests So sorry you get this too 
__________________  ZORAH
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2006
Posts: 5,677
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May 31, 2008 at 07:26 AM
#6
My husband and I have been together 11 years. About 18 months ago he was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer that had metastacized to the liver and lungs. He had chemo, a colostomy bag, etc, and has since returned to work.
We haven't had ___ in 8 months. He says its because the scar hurts, his rectum hurts, everything hurts. All I know is I hurt!!! __________________ Parce que maman l'a dit 
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
20 34 hugs
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May 31, 2008 at 09:58 AM
#7
wow! so many of us with the same issues. my hubby has been this way since he was like 47. now 55. still a young man. *sigh* I know I have gained alot of weight since we got together and I feel that is the reason. I know when I look in the mirror I would not want to be with me.
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2005
Posts: 6,106
19
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May 31, 2008 at 11:24 AM
#8
{{{{{bebop}}}}} don't feel like that
 {{{{{mybestkids}}}}} after our husband was dxed with his terminal illness, he lost all interest in sex. we are pretty sure this is THEIR problem, the men, you know, not ours, the women our women's problem is that it makes us feel unattractive & rejected & we probably all had issues with these things already
__________________ ZORAH
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,840
16
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Jun 01, 2008 at 06:04 PM
#9
well the only thing i had an issue with in the past was an X-boyfriend who would go from hard to soft in an instant, and that made me feel like crap (but at that point i didnt realise it was probably the drugs he was doing).
__________________ Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you. |
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