AA vs. Mental Health

Has anyone had the experience where people in AA have put down the fact that you are coiong to a T. They say they did it all with aa. I tried that but it didn't work. I was not dealing with my PTSD and abuse issues. I couldn't get close to anyone becuase I was still surviving. Talk with AA about abuse and they say all families are dysfunctional and get over it quit dwelling on it. Im not dwelling on it I was to remember and learn and try a new way. One that AA has not been able to show me. My sponsor wanted a 4th to appease her I did one did or want to or feel ready to no--i am working on a different fourth step relating to the abuse but she don't get that. They are making me crazy.

Yes crazy1..I have.

It is unfortunate that in many instances,,a persons ego gets attached to their success. When that happens a person will often impose a sense of control upon another.

In the case of AA there are folks who believe that the length away from a drink is meritable of some recognition when in reality each person is as close to a drink as the next person.

We all suffer,,that is for sure and no one escapes this trip without pain.

But every pain has it's source and as wonderful as aspirin is,,,it don't fix everything...same with AA. Even the founders recognized that reality in the suffering alcoholic.

Take what you need and leave the rest crazy and seek help where you need it...One size does not fit all...

Best of fortune upon you in this journey...

Lenny

Hi crazy1

You've touched on a big issue I have with AA. I do get the impression from the "old-timers" that AA is the ultimate solution - and that I should just "get over it" if something is bothering me. I felt like a HUGE failure during my first 2 1/2 years in the program because even though I had quit drinking and worked the steps, I still had PTSD, and still needed to work through the issues that probably led me to drink in the first place.

I finally did start therapy 7 months ago, and I am so grateful that I did. I am finally getting some relief from things that have haunted me for decades. I will say that without AA, I never would have been able to get sober, and without being sober, I never would have been able to go to therapy and been honest enough to deal with this stuff. So I AM grateful to AA for that, and I still go to meetings....I just take some things with a grain of salt.

I'm hoping that as I continue in therapy and in AA, I will be able to provide support to people who need "more" than just AA. I wish there was someone like that for me.

Good luck to you, Crazy1.

Thank you both for your responses. I do have an AA who has gone through the same things that I have and she is a god sent. I do love AA but they need to be careful about the things they say other than alcohol. Without couseling this time I don't think I would have made it. I am still struggling and they think it is because I have not surrendered. Or when I shake becasue of PTSD they think i drink again. I love AA but this is getting really hard. I think i need to change meetings for a while except for the few that the other lady attends who understands what i am trying to do.

I too have run into the attitude that AA should be all that a person needs. I've had people tell me that when I'm depressed all I need is more meetings.. BS. I needed hospitalization and an increase in meds. But in the Big Book it says that if psychiatric help is necessary, it has it's place in our recovery too. I don't remember the exact page reference but it's in the chapter "to the Family." Have a read of it for yourself, and be prepared to quote it to anyone who tries to tell you otherwise. That's what I do.

Don't get me wrong, I get a lot of support from AA and I go to meetings 3 times a week and am working the steps to the best of my ability. It's helping me stay sober. But I work my recovery in my own way and that includes seeing a T, a pdoc, an addictions counsellor, medication, and hospital based group therapy once a week that is most decidedly not 12 step.

Take what you can from AA - it has a lot to offer, but also seek help wherever you need it, in the long run it will make you a happier, healthier, and more sober person.

Good luck on your journey,

--splitimage

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Lenny said:

Take what you need and leave the rest crazy and seek help where you need it...One size does not fit all...

Lenny

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I've been accused of still "white knuckling it". I pointed out to the person that said it - that I was also seeing a therapist to deal with some of the reasons that I drank.

I agree with someone above, forgive me for not quoting.......Had I not had AA to get sober, I would not have had the courage, strength, or clarity to deal with the ROOT.

The good thing about AA is they are encouraging in the fact that you can identify with alot of the people. You don't have to go it alone and they don't want you to. Kinda nice to have the extra pat on the back. Take it for what it's worth and leave what you do not need. There's no crime in that!

Hi, why not give www.rational.org a shot. Get over your addiction once and for all and anyone that says you can't is in total denial or plain brainwashed. Cure your addict disease and focus on your mental illness.

AA tends to be very open and direct. For some people this works wonders. Others may need a more targeted therapeutic response. I am glad to see that people manage to combine the best of both to work for them.

There is not a single food that keeps us healthy. We strive for a balanced diet.

Why should recovery from anything be any different?

Lenny

i want both becaue i need both but they do conflict on some of the issues that AA has taught me. Don't get me wrong AA saved my live but im at the point that i need more and a lot of AAs don't support that.

Thank you for all of your comments they were very helpful.

Crazy - I'm sorry you're running into people with negative attitudes in AA. I was talking to a woman, she's not my sponsor but she has some serious sobriety and we're becoming friends, and she said it's been a real miracle seeing me change in the past year. When she first met me I was still in the psych hospital, out on a day pass so I could go to meetings & really messed up. she said that it was obvious to everyone that I had mental health problems beyond alcoholism. As I've dealt with those problems staying sober is getting easier.

In almost all the literature i've read around dual diagnosis it's very clear that you have to treat both the addiction and the mental health issue. If fact stopping drinking can often make the underlying mental health issue worse because we've been self medicating the symptoms. I'm pretty open in AA about talking about my drinking and my depression together, and so far I haven't run into too much grief. I have on occassion had to remind people that AA has a tradition which says it has no opinion on outside issues, and I consider my mental health an outside issue. I find reminding people of the slogan 'live and let live" while it can ruffle feathers get's the point accross.

I occassionally get grief because I did a treatment program and go for hospital councelling around my addiction once a week at a treatment program that is most decidedly not 12 step. But it worked for me. In contrast I went through a rehab that was entirely 12 step based and it didn't work for me. Perhaps i just wasn't ready, but I think it's because I responded better to a treatment model that looked at biology, nutrition, mental health and made extensive use of CBT.

I still go to and love AA. It gives me someplace to go where I'm not drinking and where I don't want to drink. It's helping me break my pattern of isolating, and I'm meeting great people who I can call and talk to when I want to drink. When you've been around longer, I suspect you'll find more people who work the program selectively and are successful. I know of several absolute atheists in AA who have good long term sobriety - they just don't participate in any of the prayers in the meeting.

I think the key is finding the balance that works best for you and not let it get to you when other people try to tell you how to work your program. A firm but very polite, thank you for the advice but that's between me and my sponsor usually works well.

the important thing to remember is that it's your recovery and your mental health. Educate yourself on addictions and mental health - it will make you feel better and help you make more informed choices as well as deal with people with narrow minded attitudes.

My attitude is, I keep asking the question, is this helping or hurting my sobriety? If it's helping it then I do it. And I was pretty %#@&#! up from my drinking by the time I got to AA so my recovery includes AA, seeing a T weekly and a pdoc once a month. It means taking meds. It means taking naltrexone to help with the cravings and antabuse to make me sick if I drink because I don't trust myself yet.

AA talks about going to any lengths necessary to achieve sobriety, well those lengths can include seeking outside support.

It may be as you said that you'll have to change groups for a while. that's ok. I just hope you find one where you can feel you can fit in and benefit from the program.

--splitimage

Thank you for your reply it really helped and I could relate to some of the grief you get about T ect. I go twice a week and also have a doctor. Your right i need all of this is I am to have a chance. I think that is why I had 11 years of sobriety twice and now I have 11 months. Untreated mental health PTSD is pretty devastating and extra help is definitely needed.