[SeptemberMorn]

Thanksgiving was peaceful, which is really saying something for me. There was very little overt sadness on my part. But I did feel the need for a Klonopin before we went out.

Today, I've got palpitations... a sure sign of covert unrest within me. As I mentioned before, I didn't hear from any of my kids (nothing new) and I didn't hear from my so-called best friend. In fact, I haven't heard from her in about a month. We usually go out once a week. I feel angry and hurt.

How do I stop these physical symptoms? I'm not sure that I ever mastered that... except to take more meds. Don't know that I can or want to release the emotions. It might make things worse all around.

[Sabrina]

I have found the physical symptoms near impossible to control . Sorry! I know that doesn't help!

Sometimes I think I go through the physical symptoms so that the emotional symptoms can "cope". I don't know if that made sense but it was the only way I could describe it.

I am sorry things were sad, but happy that at least there was some degree of peace!

[SeptemberMorn]

It makes perfect sence, Sabrina. It sure would be nice if I could get past it, though.

[Sabrina]

Oh, yes - I agree! If you find the magic wand is waved your way - let me know. I'll do the same!

[SeptemberMorn]

Oh, please don't tell me a magic wand is our only hope?!?!?

How to release repressed feelings without losing it completely...

[Perna]

Sometimes I ignore physical symptoms after figuring out that they're not "real"/indicative of an actual problem. They get bored and go away in their own time (same as with meds but without the side effects :-) It's kind of like cravings for me; if I can distract myself by doing a day-to-day chore (dishes, laundry, etc.) or reading or something, I feel "normal" faster.

Another psychological trick I use is to think what else I'd rather be feeling or have going on. Usually what I'm feeling/experiencing is appropriate for me. When I'm sad and missing someone I don't want to be laughing about it do I? So I change my "expectations" for myself. I think it's great, September Morn, that your body tells you that you miss your friend and children! When I miss someone or am worried, I get angry inappropriately! I know there's a "problem" when I get road rage, an unusual experience for me. I then "stop" and think, "what's wrong?" and only then figure out that so-and-so is in trouble or that I'm missing my T or husband or friend, etc. It sounds a little nice to have your physical heart telling you your have emotional heart feelings.

Call your friend and ask her what's up instead of waiting for her to call you?

[Sabrina]

I guess I DO have more hopes than that

As to releasing without losing ..... ummmm - someone else help please? Haven't figured it out yet!

[SeptemberMorn]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Call your friend and ask her what's up instead of waiting for her to call you?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

That would be the appropriate adult thing to do. My pride tells me "she knows your situation. She never forgets to at least say 'Hi. We're having City Chicken for dinner. My mom, the boys and the neighbors are coming over'" but never invites.

No, the last time I saw her, she said, I'll call you next week and let you know when my next day off is (a month ago). The last time she couldn't call, her youngest son called me and let me know why. He calls me Mom #2 and treats me as such. If something was wrong, he would have already let me know.

[Sabrina]

[biplol]

OHHHH Hon, so soryy to hear about your pain (both kinds) I know how frustating "best friends" are sometimes.
Mine forgot about our date to go to the movies and if it wasn't for her hubby she would never said anything to me.
About the other thing, My body hurts a lot sometimes, specially when my anxiety hit rocket speed.
Hang in there hon, ~hugs~

[SeptemberMorn]

Wish the four of us could have a 3D group hug...

[(JD)]

(((huggles))))

One way to alleviate these symptoms is to do thought stopping... you must not keep ruminating over the situations at hand... if you've made a decision to wait and see if your friend calls, then stick to it, or change your mind, but don't keep going over and over the situation unhappily.

Check yourself with the cognitive distortions.

You can also post in the Sharing Self Help Forum and begin to formulate and work on the pattern that causes you to feel this way.

Septembermorn,

Meditation has been helping me. My therapist has done guided imagery with me several times. It is very helpful. Here is a link to a beautiful meditation exercise. It is 20 minutes that just fly by. Practice once or twice a day. There are various free meditations on this site. Secret Garden is the only one I've done so far. I hope this helps you too.

http://www.meditainment.com/free_guided_meditation/

ECHOES

[SeptemberMorn]

I'll be busy doing something, quite involved and the thought just pops into my mind. I'll think about it for a second and try to forget it again as soon as possible.

When the palpitations start, I know myself well enough that it's stress or the biggy, repressed feelings. I do that all too well! Always have! I'll go along thinking "Hmm... that didn't bother me for very long!" and days later, I'll either get a panic attack or palpitations. Knowing myself like I do, I know I'm repressing feelings big time.

I'll certainly check out the cognitive distortions, though. I can only help, right?

Huggles right back atcha!

[SeptemberMorn]

Echoes, I checked the site out. It's great! I did guided imagery, too, when I was in therapy. I had totally forgotten about it.

When I was listening to the woman speaking, I started hearing the water and the birds before they even started playing.

I'll be doing the exercise as soon as the house is quiet with no chance of interruptions.

Thank you so very much!!

[(JD)]

hmmm I recently had a lady tell me that guided imagery was only for seeing yourself in the future... anyway.

I love to get away from real life...with any excuse

[SeptemberMorn]

That lady was sadly misinformed! It can work that way but you can take yourself away from the here and now and go someplace peaceful and safe! Your body chemistry responds as if you'd really been there! Give it a try, Sky. You'll love it!

I'm so glad you liked the site! I love it and it has inspired me to put an MP3 player on my Christmas wish list! Never did I think I'd be asking for something I bought for my son last year! Lol

Guided Imagery IS wonderful. I have done several exercises with my therapist. One for relaxation and one that was therapeuitc. The therapeutic exercise was so amazing to me! Before we began, she asked me what I wanted to focus on. It could be general or specific. I chose anxiety in general.

It started with some relaxation, focusing on my breathing... then she asked me to recall what it feels like to be anxious and to bring the symptoms on. Then I was to imagine an anxiety-provoking scenario without having to tell her what it was. She asked me to describe how I was feeling... to give her an image that would describe the feeling(s). (a closed door for me). Going back to the scenario, she tells me that in the room there are bottles from floor... to ceiling... labelled with all different characteristics one might have and to pick 3 that would help me in my scenario. (I chose assertiveness, self-confidence, contentedness).... Next I was to imagine .. silly!... that I had a funnel on my head and was pouring the ingredients from the bottle into my body through my head... feeling it flow down my head, my arms, my torse, my legs... to my toes and back up. (this is all slow... and the whole process took most of the hour). There was a part in there where she asked me to tell her something I enjoy doing (being online!) and she said that I would begin in the next few months to have thoughts of "I feel good" when at the computer. I think she was just planting that there.. .lol.. anyway. after fhe funnel/pouring part she says there is a billboard in front of me with those 3 characteristics written on it and tell her what color it is (red background/white letters). She tells me to reach out and touch it and tell her what it feels like. (too timid to really reach out, but imagined I did.. it 'felt' rough but not unpleasant, like a canvas). I opened my eyes and we talked a minute.. then she had me go back to the anxiety-provoking scenario and tell her what it was like. THIS is the amazing part! It was exactly the same, except.. where there was fear, dread, panic, terror... there was nothing! I told her the scene was exactly the same otherwise, just no terror! She just smiled and said that is exactly the way it is supposed to work! And she said "you wouldn't have believed me if I had told you before we began". I am still in awe.

I chose a flashback scenario and since this guided imagery, it has lost it's punch. It comes less freqently and without the intensity. So amazing!

ECHOES

[(JD)]

Oh I do so much this and more I vision quest,too remember?

[SeptemberMorn]

It sounds wonderful! I did similar things with my T.

I can certainly understand the feel of the "billboard." The things written on it represent strength. Canvas is certainly strong! It will bend but not tear. ... ... I reached out and touched your canvas. It felt good to me, too.

Thank you so much for sharing that. It feels like I'm sharing a bit of your strength.

The funnel... LOL don't we wish it was that easy!? I think I'll have a bottle of contentment, one of patience and... and... We'll see what other bottles are there.

Again, thank you VERY much!

The funnel....I know!! And whaddya mean I only get to pick 3 ?!? They'd better be gallon jugs then!

I like your interp of the billboard. I hadn't asked her about the meaing of all the images/metaphors. I like your ideas! Although actually it can tear, but not easily; it is strong. And a canvas is just waiting for someone to come along and make it into something... whatever it is the painter wants to paint is what the canvas will become. I am the painter.. I don't yet know what it is I want to paint.



Stay strong, Septmorn!

ECHOES

[SeptemberMorn]

No, no! I didn't mean that YOU only got to pick three! Somewhere I got the idea that three was all you picked!

Now I get what you meant by "canvas." I saw it as "tent canvas." Yes it can rip but not nearly as easily as a canvas that has been prepared to paint on. LOL (Anybody seen my brain today?? )

I've been accused of being too analytical but I don't think so. Besides, I didn't spend that much time thinking about the symbolism. I just interpreted as I went... or the images popped up... or SOMETHING! I'm glad you liked them.

You didn't say I only get to pick three.. my T did! lol

Hope you are having a better day today!

[SeptemberMorn]

Oh, that makes me feel better! I didn't think *I* had said it but nothing surprises me anymore.

Ya know? Your T is selfish! I would have told you you could pick as many bottles as you thought you needed! LOL You better believe those three bottles had better be gallon jugs!

I'm doing much better today, thank you! Did the meditation last night right before I went to bed and could have stayed in my chair the rest of the night. LOL I did it again this afternoon when a certain someone didn't come home in time to take me to get what I need to finish my Christmas village. If I hadn't done the meditation, I would have walked down his throat with combat boots on! I was calm when he finally did get home and we went out to get the stuff after all. Thank goodness for late holiday hours! LOL