Do I have a problem?

I used to think that there was nothing wrong with me smoking weed and drinking quite a bit. I now smoke weed every single evening, and have started in the day when I can too. The first think I think about after I wake up after I've looked at the time is when I can have my first joint. (I live with my parents). I rely on the buzz it gives me, I can't get through the day without it. I've been into work stoned and even sneaked a joint at my boyfriends house half way through the evening the other night. If I can't smoke I get extremely irritable and lose my temper, and I can't sleep.
I've started drinking more and more, and although it isn't like im drinking first thing in the morning, I crave alcohol, and when I get to the pub and have a drink, it is like relief runs through me. I often buy the drinks just so I can get mine doubles constantly.

I suffer from depression, and when I'm particularly low I crave alcohol and get stoned.

It's started to hit me that maybe I do have a problem with this, but because I'm not doing it from the minute I wake up, is it really that bad? This realisation that maybe I do have a problem is as scary as hell.

I'm 21 and doing nothing with my life, I've dropped out of uni and just have a weekend job.

Hi Thatgirl,
Yeah, I think you're headed towards a very serious addiction problem.
Can you seek counseling for this before it gets worst? It sounds to me like you may be in the beginning stages of it so it may be easier to nip it in the bud if you handle this with a professional, immediately or as soon as possible.
I'm definetly no expert on drug addiction but I feel it's a good thing that you're honest with yourself about it to be concerned. I think that's a very good sign.
Please, seek counseling. I'm sure others with more experience can offer you better advice but I wanted to commend you on your self honesty and bravery.
(((((((((((thatgirl)))))))))))

Hi thatgirl, and welcome! Your story sounds like so many I've heard! I've been going to recovery meetings for almost 6 months now, and everyone starts off their addiction/alcohol stories just the way you did. I think Jax is right. It sounds like this is becoming a problem, and if you can catch it early, you've got a head start! I'm 26 and started my recovery almost 6 months ago. The first step was admiting I have a problem, realizing that I was powerless over alcohol an my life was becoming unmanageable. Sound familiar at all? Feel free to PM me anytime ok? You came to the right place!!

~Rayna

hello thatgirl, your post was so honest and it seems to me that you might have a problem. But you seem to have recognised that all is not as it should be. Thats got to be the most positive thing ever. I now its not easy, people cant just stop what they are doing, thats the problem with addictions, they grab you then its as hard as hell to break them.

Maybe you need to see someone, talk to a counsellor? There are lots of ways you can go. I noticed you are from the UK, me too. So I know you can go to your doctor and be referred to a counsellor and its free. That would get you started. Normally they offer you about 8 - 12 sessions and I know that probably wont be enough, but the counsellor will then be able to tell you what is available in your area for people with smialr problems. Its a big step to take, you know, knocking on a door and saying you need help. But it might just be what you have to do.

I think we are all caught up in being independent and trying to sort things ourselves, I know I was. But if you can make the step and go see your doctor then things can only improve in the long term.

Anyway, Ive rambled, its just that your post has struck me as so honest.

Please stick around, let us know how you are doing.

All the girls

If you're starting to wonder if you have a problem, then it's a problem -- if that makes any sense. It sounds like it could be the start of something pretty bad, but you're lucky to realize it early on so you can take care of it before it really gets out of hand.

Alcohol or dope can't do anything TO me unless it does something FOR me first.
In each generation something like 5% to 7% of the population have an unnatural reaction to mood altering substances. And that reaction is it turns an otherwise bland existence into a Technicolor world.

It lets me feel like other people look to me. Complete and whole.

You may or may not be an in trouble, you may or may not be relying on alcohol and reefer to improve your view of the world, and no one can tell you if the stuff is interfering in your life.

But time can tell.

Given enough time and it will make itself abundantly self clear if you are one of us or not.

Over any appeasable length of time it only gets worse, it never gets better. In fact, in most cases, it gets real bad before something changes.
You'll know what you are in time.

I hope you find yourself among the normal people,
But if not, remember that AA or NA is that last house on the block for people like us.

On the road to the good stuff,
Richard S.