Anxiety Daily Check-In point #8

I've been away for a couple months or so, trying to clear my head. As always, life has been a roller coaster. The last couple of days have been pretty good, because I'm actually taking action to improve things.

Then I googled some symptoms that my dog is having and got the impression he's probably not going to be around much longer. Going to see the vet in the morning to get things checked on.

My anxiety is up because of all of that. I've always had bad health anxiety about myself, mostly because I don't want to get sick and be dependent on doctors and nurses in my final days. Like my parents.

I don't want my dog to suffer and I'm trying to keep myself from falling apart about him. I gave him a hot dog for lunch and he seemed to enjoy it more than his normal food. I'm going to go out for a bit to get him some better food and treats.



Thanks for reading.

I'm wondering how just straight up asking my doctor for more valium will go. I don't know. I guess I'm just kinda numb from it all.

My sister is a hostile, rabid bully. I am a kind, peaceful person. I try to take up for my mother, brother and myself but it always ends up with her screaming and name calling. It makes me physically ill and really anxious. I don’t know what the answer is. It’s upsetting.

Jennifer, do you think it's a mental illness? It seems like her type somehow haunts a lot of families. I know what it's like enduring that. I'm sorry you have to deal with that, when you are the way you are especially.

I'm not scared to die if I'm being honest. If it even comes to that. I don't know. This monkey pox is a bit unsettling but all I've seen is clickbait no major news networks have reported much on it. I think my trending google page is messed up. But personally I am not afraid of dying.

A whirlwind of anxiety and depression. Scared and sad. It's too much.

My anxiety is out of control right now I hate it. Panic attacks are the devil

Roller coaster as always. Things are a little better now. Still very worried about my dog. He's OK today. Happy for that.

My anxiety was up and down all day. Now I'm just tired.

No anxiety really.

My anxiety has been sucky all day. I don't know if its from last night or just in general. I got the creeps leaving my house. Even the doctors was creepy and I used to be good about brushing weird medical people off. She just seemed really off her rocker though to be honest. I haven't been in the mood much for anything but water so I'm wondering if the lack of caffeine is getting to me. I had been drinking coffee several days in a row. I hope I don't get a splitting migraine later.

My anxiety was better, but then yesterday afternoon until now things are a little worse. I'm apparently not a good pet owner, so I'll stop posting about those things.

God bless you! I'm so sorry you feel this way. Please be kind to yourself!

Thanks @Breaking Dawn. It's been a crazy couple weeks and I'm just trying to do what I can to allow me to get through it and still provide the best care for my dog. I can't be good for him if I fall apart.

I hope you are well.

My anxiety isn't super super high at the moment. I did just take a valium though which is probably why. I am worried about the pain involved in my biopsy. My doctor says it will just be like a flu shot and that they will numb the area before they do it but there will be pain involved. Theres just a lot going on and the news I found out today was anxiety provoking enough and I have more stuff to find out tommorow.

My anxiety is better, I think maybe because I'm really so tired.

Went through some bad days with high anxiety and food poisoning. I am feeling better these past few days and almost calm this morning.

Anxiety spiked this morning (super early, can't sleep). It's come down since then and I'm not having a terrible day. I'm trying to just enjoy it as much as possible rather than waiting for it to end, which is my normal MO. Thinking of taking one last trip to the big park with my dogs. Won't walk the whole park, but just want to have one last good memory of us there. Supposed to be cooler Monday, so that's the plan.

It's been a pretty good day so far. I was able to get my dogs to the big park. That made everyone feel better. They're now sleeping with good dreams. I felt a lot of sadness as we were leaving, but so happy to have gotten the three of us there one last time. Got pictures and videos.

My anxiety is behaving itself a little better. Nothing to complain about, other than dirty wet park benches.

You know when your anxiety is so high about so many different things that you are not anxious? Thats how I am right now. I don't know if I am checked out or in fight mode or just super super worn out.

Like maybe you're numb from it all, almost dissociated, as a defense mechanism, maybe being handled by the subconscious, so you have a hard time explaining it?

A bit nervous that I haven't talked to my therapist in a month because she was away, but now she is back and I cannot afford it every week.

Yeah thats it

I had some minor anxiety attack where I thought I was going to pass out despite lying down. Besides that there was only one thing that made me really anxious today.

My anxiety continues to be a tiny bit better. I wish I felt like I (and the world) have a future that isn't super bleak. I don't though. I'm handling the upcoming major loss in my life as well as I can, but it comes with it's own challenges. Accidents in the house and whatnot. Not a big deal I guess, in the grand scheme. I just wished there was some small thing that would tell me that everything will be OK. Time will tell, but it is running out.