How I Feel Today. . . Open to all.

Today I am feeling anxious and its funny that when I read others are caught up in their homework I feel even more anxious. I am having a hard time concentrating and keeping coherent thought. I am very overwhelmed.

Hey Amazonmom stiff em all, live to 100 some day they are going to create a magic pill so we won't feel ANY THING until then hang on, hold out and tell everyone to eat your dust. Just a little aggressive today so thought I'd pass part of it along and hope that it lifts you up. Sending good thoughts your way

Oh amazonmom, I totally agree with the others. You do not deserve pain and I hope you have a really surprisingly good birthday! (though I must say, I hate them myself-- you're not alone in that...).
Welcome stargazer29 and griffenfirefly69 Oh, stargazer, I hear you on the overwhelmed... hope it settles down for you soon...

Today was pretty good, despite. There is such a swirl of things right now from very heavy things (a week ago, BF got a felony charge during a mental state of losing contact with reality, and having little memory of it--and we have no idea what to expect, legally or mentally, as this was quite beyond anything that has ever happened to him before) to exciting potential (though major upheaval) that I'd barely know where to begin, short of a novel. The exciting/apprehensive thing is new as of last night. Wow, there are soooo many what ifs right now. I don't know how to feel about it all. What a week.

Psych appt. tomorrow. Couldn't be better timed.

Payne glad you are feeling ok. I can relate to PC being helpful. Although I still don't have the motivation.

Stargazer welcome!!! I hope your anxiety has receeded and you are feeling better. I hope your focus has gotten better too.

griffen welcome!!!

innerzone sorry your plate is so full right now. I'm glad you had a pretty good day despite all of it though. hoping things will mellow out for you.

Today I feel pretty decent. No real problems today other then trying to get myself motivated to clean house. UGH!!! Really don't feel up to it, but I feel guilty for being so lazy.

Today is a good day so far. I feel optimistic. Hugs to everyone! I see my p-doc later today. She'll be glad the meds are still working.

thinker I'm glad your day is going well. Hope everything goes good with your pdoc. You are such an inspiration.

Today I'm feeling well. Managed to get a little house work done yesterday. Struggling with what I am going to do today to keep myself occupied. Maybe I can find the motivation to do some more cleaning.

Hope everyone has a wonderful day.

Today I am feeling tired, irritable, and anxious.

I'm gradually better, day-by-day. I have more and more energy, and my mood is slowly lifting. I'm still not in a fantastic place, but things are okay now to the point where life is manageable and not completely overwhelming all of the time. I still feel a little "slow" though. I think it's just taking me a while to get through the side effects of the new doses and new medications I'm taking (abilify, topamax, and wellbutrin XL).

Bipolarbear Hope you get to feeling better.

Medicated glad you starting to get better. I know new meds can be a rough transition. I do hope your mood continues to improve and you can find some normality in your life.

I am doing good. Got out and got some things accomplished today. Really a big deal for me because I struggle with motivation. It is a mental battle to do just about anything. Usually once I get started I do ok.

Much better than yesterday, which was really a low...

I feel slowed down though and unable to switch between languages... i experience this sometimes, and it frustrates me to no end.

Lots of good days which is always cheering!
love to all those not having good days

Im too confused and up and down and round! doc has signed me off sick for 3 weeks but he doesnt like to do that cos he thinks im not the right personality type to be left on my own too long! ( I love being on my own) dont know

Venus glad you are feeling better. I hope your mood continues to improve.

Poly I hope your rollercoaster ride comes to an end soon. I hate it when my mood shifts like that. Sending good vibes your way.


Doing good today although I am bored to tears. I am so tired of being stuck in this house. The weather is so nice right now and I would like to be out enjoying it. We did have a fire last night and sat around talking, so that was nice. Been going on walks, but that does not seem to satisfy my need for getting out. I don't know what to do. Guess I will just have to settle for the norm.

Yea! That's what I find too --once going, it's easier to do yet a bit more...

Today. Not good. At all. Yes, there are times when I've been massively depressed, suicidal etc and so on. And those are totally different, like apples and oranges to compare, but today may just be the worst day of my life so far. Just not in the same way as the above. I'd far rather be inundated with morbid intrusive images than have this be happening. At least that's familiar territory and I could take the burden. And the whole thing is just so surreal and very very serious there's a numb "can't believe this is really happening" feeling. Unless we can fight it sucessfully, our lives will be impacted very seriously and negatively forever. I can't really deal with that thought. And the guilt. If only I'd been there, maybe I could have kept it from happening at all -- the timing was close to me being home. (I've explained that from here out we will have a crisis plan, and he may not like it at the time, but we need to have an understanding that it is necessary.)

Can we add to the mood indicators?.... Freaked out, completely overwhelmed, meltdown imminent? --there are many more, can't think of atm.

Sorry to be such a bummer, but I just can't comprehend this whole thing, I'm very very afraid for him, for us, and afraid of an episode, a meltdown being precipitated from stress greater than I've ever experienced and that soooo cannot happen right now...Completely and utterly freaked out. My psych person said I could call before next scheduled appt. and that very well may need to happen. It's a long drive though. Need to call to see what to do in such a circumstance...

I'm kind of down today. Overwhelmed at all I have to study for my essay mid-term on Monday. On these meds, not sure how I will be able to memorize the key points.

I am happy ... Yeah !!! It is good to get to say that. I got back from a week's vacation late on Thursday and I had a great week, after my earlier doubts and worries. Still floating on the after effects. Got all the laundry done yesterday !!

Not sure how I'm feeling. Okay, I guess. A little overwhelmed with school and everything I need to do, but otherwise reasonably decent mood-wise, although a little tired for no good reason.

Saw my psychiatrist yesterday... he thinks I'm doing really well (better than I think I'm doing...), and doesn't feel a need to see me again before I go out of town for six weeks next month. That means I won't be seeing him again until mid-December at the soonest! Good thing he's so easy to contact via email if I need to. I'm feeling a little separation anxiety, I think.

Anyway, lots on my plate today... homework, commitments, etc, so I'd better get moving.

Best to all...

Innerzone I am sooo sorry you have to go through this. Really wish there was something I could say to make things better. I'm here for you if you need me. Sending all the peaceful vibes your way. I really hope you can beat this thing.

Thinker sorry you are down. I can only imagine how stressful your situation is. I really do hope your mid-terms go great for you.

Clive it is so great to hear you are happy. Glad to hear your vacation was great too. Missed you while you were away.

Medicated glad you are doing ok. I can understand the anxiety that you are feeling with going so long seeing your pdoc. I hope your mood stays good and you don't have to contact him.

Me, I'm doing as good as to be expected. Tired of leading a boring life, but I harped on that subject enough already.

Hi vjdragonfly !! Thanks for missing me ... Hope you are doing okay??

I am still happy. Maybe it is wearing a little thin now but I am still feeling floaty and doing well. Weather turned chillier while I was away and the main task is keeping warm. My apartment had no heating on while I was away. When I arrived back, it was decidedly chilly. Not so bad now the heating is on. I haven't been out since I arrived back late on Thursday. Not worried though. I hope to venture to shops later this morning.

Clive

"Now the party's over,
and everybody's gone,
I'm left here with myself
and I wonder what went wrong"

lyrics by Kesha

Please, do not take Kesha as your role model... wearing boots on bare feet is just yucky.

I feel blah today. Hopefully going out and taking pictures will cheer me up.

Hehe, that actually made me laugh, lol...I really hadn't looked at her but after you said that I looked and you are so right, boots on bare feet is just yucky...

How I feel today...and every day, I LOVE SOCKS!!!! In the midst of this storm o' poo, there must be at least one day when that's all one has to say.
(Oh ok, one comment to say. Today and yesterday I rec'd some helpful info, much appreciated. At this point, I'm actually inclined not to talk about it. Will do all possible and hopefully at some point convey good news. Until then, I shall try to defer.)

But today... work was very stressful. Was glad to have my papers in order so to speak, and literally as well. PO'd and stressed me so badly, I actually had to medicate for it. Feeling homicidal? Well, um, yeah, kind of! I'd have definitely been up for shooting some automotive parts of locomotion in retaliation for the complete lack of regard for my life today...(yes, literally). Good grief.

Anxiety has finally gotten the better of me lately, and I resorted to taking a klonopin a couple of times in the past day or so. I generally avoid it if at all possible (not sure why), but OHMYGOSH, it has helped SO MUCH. Instead of making me fuzzy and dull, it helps clear my mind of the constant worried chatter that is so incredibly distracting... I can actually focus BETTER when I take it.

Other than being anxious, things are okay. Energy levels are good, mood is fine.

School is killing me. I take my boards in four months, and I just scored 44% on a practice exam. That's not exactly inspiring much confidence. Hopefully I can pull my act together between now and February, but I'm feeling pretty inadequate and overwhelmed...

I am still feeling okay. Maybe the euphoria of my vacation is beginning to wear off. Back to reality. The sound of ice being scraped off cars ... brrrr. I sent off an application for a voluntary job yesterday. Fingers crossed on that front. I have to change my reality before I settle back into my previous existence.

I have been busying myself with organising of vacation photos. Back on my good eating plan and trying get back in the target weight range.

Venus I hope you found some solice in taking pictures and your mood improved.

Inner Sorry you had such a stressful day. I hope you was able to go home and chill out from it all.

Medicated I understand what your talking about not taking the klonopin as frequent as needed. I tend to resist till it gets real bad. Don't know why I do, but I do. Glad things are going well for you otherwise. Hope you can get focused and improve your grade.

Clive glad you are still doing ok. Good luck on getting the volunteer job. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Today I am doing eh. Life just can't keep going the way things are going. Have alot on my mind, alot of worries. I'm not really in a bad mood, just could be doing better. I have to much time on my hands to think. All this thinking is hurting my head.