[DaveyJones]

so now i'm here, they've shut off my phone....I'm just about out of gas in my truck...and I have about $5 to my name. there's another can of beans in the cabinet, some rice and noodles left. I'm so lonely I don't know what to do...and I really just want to go to bed.

I've been feeling really strange the past few days, really detached, almost high. which would be a nice change! Thank God I haven't had to leave here yet...but I don't know what I'm going to do.

DJ

(((((DJ))))) sorry you are going through such a difficult time...gosh, I understand getting phone turned off, mine is too...is there a church in your area where you can get food? just a thought..had to do that a few times myself...wish things were easier for us all..praying(if that is ok) that you will not have to leave here...here listening and caring...

[Lexicon78]

Do you receive any assistance from welfare? If not, you can try there. I know I've been in your situation many times. I can usually go to family for $20 here and there occasionally.

Try to hang in there. If you need to leave us for awhile, that's ok...as long as you can keep a roof over your head and food in your mouth...I think that's most important!

I'm so sorry you are in a such difficult place!

I sometime go to "food bank". They do help me out and I appreciate them so much. Very good kind people there. I have promise myself that one day if I can ever get money enough I will help that food bank for sure.

I hope there is some kind of organisation in your area that can help you out.

(((((((((((((((DJ)))))))))))))))))

[DaveyJones]

no, i don't get anything...don't know where to start. The Council od Churches does have a food bank, i think. I'll go there tomorrow, I guess. I hope I can make it...it's a few miles to the nearest bus line.

What's so scary is that I have always had options before...I don't have so many now.

DJ

davey, i think we have a fund here for emergencies. DocJohn takes care of it. please let us know what we can do. xoxoxo pat

[DaveyJones]

The thing that's scary for me is the way I feel--like I'm not a part of it anymore. I just really want to give up-I pretty much have, really. I know I should work, but I just don't think I can.I try to organize my thoughts, but it just doesn't come out right anymore.It seems like I have tried and tried for so long, and I just dig deeper and deeper.

[nothemama8]

DJ go to Announcements forum " Modest Needs" and also check with Doc John about fund here , stay safe hun
Angie

davey, as long as you do nothing, expect nothing. xoxoxo pat

[DaveyJones]

thanks for the suggestions, pat & nothemama. I'm sure I can scare up something around here. Pat, I hear you...Asking for help is pathologicaly hard for me. I want to move on, I keep making plans and I just can't seem to get them going or keep them going. I'm really so discouraged...I don't know if I can do all this. my mind clouds up, I make terrible careless errors constantly, even when I am working (which is why I'm not)...I don't have anyone to help me or hug me or tell me it's OK...I'm just so tired.

[nothemama8]

We'll hug ya sweetie
{{{{{{{{{{{{{DJ}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

[Azalysa]

And here's some more {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{DJ}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I was pretty much ready to give up during the last two weeks. Then either some of my meds FINALLY kicked in instead of just giving me horrible side-effects, or a chemical readjusted itself in my brain or maybe it's the moon...whatever things just got better.

Please don't be so hard on yourself about the work thing. I'm very proficient in my jobs and I was embarrassed about being on disability. I also hate to ask for help (my Mother mentioned that to me just today and my T. "fussed" at me for not calling her when I was in "the hole." Are you able to call your T.?

What I keep bringing myself back to is I/We have a physical illness - we're not "trying" to be like this - it's pure hell!!

I wished I lived nearby so I could share some food with you

Instead I'll send more {{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}

[blackdragon]

(((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))) if u need to talk just PM me

[hillbunnyb]

Everywhere I see your name it's been encouraging people to hang on, I am so sad to find you in the pit!!!! Granny gear down and grind out the basics: food is at the top of the list.
I've been in cold molasses myself, emotionally, lately. Slog on through bro, slog on through.

Davey....what will you tell your daughters, if you decided to give up?